Shelly Hagen - The Everything Body Language Book: Succeed in work, love, and life--all without saying a word!
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How can I show my boss that I am ready for a promotion?
I think that girl likes me, but Im not sure.
Crossed arms. Eye contact. Fidgeting. These are all the bodys subtle ways of speaking, and they can tell you more than you think. With over half of human communication coming from movement, you need a comprehensive guide to reading and understanding body language. This updated edition features an expanded section on discovering deception and foolproof ways to spot a liar.
With this guide, youll learn valuable nonverbal nuances, including how to:
Shelly Hagen: author's other books
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EVERYTHING.
BODY LANGUAGE
BOOK2ND EDITION
Dear Reader,
In my line of work, Ive been fortunate enough to work with some incredibly smart, interesting, and informed people. Every now and then, someone will ask me to single out my absolute favorite project, and without hesitation, I answer, The Everything Body Language Book. Once I say that, people immediately want to know what I know. How can I make my boss like me? theyll ask, or, How can I tell if my boyfriend is lying to me? And while Im happy to share what Ive learned, Im also eager to tell anyone who will listen that they should make learning about nonverbal communication a priority in their life.
The thing about body language is that its useful in literally every single personal interaction, on any day, at any time. Learning the basics cannot only improve the way people perceive you, it can actually change the way they react to you. The ramifications of this can affect and improve every single area of your life, from work to personal relationships to the amount you pay for a new car.
The information in this book is updated for 2011 and ready for you to put into practice. Use it to your advantage!
Shelly Hagen
These handy, accessible books give you all you need to tackle a difficult project, gain a new hobby, comprehend a fascinating topic, prepare for an exam, or even brush up on something you learned back in school but have since forgotten.
You can choose to read an Everything book from cover to cover or just pick out the information you want from our four useful boxes: e-questions, e-facts, e-alerts, and e-ssentials. We give you everything you need to know on the subject, but throw in a lot of fun stuff along the way, too.
We now have more than 400 Everything books in print, spanning such wide-ranging categories as weddings, pregnancy, cooking, music instruction, foreign language, crafts, pets, New Age, and so much more. When youre done reading them all, you can finally say you know Everything!
PUBLISHER Karen Cooper
DIRECTOR OF ACQUISITIONS AND INNOVATION Paula Munier
MANAGING EDITOR, EVERYTHING SERIES Lisa Laing
COPY CHIEF Casey Ebert
ASSISTANT PRODUCTION EDITOR Jacob Erickson
ACQUISITIONS EDITOR Kate Powers
ASSOCIATE DEVELOPMENT EDITOR Hillary Thompson
EDITORIAL ASSISTANT Ross Weisman
EVERYTHING SERIES COVER DESIGNER Erin Alexander
LAYOUT DESIGNERS Colleen Cunningham, Elisabeth Lariviere, Ashley Vierra, Denise Wallace
Visit the entire Everything series at www.everything.com
THE
EVERYTHING
BODY LANGUAGE
BOOK
2ND EDITION
Succeed in work, love, and life
all without saying a word!
Shelly Hagen
Technical Review by Joseph A. DeVito, PhD
For the Hagen men-boys, the loves of my life.
Copyright 2011, 2008 Simon and Schuster All rights reserved.
This book, or parts thereof, may not be reproduced
in any form without permission from the publisher; exceptions
are made for brief excerpts used in published reviews.
An Everything Series Book.
Everything and everything.com are registered trademarks of F+W Media, Inc.
Published by Adams Media, an imprint of Simon & Schuster, Inc.
57 Littlefield Street, Avon, MA 02322 U.S.A.
www.adamsmedia.com
ISBN 10: 1-4405-2583-8
ISBN 13: 978-1-4405-2583-4
eISBN 10: 1-4405-2683-4
eISBN 13: 978-1-4405-2683-1
Printed in the United States of America.
10987654321
Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data
Hagen, Shelly.
The everything body language book / Shelly Hagen ; technical review by Joseph A. DeVito. 2nd ed.
p. cm.
Includes bibliographical references and index.
ISBN 978-1-4405-2583-4 (alk. paper)
1. Body language. I. DeVito, Joseph A. II. Title.
BF637.N66H34 2011
153.69dc22
2011010217
This publication is designed to provide accurate and authoritative information with regard to the subject matter covered. It is sold with the understanding that the publisher is not engaged in rendering legal, accounting, or other professional advice. If legal advice or other expert assistance is required, the services of a competent professional person should be sought.
From a Declaration of Principles jointly adopted by a Committee of the
American Bar Association and a Committee of Publishers and Associations
Interior photographs elektraVision and Image Source.
This book is available at quantity discounts for bulk purchases.
For information, please call 1-800-289-0963.
Every book is a team effort. Many thanks to:
Katelynn Lacopo at Bookends, for bringing me back into my favorite project;
Kate Powers at Adams Media, for your sunny disposition with every e-mail reply;
My family, the men who admire what I do even when dinner is late because of it.
Wide eyes
Flushed face
Self-touches (touching the nose, rubbing the back of the neck)
Lack of eye contact
Excessive, wont-back-down eye contact
Excessive blinking
Angling the body away from the accuser
Hiding the hands
Biting the lips or covering the mouth
Exaggerated movement of arms and legs
Imagine a world where youre never misunderstood, where you never send or receive mixed messages, where you never have to backtrack and say, Hey, thats not what I meant!
Some people view body language as a luxury, something theyll learn about if and when they have the time. These same folks would probably be surprised to learn that experts estimate that a full two-thirds of communication is nonverbal. (Makes learning body language seem like a bit more of a necessity, doesnt it?) So when you are speaking with someone, youre not just processing what theyre saying, youre subconsciously picking up on their movements as well. If their actions jive with their words, then youre likely to decideagain, subconsciouslythat this person is on the up-and-up. If something is off between someones words and movements, however, theres a good chance that youll hold that person at arms length, possibly without realizing why.
Most people want to learn body language for a specific event in their life, like a job interview, a first date, or turning the tables on a big old liar. But what you learn about nonverbal communication can be used in all kinds of situations, from work to school to interacting with your neighbors. Its one thing to know how to charm people with your words; fortifying those words with the right unspoken cues really sells you and your personality to the people around you.
Reading body language can help you navigate your way around almost any situation where you feel you need a key or legend to understand the other persons intention. Think of the information in this book as your Rosetta Stone for decoding your interpersonal relationships. In these pages, youll read about every part of the body, and the subconscious signals hidden there. Along with this information, youll take a look at different scenarios where having an intimate knowledge of the meaning behind the gestures will give you a definite advantage and make your life significantly less stressful.
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