Noble - The noble art of seducing women: my foolproof guide to pulling any woman you want

Saturday night out with the girls. We hadnt seen each other for a few months. Id been away on a particularly long summer break, and I was eager to see them all again. Wed been friends since college; over the space of a few years wed cried on each others shoulders when relationships had gone sour, wed argued over everything and anything, but we always made up by admitting that we were wrong. We helped each other in our hours of need and shared laughter, holidays and birthdays. In that time wed grown from girls to adult women.

Here we all were, still friends and celebrating the fact that through thick and thin, laughter and tears we remained close.

It was a typical busy Saturday night in London; we were sipping cocktails at one of the most fashionable clubs of the moment. The London party scene was out in full force: beautiful people; famous people; cool people; strange people; rich people; people who wanted to be rich; people who wanted to be famous. And then there were people just out to enjoy life, exactly like we were doing.

We were attracting plenty of male attention and, as a result of that and some lethal cocktails, our egos were getting bigger and bigger.

Men were sending us bottles of champagne; some were brave enough to come over to speak, some tried to dance with us, but all were sent back to their tables with tails firmly between their legs. We even turned down two fairly well-known celebrities, who were particularly annoyed with us for not falling at their feet like most women immediately did.

The thing was, we didnt care. We were on a high, enjoying being together, laughing at the attention we were receiving, and besides two out of the five of us had boyfriends.

I, however, did not. But I did have my eye on someone at work, in fact I was a little transfixed by him. Any man who spoke to me was automatically and unfavourably compared to him. I remember feeling the need to make a phone call, maybe to check up on him or to shamelessly remind him how much I liked him.

I went outside where it was quieter; it was a particularly pleasant warm night. Perhaps fortunately for me, his phone was off and all I got was his answer machine. His cute voice came on and made me feel warm inside. I left a message on his voicemail and closed shut the phone. As I was about to turn and go back inside the club, I heard a voice from behind me.

Why are you speaking so loudly?

I turned around to see a rather ordinary looking guy leaning back in a relaxed manner, with his foot up on the wall behind him. He was kind of cute, but a little short for my liking; his clothes were a bit too casual for my taste too.

Excuse me? I replied, feeling sure hed made a mistake and thought I was one of his friends.

He took a drag from his cigarette and looked into my eyes defiantly.

Youre speaking very loudly, when theres no noise around you. Just thought it was a bit eccentric, thats all. He smiled.

Yes, sometimes I speak loudly. So what? I retaliated, looking him up and down in an authoritative manner. But he was right. There was no noise.

You and your friends have been speaking really loudly all night, thats probably why youre still shouting. Dont worry about it, he laughed.

Im not worried about it! I fired back, getting annoyed with him. I began to search for a cigarette in my bag. I wanted to go but, for some reason, I stayed, probably because I didnt want to seem like I was running scared from him or his remarks.

He came over and lit my cigarette.

Thanks, I mumbled. I wanted to tell him not to bother, but realised as usual that I had no lighter.

Youre welcome. He smiled, returning to his original position.

Whos your friend? he asked

Which one?

The one that all the guys like, he replied, taking another drag from his cigarette.

My mind began to race. We were all getting attention. Who was he talking about? I began to feel jealous, which soured my mood.

The one in the blue dress, he said, noticing my apparent confusion.

Christina? I replied.

Is that her name?

I began to feel jealous toward Christina. It wasnt anything major, just a pang of mild envy, but Id never felt anything like that before about her. I didnt like it at all, she was a dear friend of mine, a great girl, but for some reason I resented the fact that she was apparently getting more attention than the rest of us.

Then I realised that this guy may have been winding me up, so I played along.

Well, I can introduce you to her if you like, I responded.

Thats okay, I can introduce myself if I really want. Im Leo, by the way. He put his hand out to mine. I accepted his handshake.

Im Kezia.

He began laughing.

What? I said, getting increasingly annoyed with him.

If I tell you, will you promise to not be offended?

Promise. Now, whats so funny?

Its beautiful, but when I was a kid I can remember that my friend had a hamster with a very similar name something like Kezla, or Keza.

Although I tried not to, I couldnt help but laugh. My guard had come down.

He took the last drag of his cigarette and rubbed my arm gently, before leaving me standing on my own.

Ill catch you inside the club later, he said, before turning back and mouthing the words, And stop speaking so fucking loudly!

I stood there with my phone still in my hand, wondering what had just happened. How had I been made to experience so many emotions within just a few minutes by a complete stranger who was not my type and was also, frankly, a little too cheeky?

My thoughts were interrupted by the ringing of my phone. It was the guy I had been trying to call before this whole episode. I didnt answer, figuring he could wait for a bit. Isnt it funny how what we consider important can change in just a couple of minutes?

Back in the club, I began discreetly watching my friend Christina and the men all around us. Are they really looking just at her? I asked myself.

I began looking for Leo too. I was curious to know where he was, who he was with, but he was nowhere to be seen.

I did, however, notice that one of my friends was in conversation with two very attractive men. She gave me one of our subtle little signs which meant, join in. (We also had a sign for help, as well as maybe help me soon but this was a definite come and join us right now!)

I went over. They looked even better close up, and I noticed that one of them smelled so good.

What aftershave is that? I asked flirtatiously.

Issey Miyake, he replied. I bought it last week.

Then the conversation rapidly took a turn down Tedium Avenue. He began asking me boring questions with little or no interest in my answers. Yet another man with absolutely no sex appeal and very little charm, I thought to myself.

It was then that I spotted Leo, standing a few metres away with three attractive women who were laughing with him. I noticed how one kept stroking his arm, deciding she must have been his girlfriend. But then I noticed him taking her hand off, giving her a playful tap on the hand as if to say enough is enough. The good-looking but utterly charmless man I was standing next to carried on talking to me about something or other, probably still on about the aftershave he was wearing.

I managed to catch Leos eye for a few seconds, then looked down to the floor. I looked up again to see him still looking at me. He smiled, and then walked towards the exit with a lighter and cigarette in his hand. I followed.

After I made my excuses to Prince Charmless, I took a moment to think about what I was doing. Why was I following Leo? I had no need to go outside. It was obvious that there was something about him that was drawing me towards him, but what? Eventually I came up with my pretext to explain why I was following him: I would say the guy I was talking to was boring me and I needed to get away from him. It was true, but I also knew that I could have just gone back to my group of friends, or given one of them the help signal and they would have rescued me.