Copyright 2020 by Myka Meier
Photographs copyright 2020 by You Look Lovely Photography
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Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data is available on file.
Cover design by Daniel Brount
Cover images by You Look Lovely Photography, Brook Christopher, and gettyimages
Print ISBN: 978-1-5107-4777-7
Ebook ISBN: 978-1-5107-4778-4
Printed in China
Lovingly dedicated to my kind, strong (and polite!), beautiful little Valentina
Contents
Introduction
Dont Fake It Until You Make ItPractice It Until You Become It
Hello, hello! Im so glad youre here. If youre reading this, perhaps youve decided youre ready for a change. Maybe you want to completely revamp yourself, or maybe you just want a bit of social polishing. Perhaps you grew up in a formal environment and want to brush up, or maybe you grew up with not much at all and look forward to learning A to Z. Regardless of your background, you should be excited, because soon after reading this book, people will start to comment on how you seem different... in a good way, of course! Why? Because you will appear a bit more elegant, a splash more sophisticated, extra confident, and more charismatic. Soon youll realize that not only do you feel more polished, but youll also notice youre turning more heads. You will, after all, be practicing the Five-Step Meier Method, taught throughout this book to give you an upper edge in all areas of your life. What youll learn in the following chapters isnt rocket science, but promises to offer practical, modern, and relatable tips that you can start using instantly.
This book is broken down into the five easy steps needed to completely transform yourself through, you guessed it, etiquette. Through the Five-Step Meier Method, you will learn how to first transform yourself, then how to attract the type of people and life you want, how to feel empowered and exude confidence, how to thrive socially, and finally, how to practice it daily.
The Five-Step Meier Method
1. TRANSFORM
2. ATTRACT
3. EMPOWER
4. THRIVE
5. PRACTICE
Easy, right? Dont worry, I will be guiding you through every step of the process. You see, long ago I realized that etiquette is an avenue to confidence and success, and I created the Meier Method to help other people realize that, too.
Now, first things first. Etiquette is much more than you maybe even knew. When people come to me to learn, they often think they will walk away with a better understanding of how to hold a fork and knife and sit up straight. Sigh. This would be so dull. Etiquette, my friends, is way more than this! Etiquette is actually this fabulous way of conducting yourself to show respect, consideration, and kindness to those around you. Its putting everyone and all living things before yourself. Its about practicing social and emotional intelligence, or EQ (emotional quotient). The bonus is the polishing part. To put yourself together and look exquisite is not just about making yourself feel great, but about making the people around you feel special that you got all razzle dazzled up for them. See? In the end its still all about showing others respect through your actions. Its an extra advantage that you look dashing in the end, too!
When people start noticing these subtle (and some not-so-subtle) differences, theyll want to know your secret. If or when you tell people you are reading an etiquette book, they will likely say one of the following statements, so let me just address them up front.
Etiquette is outdated, a lost art form... dare I say it, antiquated.
Actually, etiquette is arguably more relevant today than ever before. With examples such as new forms of electronic communication, gender equality, and international travel, we have had to rewrite the rules of etiquette in many instances. We are so attached to our cell phones and devices that we forget how to communicate in person, how to eat around a table, or socialize without checking a phone. Society is evolving and changing so rapidly, that we must change with it.
Etiquette is stuffy and only for the 1 percent.
Au contraire. Etiquette is for everyone and you dont have to have a penny to learn it or practice it. You can learn it online, in school, and even from your parents or grandparents. In all my years training and instructing etiquette, I bet youll never guess where, to this day, after more than sixty-five countries and countless cities, I would award the best etiquette. The most jaw-dropping display of good etiquette I have ever witnessed was in a tiny village on the outskirts of a hippo bog in Zambia. The villagers didnt have two pennies to rub together, but I still get goosebumps thinking about how incredibly selfless and thoughtful these people were. I was sleeping in a canvas tent which had a lock on it, literally so no animal could enter in the night, and in the morning, I was instructed to blow my given whistle when I was ready to come out. Within what seemed like half a second later, a figure stood at my tent. As the doorway opened, there stood a man with the warmest smile, holding his hand out to help me. With a bit of a graceful bow at the waist, he helped me step over the ledge. As I stepped out, I felt something over my head. I looked up, surprised to see an umbrella made out of animal hide hovering overhead. Oh, you are so kind, but its not raining! With a smile, the man said, Its to protect you from the dew drops. Shrugging my shoulders in return, I began to walk out of the tent toward the breakfast area. As I walked, I heard a clop, clop, clop sound and realized quarter-sized drops of water from the sausage trees above were landing on the hide umbrella being carried over my head. As I continued walking, I heard a rustling behind me. I turned to see another man rolling up a carpet that I had been walking on. The man saw that I noticed him and said, Pardon me, maam. I simply laid this down earlier so that you would not sink into the mud as you walked outside of your tent. I couldnt believe my eyes. I wasnt anyone important, but in that moment, I felt like the most important person on earth. As I arrived at the breakfast table, the seat was pulled out and tucked in behind me. As I looked over the table, which had been beautifully set, I was startled to feel a shawl being delicately placed over my shoulders. So that you dont feel cold, Madam, another man said. I wondered what he meant, as I was in Africa, but obliged anyway. As I sipped my coffee, a gust of wind breezed over the camp and the chill on my face reminded me that my shoulders were fully covered. These people had thought of everything! They literally knew what I needed before I even knew I needed it myself. This is the epitome of good etiquette, taking care of others and making them feel comfortable and respected, especially when in your care. Not a stuffy, pretentious bone in their bodies, and with nothing financially to show, yet they were the most gracious people on earth.
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