50 TIPS TO BUILD YOUR SELF-ESTEEM
Copyright Summersdale Publishers Ltd, 2014
With research by Elanor Clarke
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Contents
Introduction
Self-esteem is a key component to a happy, successful life. Self-esteem is essentially how you feel about yourself in terms of your personal qualities and traits, your skills and abilities. Someone with high self-esteem will focus more on their positive traits and see themselves as a capable and talented individual, whereas someone with low self-esteem will likely feel generally unworthy.
This book provides easy-to-follow tips to help boost your self-esteem and get you feeling good about yourself. If, however, you feel your self-esteem is so low it is strongly affecting your day-to-day life, it is advised that you seek advice from your doctor.
SECTION ONE:
UNDERSTANDING SELF-ESTEEM
To be able to improve a situation, you must first understand it. Knowing what triggers feelings of low self-esteem, and what makes you feel good about yourself and your abilities, is the best place to start from to act upon building your self-esteem.
Talk to friends and family
Sometimes it can be hard to know exactly what is causing our self-esteem to be low and in these cases, one of the best things you can do is speak to a good friend or a family member. If you can vocalise your concerns it may help you to understand where it is coming from, and if the person you choose to confide in knows you well, they may be able to offer you some insight that perhaps you have not been able to identify. Finally, talking is a positive and cathartic action, and simply airing your concerns can make you feel calmer and more ready for coming challenges. Added to that, your friends and family tend to think well of you, and hearing positive remarks from them can be a real boost to your self-confidence.
See your self-esteem grow
When you start your journey towards stronger self-esteem, it can be hard to see what the end result will be. It is easy to be concerned about the 'what ifs' of a situation, and this is where visualisation can help. Sitting in a comfortable chair, in a relaxed position, close your eyes and begin to focus on your breathing. There is no need to breathe more slowly or deeply, just pay attention to your natural breathing patterns. Next, start to build a picture in your head of how you would look and act with high self-esteem. Where are you? Who is with you? Notice the details and enjoy the feeling of confidence and happiness. While you are working on building your self-esteem, take this image with you and see it as something to look forward to.
Write down your worries
Once you have researched self-esteem, and have some idea of the issues and symptoms you are looking out for, it's time to work out what your personal triggers are, and when your self-esteem is at its highest or lowest points. Choose a notebook that reflects your tastes; anything from a simple notepad to an illustrated diary. Having a book which you like the look and feel of will make you more likely to use it. Keep it where you are most likely to use it by the bed, in the kitchen wherever you think you will pick it up and write in it. The act of writing down how you feel at any given time will not only help you keep track of what may cause a bout of low self-esteem, it is also cathartic. Furthermore, the diary gives you something to look back at on days when you feel low, which shows that things can be better.
SECTION TWO:
EAT HEALTHILY, FEEL GREAT
Feeding your body the right foods in the right quantities, and ensuring you include mood-boosting nutrients, is a great way to lift your self-esteem by making you feel healthier on the inside, and helping you look your best on the outside. Use these simple tips to boost your nutrition and your mood.
Getting the balance right
Whilst certain foods are said to help with specific things, such as being good for the heart or digestion, the most important thing to start with is a balanced, healthy diet which incorporates all the major food groups. Once you have ensured that you are getting enough protein, fibre, fat, and plenty of vitamin-rich fruits and vegetables, you have a great starting point for healthy eating, which will make you feel fantastic inside and out. If you are unsure of the foods that are best for optimum health, a web search will provide you with comprehensive lists of which foods are rich in which nutrients, allowing you to plan healthier meals.
Try a low GI for steady energy
You may have heard about the health benefits of a low-GI diet more steady energy levels, less bloating, no sugar cravings all of which can be beneficial for your self-esteem. GI stands for Glycaemic Index; the ranking of carbohydrate-containing foods based on their overall effect on blood glucose levels. When we eat foods with a high GI, such as white bread, pastries and sweets, our blood sugar spikes and then drops rapidly, leaving us tired, irritable and hungry. Eating low-GI foods such as beans, rye breads and most fruit and veg helps to ensure your body is fuelled throughout the day and night, leaving you feeling more balanced.
Pep up with protein
As well as being essential for building muscle, protein is important for managing hunger levels and for improving mood. Proteins are made up of amino acids; the essential building blocks from which our body produces almost everything. In particular, the amino acids tryptophan and phenylalanine are great for the mood, as they are used in the production of the neurotransmitters serotonin, dopamine and adrenaline. These three hormones help you to feel happier and more motivated naturally.
Be fat friendly
When trying to eat healthily, it can be easy to see fat as the enemy. Many 'healthy' products are marketed as low fat or fat-free, and we are led to believe that eating fat makes you fat. This is, however, not entirely true. Fats are an important part of your diet. They are key in neurotransmitter production due to the amino acids they contain, and unsaturated fats are important for healthy skin and hair. As long as you get the balance right and are eating enough monounsaturated and polyunsaturated fats, such as those found in olive oil and seeds, and you are reducing the amount of saturated fat you consume, for example the fats in butter, cheese and red meat, you can begin to benefit physically, and the positive changes in your appearance and general health can give you a boost emotionally.
