Michelle Douglas - Dont Wear Shoes You Cant Walk In: A Field Guide for Your Twenties

Praise for Dont Wear Shoes You Cant Walk In

a jaunty guide that has plenty of personality. Wise, witty, and worthwhile advice for readers navigating their twenties.

Kirkus Reviews

Brilliantly articulated, perfectly digestible. Dont Wear Shoes You Cant Walk In should be required reading for when anyone turns twenty.

GenTwenty

A manual for navigating new beginnings, no matter your age. Timeless advice paired with relatable learnings to help you uncover your next best step forward.

Natalie Franke, cofounder of The Rising Tide Society and author of Built to Belong

An insightful book from a talented, introspective and passionate writer. I found myself relating to so much of Michelles self-exploration, and I know this will be an impactful read for many others.

Stacy Stahl, founder of How They Asked and Sweeter Cards

An empowering, practical, hands-on guide that will help the twentysomethings in your life create more meaningful, manageable lives.

Kristen Hadeed, Leadership Thought Leader and author of Permission to Screw Up

The handbook I wish Id had throughout my twenties, filled with compassionate guidance from a time-tested big sister who wants you to learn from her experience but also forge your own path every step of the way. Michelle Douglas has an uncanny ability to take lifes deep, nuanced lessons and package them into clever metaphors that will stick with you long after you put this book down.

Caroline Kelso Zook, author of Your Brightest Life Journal

A joyous guidebook... the writing prompts will be helpful to anyone of any age.

Jo Giese, award-winning radio journalist and author of Never Sit If You Can Dance

These are lessons we all need to know to succeed in life but are not taught in school. This book will inspire you to achieve your dreams.

Whitney Holtzman, CEO of Social Victories, NFL Agent, and author of You Are the First You

Douglas offers both practical and sage advice on everything from starting careers, cultivating relationships, and creating an overall balanced life. Dont Wear Shoes You Cant Walk In is a wonderful and useful book for a young person starting out on their own.

Kristen Rademacher, M.Ed. Academic Coach, University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill

TITLE LESSON

Dont wear shoes you cant walk in.

O ver the past ten years, Dont wear shoes you cant walk in is a lesson that has revealed itself to me many times. I first learned it when I borrowed a pair of high heels from a friend for a job interview. The shoes were not only too high for me, but I began to get blisters before I even made it into the building where I was to be interviewed. As I stumbled and shuffled across the threshold into the hiring managers office, I couldnt help but worry that my clear physical discomfort translated to a visible lack of confidence. I didnt get that job, and sometimes I wondered if it was because I didnt put my best foot forward. After all, I could barely put one foot in front of the other. The way we walk says a lot about usnot just our physical presence, but our state of mind. The takeaway here is simple: You should never wear shoes you cant walk in.

Of course, this lesson speaks to more than just literal shoes. Its also about being true to yourself and not trying to be someone you are not. If you are wearing shoes you cant walk in, and thus denying your authentic self, you likely wont make it where youre trying to go.

Its a lesson that sums up so much of the decade that is your twenties. Sometimes people, jobs, and activities wont fit into your life, but youll wish they did. Sometimes other options will look better than what you currently have, but once you obtain them, you realize they arent more desirable at all. Over time, youll learn that reliability is more valuable than glamour and that knowing yourself is the best way to get where youre going. Recognizing and recording the lessons of your life can change your path for the better.

Copyright 2022, Michelle Douglas

All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, distributed, or transmitted in any form or by any means, including photocopying, recording, digital scanning, or other electronic or mechanical methods, without the prior written permission of the publisher, except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical reviews and certain other noncommercial uses permitted by copyright law. For permission requests, please address She Writes Press.

Published 2022

Printed in the United States of America

Print ISBN: 978-1-64742-320-9

E-ISBN: 978-1-64742-321-6

Library of Congress Control Number: 2021918921

For information, address:

She Writes Press

1569 Solano Ave #546

Berkeley, CA 94707

She Writes Press is a division of SparkPoint Studio, LLC.

To Adelaide

This was written for you, even before I knew you.

Keep taking big steps.

INTRODUCTION

L ife in your early twenties can be confusing and uncertain. Its an exciting time that can also feel chaotic, filled with new adventures, relationships, and emotions. The next ten years are formidable years and, in this time, you will find yourself encountering new situations and thinking some of these thoughts: Can I survive in a city where I only know one person? How do I find purpose outside of work? Is it okay to date more than one person in the same week? Am I successful? How do I even define success?

Its time to ensure that the years to come are everything you want them to be. Free of confusion and chaos, rich in meaningful relationships, satisfying to the soul, and full of opportunity for joy and growth. But how will you find your way? Imagine if you had advice from someone who has experienced what you are about to go throughmoving, working, loving, losing, quitting, building, and all the while maintaining a strong sense of self.

If you are a recent college graduate, new city transplant, career shifter, or anyone on the journey that is being a twentysomething, youve opened the right book. The pages that follow offer relatable advice in the areas of work, love, practical adult life, and personal growth. Going beyond advice alone, this book provides the opportunity to explore yourself with prompts at the end of each chapter for you to answer, revealing the insights and wisdom youve already gained but might not realize you possess. Ultimately, this book aims to disrupt the routines of your daily life with a new filter placed on interactions and activities, one that will inspire you to ask on a regular basis, Why is this moment happening in my life and what can I learn from it?

In 2010, when I graduated from college and moved to a new city for work, I found myself asking the same questions. I knew this would be not only a time Id want to remember, but also one where I wished I had a guide. So I wanted to create one for my future children. I committed to the practice of writing down one thing I learned every day that year. Since then, Ive recorded my thoughts, my days, and the important lessons that life taught and brought me as I began to fully explore my life and learn its strengths, weaknesses, and most importantly, its cycles. These lessons now exist in six volumes of black leather Moleskine journals, and I consider them to be among my most prized possessions and one of the greatest things Ive ever done for myself. Whether you decide to make it a journal, a note on your phone, or a running document on your computer, I encourage you to take inventory of your own life. Reflecting on each day as it happens and learning from it changes the way you view and approach the next day and every day after that.