Jennifer Roback Morse - 101 Tips for a Happier Marriage: Simple Ways for Couples to Grow Closer to God and to Each Other

As someone who, through the grace of God and a lot of hard work, was able to rebuild a marriage, I can say that this book offers so much to couples who may be struggling. First and foremost, it helps husbands and wives understand the true definition of marriage as God ordained it. Second, it is filled with practical and very doable action items for everyday people with busy lives. If couples truly make an effort to apply the advice in 101 Tips for a Happier Marriage , their relationshipnot only with their spouse but also with the Lordwill be the best it can be.

Teresa Tomeo

Host of Catholic Connection

How can something as wide and complex as marital conflict be addressed by a book so slender and simple? Our culture stresses the wedding day and forgets the married lifeuntil the wheels start coming off and then its often too late. But there is hope. This wise and practical book is not only for couples who want to make their good marriages great, but is even better for couples who, for their own unique and pain-drenched reasons, find themselves tempted to give up on the dream. To Dr. Jennifer Roback Morse and Betsy Kerekes go the laurels for this much-needed manual for strengthening men and women for what G. K. Chesterton called the duel to the death which no man of honor should decline.

Patrick Coffin

Host of Catholic Answers Live

This is the best assimilation of received and gathered wisdom on marriage Ive seen. In short and pithy darts of advice, the authors deliver universal truths in sharp and witty zingers that are at times brilliant revelations and bracing reminders of what we cant not know, but somehow keep forgetting. This book is for every couple preparing for the sacrament and every couple holding up the institution through thick and thin. Bold and practical, this gem is a gift and a guide for everyone in all stages of life. I love it!

Sheila Liaugminas

Host of A Closer Look

101 Tips for a Happier Marriage is full of practical, helpful ideas to keep a marriage alive and well. It should be handed out to every couple going through a pre-Cana program. If every couple followed its advice, there would be many more happy and successful marriages!

Patrice Fagnant-MacArthur

Author of The Catholic Baby Name Book

At last! A good and reliable guide to what it takes to make a marriage work and make it last a lifetime. The authors show us that a successful marriage is more about being good than feeling good. Being a good spouse is about being a good person. Virtue is the key to a happy marriage as it is the key to a happy life. If love is about laying down our life for our friends, marriage is about laying down our life for our best friend. This little gem of a book should be read by every married couple and by those planning to get married.

Joseph Pearce

Author of The Quest for Shakespeare

The Morse-Kerekes approach to making marriage last is a solid, frank presentation of the major issues that come up or can come up in any marriage. In addition, in the anti-marriage climate of our time, the authors face frankly the arguments given for deviant or alternative ways and directly point out why such views are erroneous. This is a very fundamental approach by writers who know in-depth what is at issue for families, Church, and society.

James V. Schall, S.J.

Professor of Political Philosophy

Georgetown University

Finally, a book that combines a deep understanding of the truth of marriage with essential advice about how to make marriage work. Reading this book will make you a better spouse because it will make you a better person. I will be giving 101 Tips for a Happier Marriage to every new couple I know.

Angela Franks

Theological Institute for the New Evangelization

St. Johns Seminary

An eye-opening, energizing, attitude-adjusting, wake-up-call-of-a-book that every married couple should read and re-read. A power-packed energy drink of marital wisdom and truth.

Tom Allen

Founding Editor and President of Catholic Exchange

Marriage is a sacramentholy and profound in meaning. But to the person wondering how he or she can continue to live with the stranger on the other side of the bed, the theology of marriage seems a distant abstraction. When the mechanics of a marriagecommunication, respect, affectionare broken, a lecture on the theoretical physics of it is of limited value. What you want is a practical toolbox: the words, the gestures, and small everyday acts that can get it running again. This is exactly what is provided in this little treasure of a book. Do this, not that. Say this, not that. Even: think this, not that. Whether your marriage needs only a little tune-up, or a major overhaul, 101 Tips for a Happier Marriage is essential reading.

Mary Kochan

Editor-in-Chief of Catholic Lane

_____________________________

2013 by Jennifer Roback Morse and Betsy Kerekes

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be used or reproduced in any manner whatsoever, except in the case of reprints in the context of reviews, without written permission from Ave Maria Press, Inc., P.O. Box 428, Notre Dame, IN 46556, 1-800-282-1865.

Founded in 1865, Ave Maria Press is a ministry of the United States Province of Holy Cross.

www.avemariapress.com

Paperback: ISBN-10 1-59471-446-0, ISBN-13 978-1-59471-446-7

E-book: ISBN-10 1-59471-447-9, ISBN-13 978-1-59471-447-4

Cover image Thinkstock.com

Cover and text design by Brian C. Conley.

Printed and bound in the United States of America.

Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data is available.

God is God.

You are not.

Your spouse is not.

CONTENTS

ACKNOWLEDGMENTS

We are both grateful to the staff and supporters of the Ruth Institute. This project began before the Ruth Institute existed, but the Ruth Institute staff made this a better book, and Ruth Institute readers blessed us with their feedback.

Jennifer

The book you are holding in your hand is a project of many loves in my life. Love for my husband, first of all. Love for my children, for whom our marriage was so important. Love for my readers, and finally, love for my friend and coauthor, Betsy Kerekes.

Betsy

For this book being made possible, Id like to thank the following people: First and foremost, our Heavenly Father, without whom this book, my marriage, my faith, and my life would not exist. I owe it all to you. Secondly, I thank my coauthor, Jennifer Morse, for allowing me to collaborate with you. Its been an honor. Next is my beloved husband Paul. Thanks for being so wonderful at this whole marriage thing and for giving me perspective on how a happy marriage looks! And finally, the people at Ave Maria Press, starting with a seemingly chance encounter with Dianna Leinen, leading me to Kristi McDonald and the rest of the AMP staff. Thank you for all that you do.

INTRODUCTION

WHY YOU WANT THIS BOOK

Every person who gets married in the Catholic Church today is making some pretty bold statements:

• Almighty God wants me to love my spouse for the rest of my life.
• I am making a commitment to love this person, even if he or she becomes difficult.
• Even if my spouse becomes nearly impossible to live with, I will continue to act in an attitude of love toward him or her.
• Loving my spouse is part of my personal path to holiness.

Like I said, pretty bold statements.

Considering the ease of divorce in the event of problems, the ease of cohabitation as a substitute for marriage, and the frequency of women choosing to become unmarried mothers, entering into a sacramental marriage is, at the very least, countercultural. Marriage is no longer the socially expected, normal life path that people coast along on auto-pilot. Marriage is an adventure in cultural renewal, an adventure in self-consciously building up what Blessed John Paul II called a civilization of love.