Table of Contents
MOUNTAINSOFGOLDFOR THE TAKING!
Were rich! Weve finally hit pay dirt with that freaky Book. Real treasure.
You junior Egyptologists seem to have forgotten, lectured Sam, that the authorities usually punished grave robbers by chopping off their hands.
Fred went back to the statues. Oh come on, you chicken. They wont miss a few gold pieces.
I looked at Sam, sitting on his hands. I looked at Fred, digging in a dead persons treasure. Are you both nuts? Fred, get away from that stuff. Sam, get on your feet. We are going to find The Book, find my sister and her cat, and get out of here before
A loud crash echoed in the hallway outside. More lights flickered. An angry voice yelled.
My hands, squeaked Sam, folding them under his armpits.
Yikes, said Fred.
The sound of the voice grew louder.
Theyre headed this way, I whispered. Hide.
THE TIME WARP TRI0
#1: Knights of the Kitchen Table
#2: The Not-So-Jolly Roger
#3: The Good, the Bad, and the Goofy
#4: Your Mother Was a Neanderthal
#5:2095
#6: Tut, Tut
#7: Summer Reading Is Killing Me!
#8: Its All Greek to Me
#9: See You Later, Gladiator
#10: Sam Samurai
#11: Hey Kid, Want to Buy a Bridge?
#12: Viking It and Liking It
#23: Me Oh Maya
#14: Da Wild, Da Crazy, Da Vinci
With special thanks to Catharine Roehrig, Associate Curator, Egyptian Art, Metropolitan Museum of Art.
For the fifth grade Egyptologists of
The Berkeley Carroll School
ONE
I opened the door to my room and saw a terrible scene. A giant woman stood in King Tuts tomb. An even bigger cat crouched just behind it.
Anna! I yelled. What are you doing?
Sam and Fred pushed into the room behind me.
Shes wrecking our ancient Egypt projects, said Fred. He tossed an extra figure out of his diorama. Ms. B. would kill me if she found G. I. Joe in my Making of a Mummy.
Sam picked up another action figure. Im sure shed love Spiderman in my Book of the Dead scroll and Barbie in Joes King Tuts Tomb.
That is not Barbie. Its the goddess Isis, said Anna.
I didnt know Isis wore high heels, I said. And would you please get that stupid cat away from the tomb. Shes licking the burial chamber.
Anna took the cat and her doll and settled them both in her lap.
Cleo is not a stupid cat and she wasnt licking your stupid burial chamber. She was helping Isis stop the evil grave robbers from breaking into the Queen Pharaohs tomb.
You are such a pain, I said. And that shows how much you know about ancient Egypt. Only kings were Pharaohs. They never had women Pharaohs.
I wiped the cat slobber off my model of King Tuts tomb.
Oh yes, they did, said Anna.
Oh no, they didnt, I said, doing my most annoying imitation of Annas voice.
Well, who is this then? said Anna. She opened one of the books on my desk and pointed to a picture.
Sam adjusted his glasses and leaned over to take a closer look. Now thats the goddess Isis. You can tell because she has that thing that looks like a chair on her head. And theres that same throne shape in the hieroglyph next to her. Thats her cartouche signature thing.
Pharaohs are usually depicted wearing the white crown of Upper Egypt and/or the red crown of Lower Egypt, said Fred in his fake teacher voice. He flipped up the bill of his baseball cap. Only the most awesome Pharaohs wore the Blue Jay crown of Toronto.
But I saw a picture of a woman wearing the two Pharaoh crowns, said Anna.
Ill bet you your weeks allowance you didnt, I said.
Ill bet you I did, said Anna, putting Cleo down and looking through the pile of Egypt books.
And you have to clean the kitty litter for my week, too, I added.
Sam drew a few more teeth on the figure of the Devourer in the Weighing of the Heart scene in his scroll, then stood back to admire all three projects.
Congratulations Trio, said Sam. Here we have three excellent projects on ancient Egypt, finished one whole day before they are due, and nobody even mentioned using a certain Book to help us with our research.
Fred turned his Blue Jays cap inside out and balanced it upside down on his head. We must be getting smart.
I wouldnt go that far, said Sam.
Im still time-lagged from our last adventure, I said. Plus, I promised I wouldnt use The Book again until Ive figured out every tip and rule in there.
Aha! yelled Anna. Here it is.
Cleo jumped on the desk and rubbed her cheek on the book Anna held.
I found it. A picture of a lady wearing both crowns. Anna held up a thin blue book with twisting silver designs.
A faint green mist began to form on the sugar-cube steps of King Tuts tomb.
No! screamed Fred, Sam, and I in unison. Fred and I dove for The Book. Sam dove for the door. We met in mid-jump and ended up in a pile on the floor.
Yes it is, said Anna. She scratched Cleos head and studied the picture in The Book. See theres the white crown
I dont want to be a mummy, moaned Sam in the gathering green cloud.
and theres the red crown.
A flower of dense green fog bloomed and covered Book, sister, and cat.
Here we go again, said Fred.
Then the fog swallowed us, and we were gone.
TWO
Now before things get out of hand (and you know they will as soon as we land), Id like to take a minute to explain a few things.
First of allI had no idea what I was getting into when my uncle Joe gave me The Book for my birthday. It turns out that this is no ordinary book. This thing is a time machine. Every time we open it, it takes us to a different time. Which sounds like great fun. But there is one little problem. The only way to get back to our time is to find The Book in the other time. And whenever we time travel, The Book has a nasty habit of disappearing.
Weve gotten in trouble looking for The Book in King Arthurs court, on Blackbeards pirate ship, in a stone-age cave, and in places you dont even want to know about.
So you would think by now we would have figured out how to use The Book without losing it. Well ... we havent. And if youve got any bright ideas of what we should dokeep them to yourself.
Sorry if I sound a little cranky. But this disappearing Book thing is starting to get on my nerves. I swore to Sam and Fred that I would figure out The Book
