Tingle - The Art Of The Tingle: Volume 3

THE ART OF THE TINGLE

Volume 3

By Chuck Tingle

DEDICATION

This book is dedicated to all who make this timeline a better place by proving love with their unique trot. Nobody can trot like you can, and this fact is so powerful and important. Never forget how meaningful you are to this timeline.

ACKNOWLEDGMENTS

Thank you Klowy. She is right; cashew chocolate milk is pretty dang good.

No thanks to Ted Cobbler, he is a devil.

DINOSAUR TINGLERS

DOMALD TROMP POUNDED IN THE BUTT BY THE HANDSOME RUSSIAN T-REX WHO ALSO PEED ON HIS BUTT AND THEN BLACKMAILED HIM WITH THE VIDEOS OF HIS BUTT GETTING PEED ON

Millionaire real estate tycoon Domald Tromp was born into wealth and, because of this, hes grown thirsty for something more from life; something a little darker, a little weirder, a little more taboo. To satiate these cravings of the forbidden, Domald has embarked on one of his usual trips to Russian. Little does he know that this particular vacation will change his life forever.

Followed around by a camera crew from the Buttz Carlton Hotel, Domald turns Moscow upside down; sampling some illegal unicorn horn cuisine and hiring a handsome gay T-Rex prostitute. But when Domald suggests the handsome dinosaur pee on his butt, a political scandal begins to unfold unlike anything in the history of hardcore anal pounding!

This erotic tale is 4,300 words of sizzling human on gay Russian dinosaur prostitute action, including anal, blowjobs, cream pies, rough sex, facials, watersports and corrupt political figure love.

Check this out, I announce to the camera, then hold the spoon of unicorn horn under my nose. Without hesitation, I take a huge sniff of the highly illegal substance, its magical power immediately hitting me like a punch in the face. I fall back into my chair and let out a long, satisfied moan, my eyes rolling up into my skull as my toes curl.

Hows it feel? asks the cameraman.

Like ten chocolate milks boiled down into one tiny spoonful, I groan, pulling myself back up after the sensation finally passes

SLAMMED IN THE BUTT BY THE PREHISTORIC MEGALODON SHARK AMID ACCUSATIONS OF JUMPING OVER HIM

After Morn Mince has a little too much chocolate milk at dinner, he suddenly finds himself waking up with a splitting headache and no recollection of what happened the night before. Unfortunately, the last place he remembers heading was towards the waterfront, and the daily news has reports of an unknown man repeatedly jumping over a prehistoric Megalodon shark in the bay (which was funny at first, but now the jump is getting old).

Suddenly a wanted man, Morn heads down to talk to the ancient Carcharodon Megalodon himself, a handsome brain surgeon sea beast named Perks Yono. At first, Morn is simply trying to avoid the standard shark jumping punishment of cultural exile, but soon enough him and Dr. Yono begin to realize that what defines a jump is in the eye, and butt, of the beholder. Of course, all of this culminates in a hardcore anal pounding that will shake you to your very core.

This erotic tale is 4,300 words of sizzling human on gay Carcharodon Megalodon brain surgeon action, including anal, blowjobs, cream pies, rough sex, shark jumping and prehistoric sea creature love.

In the water next to me, a massive Megalodon head has emerged, staring at me with his enormous black eyes that shine like dark hubcaps.

Are you the ambulance boat? the prehistoric shark asks, gnashing his rows of seemingly endless, razor-sharp teeth.

What? I question, not even sure where to begin.

The ambulance boat, the monstrous sea beast repeats. Im meeting one here for a drop off. Theyve got a patient onboard.

Youre a doctor? I suddenly question.

The Megalodon nods. Brain surgeon.

BUTT BUTT LAND: RYAN GOSLINS AND THE CITY OF BUTTS

Feeling defeated after a particularly bad meeting with his writing agent, Horpin finds himself wandering home through Hollywood, the city of butts. Life is hard when youre living in a musical, especially when all you want to write is erotica, and Horpin has learned this the hard way.

But when Horpin hears a beautiful song drifting out from inside a nearby jazz club, he has no idea that his life is about to change forever. Soon enough, Horpin finds himself on a runaway romance with Ryan Goslins, a bad boy musician T-Rex who is about to show him that musicals and butt pounding can coexist.

Now locked in the troughs of passion, Horpin and Ryan are about to show Hollywood that love between a dinosaur and a man is as real as it gets, with a show stopping dance number that will have you hard as rocks and begging for more.

This erotic tale is 4,100 words of sizzling human on handsome T-Rex pianist action, including anal, blowjobs, cream pies, rough sex, and gay prehistoric musical love.

City of butts, the T-Rex sings, are you trotting just for me?

I am completely entranced by his beautiful, prehistoric voice, my eyes locked onto the handsome dinosaur as music floods my ears.

City of butts, theres a buckaroo for me, the T-Rex continues crooning. Who knows? I felt it from the first horseplay with you, that now our loves been proved.

The dinosaur continues like this for a while, the lyrics flowing over me like waves of sentimental bliss. As Ive made perfectly clear, Im more than a little burned out on my life in a musical, but I cant deny that this song is something truly special.

OPEN WIDE FOR THE HANDSOME SABERTOOTH DENTIST WHO IS ALSO A GHOST

Meepers mysterious tooth pain is ruining his life, and the most frustrating part is that nobody seems to have any idea whats causing it. After his second failed trip to the dentist, Meeper feels like all hope is lost, but when he spots a billboard for Sabertooth Dentistry, it seems like his prayers have been answered.

However, it quickly becomes apparent that Sabertooth Dentistry is more than it appears. With a bevy of handsome shirtless dental assistants, and a sabertooth tiger holding a dark secret, Meeper is quickly drawn into a world where a pain in the mouth can only be corrected by a pound in the butt!

This erotic tale is 4,200 words of sizzling human on handsome prehistoric dentist, including anal, blowjobs, facials, rough sex, and gay Sabertooth ghost love.

Dr. Tooth turns off his flashlight. You say youre brushing every morning and night?

I nod.

Flossing, too? questions the dentist.

I shake my head. Not all the time, I admit.

Thats fine thats fine. It wouldnt be causing the problem that we see here, explains Dr. Tooth.

The dentist hesitates for a moment, combing through the filing cabinet of his mind for any kind of solution.

Have you tried having a dick in your mouth? Dr. Tooth asks.

My heart skips a beat as he says this, the arousal that courses through my veins surging hard and causing me to become fully erect. No, I havent, I finally admit.

T-REX ANAL WORKOUT

George loves fitness, and unlike the rest of his bodybuilding buddies, he actually enjoys the burn of his daily trips to the gym. Unfortunately, Georges enthusiasm begins to wane when he hits the legendary wall, a physical state where, no matter how hard George tries, he simply cannot make gains.