Crystal Victoria - The Vicious Cycle: A Key to Unlocking the Revolving Door

The Vicious Cycle

A Key to Unlocking the Revolving Door

By: Crystal Victoria

2014 by Crystal Victoria. All rights reserved.

No part of this book may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or

transmitted by any means without the written permission of the author.

ISBN: 13: 978-1-943240-00-5

Library of Congress Control Number: 2012904697

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Dedication

To the Creator of the universe from whom all blessings flow. Thank you for blessing us all with divine gifts so that we may serve you and be of service to each other.

To my mother: Thank you for enduring the struggles and loving me anyway in spite of my wayward behavior and mistakes. Without you I wouldnt have made it, and Im so grateful that you stood the test of faith so that I could be here to write this book for all the families going through this same hardship weve overcome. For all the years youve asked questions, I hope that in this book you find some answers.

To parents and families of loved ones in The Vicious Cycle: I pray this answers some of your questions about your loved ones and that through this book you see how you can truly help them turn their lives around.

To the people whove been caught in The Vicious Cycle: In these pages is the way out and the path to a better life. It doesnt hurt to try it, if not for yourself, do it for those who love you. I hope you identify with some of the scenarios and the truth about yourself and this situation.

To the generations of children growing up in our society today: This situation is real life, and my sincere hope for you is that you do not allow this cycle to continue. May this book help you make the right decisions and inspire you to lend a helping hand to those who are lost and struggling in their journey of life.

May we each be inspired to love and be of service to one another as God loves and serves us. It is done.

Table of Contents

Chapter 1: Reality Stinks

Chapter 2: Family Gives Up

Chapter 3: How Do I Survive?

Chapter 4: The Negative Mindset

Chapter 5: The World Kept Spinning

Chapter 6: Readjusting to Freedom

Prologue

In and out, in and out. Some people just cannot seem to stop the madness. A rare form of insanity; however, its not so rare. In fact, its more prevalent than we realize, and its roots reach deeper than most people understand.

Who on earth wants to be in and out of jail his or her entire life? Isnt once enough?

Honestly, not for some.

Why? Well, its complicated, but the reality is that jail is the easy way out.

No one really plans it, but after you go a few times its not all that scary. Its kind of like dying. When you die, you have no worries. Your only fear is the transition or anxiety about how youre going to die. In jail, you dont have too many worries, either. Youre just worried about how long youll be there, and after being in jail a couple of times, the thought of going stops bothering you.

Worrying in jail will drive you crazy and makes it extra hard to do time. Once you get a grasp of the fact there is nothing you can do, the mind begins to block out most fears of normal life.

Lets face itgoing to jail was probably the biggest fear in the first place. After a few days, youve conquered the fear of the terrible cement place with bars and black and white jumpsuits attached to a ball and chain of which there is no escape. Committing crimes becomes easier once youve conquered that fear. Staying free becomes harder and harder.

Two-thirds of released prisoners are rearrested and one-half are re-incarcerated within three years of release from prison (Langan and Levin, 2002). Rates of recidivism necessarily rise thereafter, so that upwards of 75 percent to 80 percent of released prisoners are likely to be rearrested within a decade of release.

For many men aged 2040, the prison door is a revolving one. Commit serious crime, get arrested and incarcerated, spend some time in prison, get out, commit more crimes get arrested and incarcerated, and so on. Fifty-six percent of state prisoners released in 1999 had one or more prior convictions, and 25 percent had three or more convictions. Not until men reach their mid-forties does the rate of rearrests fall noticeably.

Is there a cure for this rare form of insanity, which some equate with stupidity? Yes, there is hope. The bad news is that it takes time. My purpose in writing this is to help speed up the process.

The first step to conquering any problem is acknowledging there is one. Know thyself, reader, KNOW THYSELF!

Why should you listen to me, you might ask? Fair enough. So heres how it is. There was a time in my life when I experienced this sort of behavior. In and out, over and over again until I began getting dizzy spinning on that merry-go round. One day I stopped and staggered off, still dizzy from spinning for so long. Like a drunk, I stumbled left and right almost losing my balance a few times trying to regain control of my life. One of the things that kept throwing me off balance was my anger.

I think in some cases the thing that kept me captive in anger was trying to fix things Id done or make it up to others only to realize that no matter what I did, there was no way of repaying the debts. No amount of money or material things could negate the fact that Id been absent from someones life or played a part in someones misery.

In my first book, From the Streets to the Skies No Limits, I wrote about guilt and shame as deadly combinations. Never feel guilty, never feel ashamed. Maybe remorseful, but we all make mistakes and do things we are not proud of. It is all a learning experience, and at some point we must take responsibility for our lives and mistakes, even if those mistakes seemed to be truly out of our control.

This is not to excuse anyones behavior, but theres no point in committing mental suicide when already being punished physically and restricted to a cell, alone, and away from family and friends.

Enough is enough. Stop it. This same energy spent feeling remorse can be better directed to recreating ourselves and our lives, which can get us out of this mess.

So what exactly is this mess again? Its called the vicious cycle and it defines the revolving door of jails, prisons, and institutions. But there is a way out, and its not easy. It isnt nearly as quick as we might wish it to be, and sometimes some of the mess clings to us for a little while. However, who wants to live in a downward spiral when there is a way out of it?

And there IS a way. Stick with me, and I will show you what it is.

Chapter 1: Reality Stinks

The reality is that all the time spent locked up was wasted. It may have saved a life or two, in which case it was time well spent, but most of the time, for most people, being locked up is a waste of existence. So much can take place in six months to a year or even in a couple of days.

For those locked up, this time is nothing but seconds on a clock. Tick-tock tick-tock tick playing dominoes, working out, eating, watching TV, writing letters, sleeping, sleeping, sleeping, and sleeping some more. In some cases people behind bars work or attend classes of some kind. And some people go to church daily, since thats available. They come out of jail or prison with new skills and new beliefs that help them avoid the vicious cycle. For some people, once is enough, but we are NOT talking about them.