Sarah McElwain - To the Happy Couple: Creating a Great Wedding Toast with Style

to the HAPPY
COUPLE Creating a Great Wedding Toast with Style BY SARAH M c ELWAIN ILLUSTRATIONS BY DIANA MARYE Text copyright 2006 by SARAH M c ELWAIN . Illustrations copyright 2006 by DIANA MARYE . All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced in any form without written permission from the publisher. ISBN: 978-1-4521-2849-8 The Library of Congress has previously cataloged this title under: ISBN 0-8118-4961-9 Designed by AYAKO AKAZAWA Distributed in Canada by Raincoast Books 9050 Shaughnessy Street Vancouver, British Columbia V6P 6E5 Chronicle Books LLC 680 Second Street San Francisco, California 94107 www.chroniclebooks.com

W hat would a wedding be without a toast to the health and happiness of the newly married couple? The toast is the time to stand up and celebrate marriage, love, commitment, and the creation of a new family. Some cultures even believe that a marriage that is not properly toasted is jinxed from the start.

Wedding toasts can be traced back to biblical times, and almost every culture has developed its own, often elaborate, form of this tradition. The word toast derives from the sixteenth-century French custom of putting bread into the glass before raising it in tribute. Why is this ancient tradition still an important part of every wedding? In addition to simply marking the occasion, toasts add to the celebratory mood of any wedding. It doesnt matter whether its a formal affair many months in planning, or a small gathering of friends at a backyard barbecue. A few eloquent, affectionate, or witty toasts will make the occasion more memorable. Toasts also serve the social function of bringing a room together.

At todays weddings, the bride and groom may be from very different ethnic, racial, or class backgrounds, or the couple might be of the same gender. New in-laws are often meeting for the first time. A few well-planned, gracious toasts can help smooth even the most difficult social situation. Toasts assert our shared values. Love, commitment, and the importance of family, as well as the fun of romance, are the subject of toasts. There may be many differences among the guests at a wedding reception.

A good toast reminds all present why they have gathered together on this occasionto wish love and happiness to the new couple! There are as many ways to give a wedding toast as there are styles of weddings. A toast can be simple and traditional, as in the classic line, Heres to love and laughter... and happily ever after! Or a short toast can be proposed with a quotation on love or marriage, such as this selection from Antoine de Saint-Exuprys well-known work Le Petit Prince: Love does not consist in gazing at each other but in looking outward together in the same direction. Heres to Jennifer and Jason! Alternatively, a longer wedding toast can be a well-composed, beautifully delivered speech that expresses deeper feelings, includes personal anecdotes, and wishes the happy couple well. Whatever the type of toast, its important to consider how best to offer it. Once youre familiar with the traditions surrounding toasting, its time to write the perfect toast for your event. Once youre familiar with the traditions surrounding toasting, its time to write the perfect toast for your event.

Part Two gives simple guidelines for creating just the right toast to fit the mood of the wedding and the personalities of the honorees, with tips on delivering any speech smoothly. In addition to toasting the health and happiness of the bride and groom, toasts can welcome new in-laws, honor parents, or thank friends and family at any wedding-related event. Part Three of To the Happy Couple contains a collection of simple toasts for many occasions. In the On Love and Marriage section, youll find thoughts on wedded love and romance by famous and not-so-famous writers, wits, philosophers, celebrities, and songwriters, all of which can be used as toasts at a wedding reception. If you are looking for a toast to make at a family or rehearsal dinner, the On Friends and Family section will provide inspiration. Brides and grooms, too, might want to offer a toast to their new spouses or say a few words thanking family and friends; the For Brides and Grooms section is for them.

Sometimes a simple toast is best. If you want to raise your glass and just say Cheers! or To love and luck! in a language thats appropriate to the bride or grooms heritage, the In Many Languages section contains appropriate phrases in everything from Albanian to Zulu. Toasts are also a part of the fun of pre-wedding festivities. A wickedly irreverent toast can be the highlight of a bachelor party or bridal shower. In For Bachelor Parties, Bridal Showers, and Jack & Jills you will find a collection of bawdy, ironic, slightly off-color observations on human behavior and the war between the sexes. Whatever the theme you choose or the occasion, a heartfelt and appropriate toast is sure to be a treasured part of the memories of the bride and groom, their families, and their guests.

Whether youre a bride or groom, a nervous best man giving his first toast, or an experienced master of ceremonies, To the Happy Couple is the only guide youll ever need to create and deliver the perfect wedding toast. Who should make a wedding toast? And to whom? If you are the best man at a wedding, its expected that youll stand up and say a few words about the bride and groom. The maid of honor and the father of the bride are two other members of the traditional wedding party who are often expected to propose a toast. At formal American weddings, the most traditional order is best man, groom, maid of honor, bride, and the father of the bride. Traditions differ, and at many British weddings the father of the bride normally proposes the first toast, welcoming his guests as the host, whereas the best man closes the party. These roles can be flexible.

The grooms chief attendant may not be a best man in the traditional sense, but his sister or female best friend, and its perfectly appropriate for her to speak first. Or, if you like, you can ask a family friend or a beloved aunt or uncle to propose a toast. As long as someone stands up and proposes a toast to the health and happiness of the bride and groom, it doesnt really matter who does it. Anyone who wants to make a wedding toast is usually encouraged to do so. Its easy to get up at a rehearsal dinner or engagement party and propose a toast or to deliver the hilarious speech youve prepared for a bachelor party or bridal shower, thanks to the relative informality of such occasions. But if you want to deliver a personal toast at a wedding reception and are not part of the traditional wedding party, check with the host or planners first.

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