Peta Heskell - The Little Book of Flirting

To everyone who has the courage to leap into lifes

adventure and go for it.

A mega thanks to all my clients, participants of the

playshops and friends who made it possible for me

to do my work and spread a little sunshine in the

world. Keep shining.

CONTENTS

What do we mean by flirting anyway?

Lets begin by redefining the word flirting. Remember, if we didnt redefine things as we went along wed all still be hunting for our meat and living in caves. Flirting comes from the old French word fleurter, meaning to flower. Here are a few modern definitions from participants in my flirting classes:

1. Flirting is about fun, connecting with and getting to know people.
2. Flirting is a way of showing people you are interested in them.
3. Flirting is about giving compliments, smiling and making people happy.
4. Flirting is like a butterfly that flutters past in all its beauty, and when we try to catch it, it flies away leaving us wanting more
5. Flirting is making yourself so attractive that people cant resist you.
6. Flirting is being able to break down peoples barriers and make contact.
7. Flirting is a harmless entertaining diversion that you can choose to take further if you wish.

Heres a mnemonic that sums up flirting for me:

Flirting isnt just restricted to interaction with the opposite sex. Its also useful in social and work situations. Your style of flirting can range from simply social to strongly sexual. Great flirting, when done appropriately and with a friendly go-for-it attitude, is the gateway to more romance, deeper friendships, enhanced professional relationships and a definite feel-good sensation for you and people you flirt with.

Flirting is feeling great about yourself and resonating this to the world so that the right people are drawn to you irresistibly!

The best flirts do it with everyone!

This book is about how to be the kind of person who can flirt with anyone they choose! My friend Lesley is like that. She ran a business for 25 years, flirting with everyone. To this day she flirts with elderly people, children, babies, men and women. She flirts saucily with men she fancies and kindly with men she doesnt. She enjoys a joke and she can be really raunchy and very gentle. At the age of 49 she still has men chasing after her and shes been happily married for 26 years. Women consult her about their relationships and parents allow her to adopt their children. Therell be standing room only at her funeral!

Becoming a flirt

In this little book you will learn how to master the art of flirting. It contains everything you need to know to make yourself completely and utterly irresistible!

Great flirts love who they are and what they do. This book will help you discover how wonderful you are and encourage you to live your life from this position. It is about meeting yourself, falling in love with yourself and learning to interact with the world from that basis.

Think of this book as a guide, motivator and instigator of fun as you flirt your way through life.

Remember though, books dont jump out and change you overnight while you sleep. They offer you ways of thinking and acting that can help you to change yourself for the better. But you have to choose to do the work to make it happen!

Do you choose to become a great flirt? Lets start now!

As a successful flirt you will be able to make things happen for you, not to you. You will make things happen because of what you do, not despite what you do. What do you do now? You may have some patterns of behaviour that dont serve you and some that do. Lets look now at your current flirting patterns.

How do you currently flirt?

Perhaps you are a bit of a flirt already. Perhaps you flirt but dont get the results you want. Perhaps you dont flirt at all. The following questions will help you realize how flirtatious you currently are and what you need to work on:

I was greeting people at the door of a seminar when a colleague arrived on the back of a taxi-bike. The rider came over to ask me more about the seminar. I thought he was gorgeous. After a short chat, I had to go. I handed him my card and started to walk downstairs. Halfway down I turned round and rushed back upstairs. I asked him if he would take me for a ride on his motorcycle. Two years later, were still together!

Sometimes you have to follow your instincts and not worry about the consequences. I didnt stop to think this guy might refuse me or think I was too pushy I just went for it!

Sometimes you have to follow your instincts and just go for it!

Fran was directing a TV documentary about my seminar. On the train home, a man got into her carriage, smiled and said, Hello. Normally, Fran would have mumbled an indistinct greeting and got on with her work. This time, she remembered something Id said about connecting, and she smiled back and made a comment about a topical event. They chatted and discovered they were both in the TV business and he knew her husband. They exchanged telephone numbers and made plans to meet up with their partners. Who knows where this friendship will lead?

Sometimes it is our willingness to take advantage of unlikely situations that leads us to a wonderful friendship, a new relationship or that great business opportunity.

Sue attended one of my personal development events. She called me up the next day, thanked me for the evening and then told me that she knew that I was an influential person and had a far wider reach in the personal development community than she did. She told me a story that made me laugh and asked if I would publicize her coaching. I attended one of her sessions and I did publicize her because she was good.