Daniel Chidiac - The Modern Break-Up

The Modern Break-Up

Copyright 2019 by Daniel Chidiac. All rights reserved.

No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system or transmitted in any way by any means, electronic, mechanical, photocopy, recording or otherwise without the prior permission of the author except as provided by USA copyright law.

First published by Undercover Publishing House.

ISBN: 978-0-9871665-5-5

This book is dedicated to life.

Daniel Chidiac

CONTENTS

ENDLESS KNOT

Her eyes opened slowly and then closed again. She hadnt yet processed that she was in a place that was unfamiliar to her. But as she took another glimpse, fear suddenly took over her like a child being locked in a dark room. Her body froze; her mind raced.

Lying on a dirt path a few feet wide and only wearing a white dress, she was cold and alone. There were two high walls on either side of her that went as far as she could see. They were made of thick, dry branches. Nothing was visible through them. They blocked her in. The sky was gray, dulling everything beneath it. There was no life here, no sound, no color. She quickly stood up and walked around in a daze. Where am I?

Frantically trying to find a way out, she tried escaping through the walls. With every failed attempt, the sharp branches cut her. She ran and ran and ran as fast as she could. As she got to the end of the path, she noticed similar paths to her left and right. She turned left. Getting to the end of that path, something dawned on her she had been here before. She was in the maze.

It wasnt exactly how she remembered it. Once luscious and full of life, people would hold hands and laugh. Now it was abandoned, silent. She tried to remember how she got out last time, but her memory failed her.

Help! Help! Someone, please help me! she yelled in desperation and fell to her knees. Scared for her life, not knowing what her future held, she sobbed uncontrollably. Her tears splashed on the ground, giving it the only bit of moisture it had had in months. After a few minutes, the suns rays started to warm her face. There wasnt much cracking through the dense clouds, but it was enough to give her hope. She had to get up

As she wiped her cheeks dry and composed herself, she saw what seemed to be a light at the end of yet another path. She sprinted toward it. To her, that light seemed like the only option. Getting closer, a figure started to appear. It was radiating. She finally arrived and saw who it was.

Oh, thank God. I knew youd come to save me. Ive been scared for my life. What the hell are we doing here? Where have you been?

He didnt answer, just smiled, as his hands remained behind his back.

What are you holding? she asked.

Again, he didnt answer. Looking innocently into her eyes, he revealed what hed been hiding and gifted her a bunch of bright red roses. It was the only real color she had seen so far.

Thank you, she said, accepting his gift. She closed her eyes and relished in the soft petals as they rubbed lightly against the tip of her nose. The scent was so beautiful, so fresh that for a moment she forgot where she was.

With her eyes still closed, she heard a quiet hiss. A snake slithered up from within the roses. Just as she went to drop them, it sprung up and bit her, the fangs clenching firmly on her lips.

Screaming in shock, she pulled it off with all her strength and threw it to the ground. She frantically screamed at him, Why? Why? and began beating on his chest. With every hit, a hollow sound rang out and his radiance left. Eventually, stiff, lifeless, like an empty statue, he fell over.

She ran for her life. With every stride, she could feel the pain of the dry path on the soles of her bare feet. Still running as fast she could, she looked back to see if danger was following her. Not seeing where she was running, she smashed into something and fell to the ground. Everything went blank. A few minutes passed.

She slowly stood up and noticed that it was a gigantic mirror as wide as the path that had stopped her in her tracks. There was no getting past it. She had to face it. She just stared at herself, and what she saw consumed every part of her being. The bite from the gift had deformed her face.

Youre so ugly compared to them. Look at you. No wonder he doesnt want you! she yelled at herself in the mirror. As she continued, a quote appeared on the glass:

Sometimes, where pure light is perceived, darkness lingers.

Not being able to ease the voices in her head, she gave in to rage. She smashed the mirror with her fist; blood poured down from her knuckles. Looking to the sky, she let out one last cry and fell into the darkness of her mind.

THAT GUY

Hes so hot, Zara said as she took a sip of her espresso martini.

Who? I asked.

The one near the bar with the white shirt on. But dont look yet. I dont want to make it obvious. In a minute, just pretend youre looking around and have a quick look.

Dont be so stupid. Im looking now, I said.

Zara quickly grabbed my arm. Can you not!

I tried not to get under her skin, so I ridiculously looked around the bar in an effort to disguise my curiosity.

I think I just saw him. There were three guys with white on. Which one? I asked.

Zara moved into a different position for me to have another subtle look. Are you serious? Ones fat, the other looks like his face has been hit with a baseball bat. The gorgeous one, Amelia, obviously, she said in her judgmental but honest tone.

Okay, calm down.

Well?

Yeah, hes beautiful. He looks European or something, I said.

All I could see was a guy who looked like he didnt care whether he would ever speak to me or not. Just by the way he was leaning on the bar, he looked confident enough to make me feel insecure. But rather than deterring me, it made me even more curious. I almost had this feeling like I had to try to equal his energy, and the only way I could do that was by not giving him the attention he probably always got. I needed to play it cool.

Weird things happen to me when Im faced with a guy Im really attracted to. I feel like I have to prove that Im not desperate. Ill control how many times I text him and analyze my actions. Usually its not really anything they do that makes my behavior change; its me. I get nervous. I almost always do something that makes me look like a psycho. And sometimes, because I know Im going to screw it up, I stop communication before I can. They probably think I avoid them because Im not interested, but sometimes its because Im so intimidated that being myself goes out the window. In a perfect world, I would act with the guys Im attracted to the way I do with guys I dont really care about.

Theres something great about not being genuinely interested. Because then I have more power within myself. Im not vulnerable. I can stay who I am and think clearly. When Im too attracted, I lose all of that. I lose control. I couldnt tell you how many times I have sworn that I wont give a guy more of my attention than he deserves. But sure enough, someone comes along that makes me a hypocrite. And I always kick myself for it. Sometimes I question, if were really interested in someonetoo interested, maybecan we act like were not, or are we doomed as soon as our mind even plays around with the idea that they are better than I am?

From across the bar, I saw that guy smile at his friend in conversation. I nearly died Im a massive sucker for a nice smile. His white sneakers, frayed light blue jeans, and slightly unbuttoned linen white shirt all just worked. Im no fashion guru, but I know when I see a guy who knows what hes doing. There were other guys in the bar who looked nice but too put together, too pretty. Not to mention they looked like they had spent more time doing their hair than I did. This guy had scruffy, dark-blondish hair. Bed hair but hot. He just seemed to look that way with no effort. His sleeves were rolled up loosely above his wrist and his shirt hung perfectly. I snuck as many glances as I could while pretending to look back and forth at the DJ not far behind him. My mind started to race I wonder if hes seen me look at him. His tan is so sexy. I think hes from overseas.