Kenn Bivins - 39 Lessons for Girls

39 Lessons for Girls by Kenn Bivins - - - - - for nori It is easier to build strong children than to repair broken women.
Frederick Douglass, paraphrased by Kenn Bivins love & laugh forever The legacy of a father is what he leaves in his stead for his children and those who have been in the shadow of his influence. I love my goddaughter and the following are 39 lessons or snippets of wisdom I hope to teach her as she matures into a young lady. If you have a daughter, niece, mentee or girl in your life, you may benefit from this addendum to what youre already teaching. This is not a comprehensive list, but more so a foundation to build upon. love and laugh forever, Kenn Bivins You are good enough - - - - Your value is not implied by what any other person thinks or says of you.

You dont have to be a princess to be precious - - - - Many fables and fantasies have given girls the impression they have to be royalty to be considered special. Youre special whether you want to be a princess or not. Stop trying so hard to fit in - - - - You were made to stand out. There is a God - - - - Acknowledging that there is a being greater than yourself, creates a sense of purpose and humility that fuels endless curiosity, seeking and learning. You are not Him (or Her) - - - - Be humble. Youre awesome, but youre not God, so dont judge others.

Instead, offer others the same grace youve been given because none of us are perfect. Dont be a mean girl - - - - Be kind to others in the same way you want others to be kind to you. Give no regard to the actual mean girl. Dont let her energy define yours. A princess eventually becomes a queen - - - - All things full of life will grow and become something greater today than yesterday. God intended you - - - - God intentionally made you.

Youre as original as a snowflake or fingerprint. Your glory is your difference. Be you. Your best accessory is your smile - - - - The mirror, the masses and I say so. But you dont have to smile if you dont want to - - - - While others benefit from seeing you smile, no one can make you do so. Your smile and the rest of your body belongs to you.

Do with it what you choose. Be heard - - - - Your voice, your presence and your influence matters. Dont be afraid to speak up. Be quiet - - - - Listen to others. There will be times where you will gain much more knowledge by simply listening and observing. Cant never could - - - - Believe I can more than you fear I cant.

Failure is not final - - - - A major ingredient of success is failing. Learn from your mistakes and missteps. Allow them to fuel you toward success. Never never never give up - - - - Never. Dont run with the crowd unless youre the leader - - - - Lead, aspire to lead or, while youre following, learn to lead. Youre not her, but shes not You - - - - While you wish you were someone else, someone else is wishing she were you.

Dont envy others. Save - - - - Save your money, your words, your time and your body for the most deserving. Pay attention - - - - Rather than listening to what people say, listen to what they do. Love yourself - - - - Set the standard for how you deserve to be loved by loving the girl in the mirror first. Credit card debt is a brutal master - - - - Use credit to build wealth. He cannot complete you - - - - You are already whole.

Anyone that is added to your life can only be a addendum to the awesome being that you already are. Be a big sister - - - - Whether you have a sibling or not, seek others to nurture and teach. It will enhance your purpose or better inform you of it. Follow your heart, but dont forget to take your brain with you - - - - Give consideration to your feelings because you cant trust them all on their own. Boys/men think completely different than you - - - - Learning of him and how he communicates is essential if you want to truly know him. Get over yourself - - - - Sometimes, its not everyone else who is wrong.

Sometimes its you. Take a step back and take responsibility where it applies. Give thanks - - - - A thankful heart is a humble and happy heart. True education starts where school ends - - - - Schooling is for the sake of demonstrating your aptitude to learn. Once you complete school, that ability is challenged and matured for the rest of your life. Therein true education ensues.

You are addressed according to how you dress - - - - Be mindful of this, especially concerning job interviews and boys. Nothing lasts forever - - - - A bad mood, heartbreak and acne will soon pass. Be patient. Dont wage war - - - - Be careful of the things you say about and to people. Words can deeply hurt and are non-refundable. But be a warrior - - - - You have an innate ability to overcome much.

You are stronger than you think. Not everyone will like you and thats okay - - - - Theres nothing wrong with you just like theres nothing wrong with a sunny day, but some people dont like sunny days. They may prefer it to be cloudy because theyre sensitive to sunlight. Youre like a sunny day. You are not your parents mistakes - - - - Your parents arent perfect. Dont let their mistakes define your identity.

Be your own person and grow in your own sense of self. Dont settle - - - - Dust settles. You shouldnt. Ever. Stand tall - - - - Confidence attracts the best thoughts, the right attitude and the coolest people. Dont doubt yourself - - - - You can do anything you set your mind to.

Taking one step forward is all the persistence, belief and determination you will ever need. Always get there early - - - - When youre early, youre less stressed, youre ready for the unexpected, you get the best seat and youre always on time. Seek God always - - - - Therein youll find your purpose. Other books by Kenn Bivins
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39 Lessons for Black Boys & Girls
39 Lessons for Teens
39 Lessons for Boys
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the Wedding & Disaster of Felona Mabel
Pious
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Sign up to be the first to know when Kenns next book is coming. I am the dad I always wanted. My own father was absent, but I refuse to let that color the type of influence I have with my goddaughter.
Im honored that her mom trusts me enough to play such a significant role in her daughters development.

I must admit I have no clue what Im doing at times, but where Im a novice, God, grace and ice cream with sprinkles cover me. Yes, ice cream with sprinkles. Girls love ice cream with sprinkles.
While being a surrogate dad, Ive pondered what type of woman I envision my goddaughter becoming, which has made me look at women differently. In the next few bonus pages, I want to share some observations I lovingly call 4 Lessons for Big Girls. Bonus 1 be a confidant - - - - If you listen and engage her while shes sharing the small, unimportant things, she is more likely to trust sharing with you the more significant things when they happen. Bonus 2 be consistent - - - - She may not seem like shes paying attention to you, but she is.

She internalizes what you do more than what you say. Bonus 3 be creative - - - - Nourish her creative side. It will help her see the world in new ways while encouraging free-thinking, problem-solving and producing. Bonus 4 be her - - - - Put yourself in her shoes to understand her better. Encourage her where she is while nudging her toward who she might become. the significance of You may be wondering, Whats the deal with 39? Why wasnt this book called 101 Lessons or something like that? 39 is just odd.

Well, let me explain. Years ago when I was blogging regularly, I went through what I lovingly regard as my list phase. Lists are an amazing way to quantify accomplishments, goals, things to do, things that have been done, groceries, etc. I ran across an internet challenge to detail random things about myself and this turned into a post entitled 99 things. This was my inaugural list, but it got so much feedback that I challenged myself further to write another list and then another, each one being a quantity divisible by 3 and ending in 9. Apparently, I was also into numeric themes.