Roy Sheppard - How to be LOVED: from Dating to Mating

Table of Contents

by

Roy Sheppard

The paperback version of this eBook is entitled

How to Be The One

Published by Centre Publishing

Copyright 2015 Roy Sheppard

This edition updated June 2021

ISBN: Paperback 978-1901534139

Roy Sheppards website: http://www.RoySheppard.co.uk

Cover designed by Jeanine Henning www.jeaninehenning.com

Roy Sheppard has asserted his rights under the Copyright, Designs and Patents Act 1988, to be identified as the author of this work.

This eBook is licensed for your personal enjoyment only. It may not be re-sold or given away to other people. If you would like to share this eBook with another person, please purchase an additional copy for each recipient. If youre reading this eBook and did not purchase it, or it was not purchased for your use only, then please purchase your own copy. Thank you for respecting the hard work of this author.

Although every precaution has been taken in its preparation, the publisher and author assumes no responsibility for errors or omissions. Neither is any liability assumed for damages resulting from the use of the information contained herein. Neither the author nor the publisher are qualified to give advice on legal or financial matters. Readers are reminded always to consult with appropriate professional advisers on all such matters. This eBook is provided as information only.

All trademarks and copyrights acknowledged.

The paperback version of this book was called How to be The One. It sold out. When it was originally published, the book received international media coverage in many magazines including YOU, the UKs largest circulation womens supplement in the Mail on Sunday as well as CNN in the US.

This book is a new approach to dating. Its for men and women of all preferences, persuasions and religions who are looking for a long-term serious relationship with one other person, perhaps after years of fun dating.

So if you want a long-term partner to share your life with, a special relationship based on honesty, kindness, mutual respect, deep intimacy and love, and are prepared to actually do something about it this is for you.

Real, face-to-face dating has been quite challenging since early 2020 as COVID-19 lockdowns throughout the world made it difficult, impossible (or even illegal) to meet any new people. For many single people living on their own, the isolation has been even more challenging. Now with the prospect of a return to some kind of normality around the world, lets all hope that new friendships and deeper relationships can re-start.

For a lot of people, its a re-start in so many other ways too. Perhaps you have decided to re-think your personal and longer-term relationship priorities. I hope this updated book helps you.

A key message throughout this book is a simple one, although its easier to say than do. If you really want a long-term, meaningful relationship with the best, you have to be prepared to put at least some effort into being the best for them too; whether youve yet to meet them or not. In fact, its for anyone who wants to be that one person who brings out the best in a partner, who is in turn, as equally devoted to you.

All too often though, whenever there is any discussion about relationships the focus is invariably on the differences between the sexes. There are so many books, magazine articles, and radio and TV programmes on the subject. Some are downright divisive, driving a deep wedge between the sexes. Only last night while waiting for a train I saw a beautiful young woman. She was reading a particular book which promised to help female readers to become a bitch (because that, apparently, is what men want!) Im guessing that she simply wanted someone to want her. We all do. But being nasty to other human beings is hardly likely to bring lasting happiness to anyone.

Bookshelves groan under the weight of books that explain how to get more dates or offer underhanded, dirty tricks and manipulative techniques readers can use to get their prey to want them more, whether for casual sex or for marriage. Some of these books boast sales in the millions and countless marriages as a result of their rules and deceitful techniques. The authors are less forthcoming about how many of those marriages actually ended in painful divorces for everyone, including countless innocent children.

Techniques to manipulate another individual may indeed work in the short term but any relationship based on this type of behaviour cannot and will not last. How to Be LOVED is not like those books. In these pages you will find hundreds of ways to become, without any manipulation or trickery, the sort of person another genuine man or woman would choose, and want to keep as a lifelong partner.

As were explore in more detail later, looking hot or cool is certainly exciting. However, being warm can appear boring by comparison. Yet, its shared warmth in a relationship that gives it longevity.

Invariably, when relationships break down, its the warmth that is lost; replaced by an intensely cold shield thats designed to offer protection from emotional pain. Cold determination not to get hurt is often the priority. Sadly, it doesnt always work.

So, in a gender-neutral way, lets concentrate on the similarities and shared relationship aspirations of men and women of all ages and backgrounds. It has therefore been created following extensive collaboration with a team of men and women, both single and married. Rather than taking a group of women into a room and men into another and then talking to them separately about what the other sex doesnt understand or consistently fails to get right, please think of this book as the equivalent of bringing men and women together into the same room, and discussing together how each gender can better understand the needs, fears and dreams of the other.

Doing this, it is hoped that everyone can gain more clarity about what men and women look for in a long-term partner, and what YOU can do to become that person, whether for your existing partner, or for that special someone you have yet to meet. You may also become a far more appealing person to yourself. How to Be LOVED is therefore very definitely for men AND women.

If youre currently single, use this time to get yourself ready for the time when you meet that special person.

If youre in a relationship, please read it together and use it as the basis for discussions about how you can become closer.

Either way, think of it as part of your relationship personal development programme. Make notes if your eBook device allows you to do so. Or use a separate notepad. Answer the questions. Do the exercises. Do whatever it takes to absorb the most relevant ideas. A tiny improvement today can have massive and positive effects in the longer term. And when you add together a lot of small improvements the benefits are even greater. A ship that alters its course by only one degree will, over time, end up in a totally different place. So can you. And it will be a better place.

We all seem to know what we need to do, but we dont do even the basics? In many cases the reason is simple we simply forget.

At the end of each Emotional Core section, you will find a series of daily Stop and Start Reminders to help you integrate new thoughts and behaviours into your life. You dont have to do any of them. Really. Because if you agree with any of what you read, and then think and feel its a chore to make adjustments in your behaviour and attitude, you wont do it. You might start with good intentions but it probably wont last. However, if you choose to make the Reminders a part of your future life, you will benefit more from the rest of whats in this book. Many of the ideas are so simple. When taken on their own, they may appear fairly small and insignificant. But add them all together, and apply them over time and they become a powerful and potent way to be far more appealing to others. There is space at the end of each section for you to add any new reminders you can think of. The more you remind yourself to make even small improvements on a daily basis, the more likely it will be that these actions will become new and beneficial habits. Repeated often enough, in time your brain learns to do them unconsciously. They become permanent improvements.