Steve Bodansky - Orgasm Matters

Orgasm
Matters

Orgasm Matters
Copyright 2021 by Steven Bodansky, PhD
All rights reserved under the Pan-American and International Copyright Conventions. This book may not be reproduced in whole or in part, except for brief quotations embodied in critical articles or reviews, in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, or by any information storage and retrieval system now known or hereinafter invented, without written permission of the publisher, Wild Pansy Press, an imprint of
Armin Lear Press.
For further information, contact:

Armin Lear Press
825 Wildlife
Estes Park, CO 80517
ISBN: 978-1-7362988-7-9

Orgasm
Matters

Steven Bodansky, PhD

For Vera
My Muse My Mojo My Magic

Contents

Authors Note on Pronouns

This book is for all couples, but the primary emphasis on women and womens pleasure. For that reason, I recommend it primarily for heterosexual couples and lesbians. A lot of information would be useful to gay men, but this is probably not your main book on sexual pleasureexcept for the in-depth discussions on communication and prolonging male orgasm.

As for the pronouns, I try to use he and she when referring to experiences specifically associated with penis and clitoris or vagina. However, I often use they to refer to a singular person because the individual could be he, or she, or any gender preference. In short, dont judge my choice of pronouns. Enjoy the information and use it to enhance your pleasure no matter if it involves he, she, or them.

Introduction

This is a book about not only the physical aspects of orgasm but about the process of being present mentally and spiritually with orgasm. I will get you coming and going. The potential to feel orgasmic is available to anyone at any time. Seems like a fantastic claim but I will back it up with the rest of this manuscript. I probably grabbed your attention with those words, although you probably are still not feeling orgasmic. Keep reading if you have the desire to feel it. All you have to do is to notice it because it is always there. It is there if you can observe it. You can plug into it at any time. It does take some discipline to do this, especially at first, because of where a persons attention usually turns. That is what is getting in the way: the constant thinking and stream of consciousness, or rather stream of unconscious thoughts, that are running through and cluttering your mind nearly all the time.

Putting your full attention on your body, specifically your genitals, in a positive and affirmative way will translate into orgasmic sensation and pleasure. A lot of the work described here (if you can call it work) is specific techniques that will take your potential orgasm and raise it to a more intense level. The ability to just notice your body and have it feel way pleasurable is a great first step on a journey into an orgasmic filled life situation. That does not mean that you will always want to be feeling orgasmic, but it is a lot simpler and easier than most folks think. The times that you desire to, you will be able to.

Orgasm is being conscious of the pleasure that our bodies can feel. You can also have an orgasm and not be conscious, or have an orgasm that is not totally pleasurable. Of course, you can also have pleasure and have it not be orgasmic. The orgasm that I will be discussing in these pages is of the conscious and pleasurable kindprobably the highest form of pleasure that a human being can feel.

The double entendre of the title of this book Orgasm Matters is perfect for what we will be considering here. The matters that will be studied are subjects and sub-subjects that have been the focus of much of my adult life situation. I dont use the term my life anymore after reading and rereading Eckhart Tolles works, which I thoroughly recommend. According to Tolle, and I agree, we do not have a lifewe are life. We do have life situations however and orgasm has taken center stage in mine. So being that I am under the influence of Tolle and other spiritual masters, I would like to point out here that the words that you will be reading are not the orgasm but point to the orgasm. You still will be responsible for feeling it.

It is not just my own orgasm that has entertained my fancy over the years but those of my wife, Vera, and all the students who have come into my life. After all my years of studying and producing orgasms it still fascinates me. Vera fascinates me. I have written her many love poems, each year of the nearly four decades we have been married.

Everyone has some similarities in how they have an orgasm but the differences in the way that diverse women can experience this phenomenon are phenomenal. Men too have differences in how they feel pleasure, only we have not studied that subject to the same diligent extent. For example, some women can only get off on a light stroke, others only with a firm stroke. Some women can only get off with the aid of a vibrator or only by lying on their belly and humping a pillow and others dont require any touching at all. Some women like Vera have strong abdominal ridging where their whole pelvis is undulating and they feel it all over their body from their head to their toes and even beyond their physical body. Many women especially those who have not allowed themselves to explore their bodies have a more localized response, if at all.

One can objectively notice which orgasm is stronger or more intense than another, but the actual pleasure that the person is feeling is subjective. It is not always so simple to say who is having more fun even though the orgasm may seem more powerful in one person versus another. It does seem to be true that everyone is able to improve his or her abilities to feel pleasure and experience longer and more intense orgasms with practice.

I have written comprehensively on the orgasmic subject for years, yet it seems not thoroughly enough as people still have questions that I feel we may have not covered fully in previous works. That is the reason for this book. Plus, I really get a kick out of writing about this topic. We used to have the expression, The course is for the teachers. The same goes here. The words written are for the writer.

The first chapter in this manuscript is about you guessed it, orgasm. I go into some detail about the different concepts of orgasm and how one can have one instantaneously. I compare the many types of orgasms and the differences between female and male responses. I describe how to divvy up the roles so that one person is totally having their attention on receiving pleasure and their partner is totally focused on giving them pleasure. In order to give someone authentic pleasure, you have to enjoy what you are doing. I also relate how our work is about manual stimulation and the reasons for that.

Even though our expertise is about manual stimulation we get a lot of questions from women on having more fun with intercourse. The second chapter titled Healthy Sex answers those questions as we provide specific information about how women can enjoy intercourse more and what their partners can do to facilitate this. This chapter also includes a section about orgasm in relation to health, both the pros and some of the cons and my personal views on this topic.

I have included in this book a section on self-pleasuring. It is vitally important to know your own body. Then you can communicate your preferences to your partner. If you dont have a partner you still will be able to have a fantastic time. This chapter describes some wonderful techniques to having a party with your pleasure for both men and women, including putting on the lubrication and things that you can do with both hands. I have included a detailed recipe on how to connect your nervous system so that you can have more of a full body orgasm as opposed to just the genitals. There is also information here on connecting the sounds emanating from your throat to your orgasm. There is also a section on fantasy, which is further explored throughout the book.