Richard Webster - Body Language Quick & Easy

Llewellyn Publications

Woodbury, Minnesota

Copyright Information

Body Language Quick & Easy 2014 by Richard Webster.

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First e-book edition 2014

E-book ISBN: 9780738739847

Book design by Donna Burch

Cover photo: iStockphoto.com/17934078/Neustockimages

Cover design by Kevin R. Brown

Editing by Connie Hill

Interior illustrations Mary Ann Zapalac

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Manufactured in the United States of America

This book is dedicated to the wonderful people at Llewellyn,
past and present. Im grateful to you all for helping,
guiding, and nurturing me through 50 books.
Thank you for making it happen.

Contents

Part One: The Art of Body Language

: Body Language

: Starting at the Top

: From the Neck Down

Part Two: How to Interpret Body Language

: How to Interpret a Combination of Traits

: How to Make a Good Impression

: First Impressions

: The Power of Touch

: Successful Body Language in Business

: The Body Language of Love and Romance

: Body Language for Self-Improvement

: Lies and Deception

: Health and Body Language

As the tongue speaketh to the ear,
so the gesture speaketh to the eye.

KING JAMES 1

INTRODUCTION

We all communicate with each other in a variety of different ways. Talking is the most obvious one, and words, written or spoken, are extremely important. The tone of voice we use can also be interpreted. We also communicate silently with others using our bodies and facial expressions. The way we stand, move, sit, and gesture can be interpreted by others, and they decide what they think about us as a result.

You communicated with others well before you were able to say a single word. In fact, its highly likely you controlled and influenced your parents, and other important people in your life, with your inborn skills at nonverbal communication from almost the time you were born. Consequently, you were an expert at body language well before you learned how to speak.

Imagine youre at a social gathering and meet a number of people for the first time. One of them looks over your shoulder while youre talking to him, and hardly looks at you. Another person makes good eye contact, smiles frequently, and nods his head every now and again as youre talking. Which one is interested in you? The interest of one, and the disinterest of the other, is obvious, yet its likely neither was aware of what their body language was saying, unless one of them was being deliberately rude.

We constantly reveal information about ourselves nonverbally. Within seconds of meeting someone, weve made decisions about the person based on his or her facial expression and body language. The way he stands, holds his head, and positions his arms and legs reveals his thoughts, feelings, and emotions more clearly than any number of words.

Of course, people can make fake gestures in an attempt to conceal how they really feel. However, these are never 100 percent effective, and because of a phenomenon known as leakage, our real feelings will still be visible to anyone who knows what to look for. Some of the elements of the gesture will be missing, as our real feelings will leak through the facade were trying to create.

A common example of this is a fake smile that people display to show others theyre happy. A genuine smile involves the eyes as well as the mouth. As a fake smile doesnt involve the eyes, its easy to recognize. Like most people, Ive said things such as Im fine, when in reality I was feeling the opposite. Despite the words, and the attempt to look as if there was no problem, my real feelings would have been visible to any student of body language. Just recently, someone assured me he had plenty of time, but while he was saying it his fingers were tapping on his desk.

This book is in two parts. The first part covers the art of body language. In this section a variety of gestures are looked at individually. The first chapter covers the many forms of nonverbal communication that can be made using the head and face. Chapters Two and Three cover the rest of the body, from the neck to the feet.

Part Two shows you how to use this information in everyday life. Youll discover how to use body language to make a good first impression, gain rapport with others, and become more likable. It contains chapters that will help you make use of nonverbal techniques in your career, in your love life, and for self-improvement. Youll also learn how to recognize the body language of people who lie or want to deceive you.

Part One

The Art of
Body Language

I speak two languages, Body and English.

MAE WEST

chapter one

BODY LANGUAGE

Your life will change as soon as you start using the secret language of nonverbal communication consciously. It will enhance your professional and social life, and will increase your ability to get on with everyone you meet in your everyday life. Youll be able to read the body language signals of others accurately and be able to use that information to interact and communicate with everyone you deal with more effectively than ever before. Youll find the art of body language easy to learn, and it will improve your life immeasurably.

In 1967, Professor Albert Mehrabian of UCLA conducted two ground breaking studies into verbal and nonverbal messages. They demonstrated that 55 percent of the meaning came from the persons posture, gestures, and facial expressions; 38 percent came from the pitch, tone, and speed of the persons voice; and 7 percent came from the words used. In other words, more than 90 percent of communication comes from nonverbal cues.