Jennifer Lata Rung - The Everything Bridesmaid Book: From Planning the Shower to Supporting the Bride, All You Need to Survive and Enjoy the Wedding

THE
EVERYTHING
BRIDESMAID
BOOK

From planning the shower to
supporting the bride all you need
to survive and enjoy the wedding

Jennifer Lata Rung

Copyright 2004, F+W Publications, Inc.,
All rights reserved. This book, or parts thereof, may not be reproduced
in any form without permission from the publisher; exceptions
are made for brief excerpts used in published reviews.

An Everything Series Book.
Everything is a registered trademark of F+W Publications, Inc.

Published by Adams Media, an imprint of Simon & Schuster, Inc.
57 Littlefield Street, Avon, MA 02322 U.S.A.
www.adamsmedia.com

ISBN 13: 978-1-58062-982-9
ISBN 10: 1-58062-982-2
eISBN 13: 978-1-44052-271-0
Printed in the United States of America.

J I H G

Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data
Rung, Jennifer Lata.
The everything bridesmaid book / Jennifer Lata Rung.
p. cm.
(An everything series book)
ISBN 1-58062-982-2
1. Bridesmaids. 2. Wedding etiquette. I. Title. II. Series:
Everything series.
BJ2065.W43R86 2004
395.2'2-dc22 2003016973

This publication is designed to provide accurate and authoritative information with regard to the subject matter covered. It is sold with the understanding that the publisher is not engaged in rendering legal, accounting, or other professional advice. If legal advice or other expert assistance is required, the services of a competent professional person should be sought.

From a Declaration of Principles jointly adopted by a
Committee of the American Bar Association and
a Committee of Publishers and Associations

Illustrations by Barry Littmann.

This book is available at quantity discounts for bulk purchases.
For information, call 1-800-289-0963.

Welcome to the
EVERYTHING series!

THESE HANDY, accessible books give you all you need to tackle a difficult project, gain a new hobby, comprehend a fascinating topic, prepare for an exam, or even brush up on something you learned back in school but have since forgotten.

You can read an EVERYTHING book from cover-to-cover or just pick out the information you want from our four useful boxes: e-facts, e-ssentials, e-alerts, and e-questions. We literally give you everything you need to know on the subject, but throw in a lot of fun stuff along the way, too.

We now have well over 150 EVERYTHING books in print, spanning such wide-ranging topics as weddings, pregnancy, wine, learning guitar, one-pot cooking, managing people, and so much more. When youre done reading them all, you can finally say you know EVERYTHING!

FACTS: Important sound bytes of information

ESSENTIALS: Quick and handy tips

ALERTS!: Urgent warnings

QUESTIONS: Solutions to common problems

THE
EVERYTHING
Series

Dear Reader,

Ive had the privilege of attending, observing, andparticipating in many weddings. Which means Ive alsobeen a bridesmaid multiple times, for better or worse.In that interim I also planned my own wedding, whichoffered up some valuable insight into the other side.And the ultimate conclusion Ive come to about bridesmaidsis this: Its all about the bride, and not at allabout the maids. The best bridesmaid is completelyselfless, willing to work silently behind the scenes, andeager to lend a hand... without getting carried away.Shes there strictly to make the brides wedding day-and the days preceding it-even better for her. Knowingthis doesnt necessarily make it easy, of course.

And thats why Ive written this book. Because therole of the bridesmaid is not etched in stone, thisbook is meant to serve as a starting point and guidefor reaching your ultimate goal-helping to create bridalbliss. So good luck and more important, have fun!

THE
EVERYTHING
_______Series_______

EDITORIAL

Publishing Director: Gary M. Krebs
Managing Editor: Kate McBride
Copy Chief: Laura MacLaughlin
Acquisitions Editor: Bethany Brown
Development Editor: Karen Jacot Johnson
Production Editor: Khrysti Nazzaro,
Jamie Wielgus

PRODUCTION

Production Director: Susan Beale
Production Manager: Michelle Roy Kelly
Series Designer: Daria Perreault
Cover Design: Paul Beatrice and Frank Rivera
Layout and Graphics: Colleen Cunningham,
Rachael Eiben, Michelle Roy Kelly,
Daria Perreault, Erin Ring

Visit the entire Everythingseries at everything.com

To my sister Kim a beautiful bridesmaid, inside & out

Contents

Acknowledgments

Thanks to the beautiful brides with whom I researched this book over the years Tammy, Jen, Nina, Deena, Kate, Emily, and Miffy. And thanks to my own maids for making it all so much fun.

Top Ten
Bridesmaid Controversies

You werent asked.

You were asked but youre not sure why.

She asked you but youre not planning on asking her.

Her metamorphosis into Bridezilla is complete.

You blow off your bridesmaid duties.

Youre not crazy about the other bridesmaids.

The other bridesmaids could care less about you.

You love the bride but cant tolerate the groom.

Shes all about the Vera Wang and youre on a Goodwill budget.

The dress lives up to the clich.

Introduction

THERES NO ARGUING: Its her day. So where does that leave you? Playing understudy to her bright shining star? Benchwarmer to her starting position? Ugly stepsister to her Cinderella? Well, yes. And no. We both know youre no ugly stepsister. But we also know that as a bridesmaid, youre not the intended recipient of the coveted glass slipper (or the platinum-set diamond). If youre used to being the center of attention, adopting this role may take some time and patience, but remember, your time will come, if it hasnt already. Keep in mind, however, that there will be plenty of behind-the-scenes responsibilities that will, from time to time, serve to shed light on your existence. With that in mind, its important to be prepared when that fleeting glare falls temporarily on you.

Youve probably already heard tell of some of your supposed responsibilities, like throwing a shower, hosting a bachelorette party, plus helping the bride in a myriad of other ways most of which seem a bit nebulous and difficult to pin down. Your mothers telling you one thing, the brides telling you another, and your cousin is telling you something altogether different. Whos right? And to whom should you ultimately listen?

The EverythingBridesmaid Book takes the mystery out of the prewedding mayhem and provides you with options that you and your fellow bridesmaids will feel comfortable following, from the shower to the bridesmaid dress to the bachelorette party and beyond.