The University Press of Mississippi is the scholarly publishing agency of the Mississippi Institutions of Higher Learning: Alcorn State University, Delta State University, Jackson State University, Mississippi State University, Mississippi University for Women, Mississippi Valley State University, University of Mississippi, and University of Southern Mississippi.
www.upress.state.ms.us
Designed by Peter D. Halverson
The University Press of Mississippi is a member of the Association of University Presses.
Names and identifying details have been changed to protect the privacy of individuals.
Copyright 2020 by University Press of Mississippi
All rights reserved
Manufactured in the United States of America
First printing 2020
Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data
LCCN: 2020931833
Hardback ISBN | 978-1-4968-2911-5 |
Epub single ISBN | 978-1-4968-2912-2 |
Epub institutional ISBN | 978-1-4968-2913-9 |
PDF single ISBN | 978-1-4968-2914-6 |
PDF institutional ISBN | 978-1-4968-2910-8 |
British Library Cataloging-in-Publication Data available
Acknowledgments
When I first considered interviewing same-sex couples in Mississippi, I planned it to be a short-term research project, leading to an article and possibly presentations at my professional conferences. After my initial meetings with couples, though, I realized that the stories contained in the hours and hours of transcripts were too rich to be contained in a journal article. What began as interviews with a few couples led to interviews with couples across Mississippi and over several years. What first began as my proposal to interview research subjects led to a desire to tell the stories of real people whose strength in the face of resistance, passion to make a better place for themselves and future same-sex couples, and love for each other, I admired. This book could not have been possible without their openness to talk to me and their willingness to share their stories.
Throughout the process of writing this book, many people provided me with support and encouragement when I wondered if I could do it. My father, a prolific history writer, listened to my ideas, offered advice, and encouraged me during the ups and downs of the process. As a child growing up, I observed the passion he had for writing and making history come to life for his readers. I often drew on those memories when I wondered if I could endure another major revision of the book. My mother, who has edited my fathers books for years, offered her support throughout the process and proofed an early draft of the book. Since I came out to them at nineteen, they have been allies of me and the LGBTQ community. They treat my husband, Larry, as if he were their fourth son.
The idea to weave my own story into the book originated from reading Love and Loss in Life and Treatment (2013) by my good friend, psychologist Linda Sherby, in which she weaved her own story of love and loss with those of the patients she treated in her psychoanalytic practice. She encouraged me to take the idea and run with it!
As I struggled to come up with a title for the book, I looked at my bookshelf and saw longtime family friend Clyde Williamss edited book of essays that he titled From Behind the Magnolia Curtain: Voices of Mississippi. The title of this book evolved from there.
Our friends Scott Strauss and Roy Adams, who have traveled with Larry and me on vacations, were the photographers at our wedding on Monhegan Island, Maine. As our wedding gift, they gave us a photograph album, from which came the wedding pictures in this book.
Many other friends and colleagues have offered their support and encouragement. Rhonda Neswald-Potter read an early draft and offered suggestions as I struggled to find the best format for the book. Stacee Reicherzer helped me find a transcriptionist and shared her own writing experiences with me. David Capuzzi, past president of the American Counseling Association and prolific author of counselor education textbooks, offered his advice on pursuing publication. My friend Shirley Godios asked me monthly during our telephone coffee talks how the book was coming along, enabling me to vent both my discouragement and excitement, depending on the month. My friend and novelist Deborah Johnson shared her own writing experiences with me and offered advice over many meals at J. Broussards in Columbus, Mississippi.
I want to thank the staff at University Press of Mississippi, especially director Craig Gill, for believing in this project and wanting to pursue publication with me.
Last but definitely not least, my husband, Larry, gave me the space to write, the loving support to see the project through, and a willingness for his story to be in the book.
REFERENCES
Sherby, L. B. (2013). Love and loss in life and treatment. New York: Routledge.
Williams, C. V. (1988). From behind the magnolia curtain: Voices of Mississippi. Jackson, MS: Mississippi Press Association/Mississippi Humanities Council.
COMING OUT OF THE MAGNOLIA CLOSET
Introduction
Im driving down into south Mississippi to interview a gay couple. I exit off the interstate onto a two-lane road and into the woods. The trees come up to the very edge of the road and connect high in the sky, creating the effect of driving through a tunnel. Jeffrey and Leonard, two white men in their sixties, were described by another gay couple in the area as the couple in the woods. I envision a quaint cabin and two bearded, lumberjack-looking men.
When I had spoken to them previously on the phone, Jeffrey and Leonard described several landmarks to guide me to the unmarked drive that leads to their house. I find a dirt road that appears to lead deeper into the woods, but in reality goes through a buffer of trees hiding an open area of green grass and a beautiful one-story house with an inviting front porch. The house looks like it came straight out of a country cottage magazine; its not what I expected to find. Everything is perfectly landscaped, and a gravel path leads into a garden, out of which they both emerge. Jeffrey and Leonard are clean shaven and dressed neatly, in shorts and polo shirts. I rave about the paradise they have created, hidden away in the woods. They take me on a tour of their gardens before leading me into a back door of the house and into their kitchen where the smell of a turkey roasting in the oven greets me. They explain that they have Sunday dinner for any of their friends in the area who want to drop by. No RSVP is necessary. They are beginning to cook the afternoon before. They say that they never know who will show up and invite me to come any Sunday