Aitken - 50 Ways of Saying Fabulous Book 1 20th Anniversary Edition

This novel is set in Central Otago, New Zealand, an area where I grew up and know very well. However, when this novel was first published, I decided in consultation with my Australian editor to fictionalise some of the place names. This was done out of respect to friends and family who still lived in this district and to lessen the impact of people reading the novel and concluding that the mother character Reebie was based on my mother etc.

So for those readers who know this region and perhaps found this curious, I just wanted to explain why some place names are made up, while others (Dunedin, Palmerston etc) are not.

The fictionalised setting names are as follows:

Mawera the farming community where Billys family lives

Crayburn a small village with a shop and a pub, located some 15 miles from Mawera

Glenora the major town in the district, located some 30 miles from Mawera

Serpentine county the district which encompasses all of these locations

When I was twelve years old, my most precious possession was the tail of a heifer that had died giving birth. My father cut it off and handed it to me when I asked for it, presuming I wanted it as a trophy, pleased that I was finally taking an interest in his cows. Rather, I had recognised a potential in that tail my father would never have dreamt of. I trimmed the dags off, washed, dried, brushed it tirelessly with my own hairbrush and tied the end of it with some red ribbon. After days of top secret preparation, with Babe banned from my bedroom, it was ready. Before going to bed, I announced that there would be a surprise at breakfast the next morning.

Morning came. I could barely dress myself for the excitement. My fingers were trembling. I gave up on the idea of a shirt and pulled on a skivvy instead. I put on my woolly hat (though hats werent allowed indoors) and tucked one end of the tail beneath it. When I made my entrance into the kitchen, the cows tail draped over one shoulder, Babe clapped her hands together in delight. My parents looked up from their porridge. I informed them that they were to call me Judy from now on. Babe applauded even louder. My parents looked bewildered. Babe explained that I was Judy Robinson out of Lost in Space. With that long white ponytail, I was convinced I looked exactly like my favourite television star.

Porridge is on the stove, Judy, was my mothers only comment. She regarded it as yet another of my fantasies. My father tried his best to ignore it. There were no reprimands. Neither of them told me not to wear the cow tail. But they didnt tell me I looked ravishing and just like Judy either. Which I did.

Their lack of enthusiasm prompted me to find an outfit to enhance the resemblance. My mothers lavender bed jacket was the obvious choice. Its clinging fit and shimmering satin made it the most futuristic garment in the house. When I modelled myself for Lou, she insisted I take her black swimming cap. It was far superior to my hat in terms of space age fashion. Studying myself in the mirror, I was impressed by my transformation. I insisted that Lou and Babe play Lost in Space with me in the turnip paddock immediately. The dogs acted as various forms of repulsive alien life to run from screaming.

Being Judy, I got to scream the most.