Daulter Anni - Sacred relationship: heart work for couples: daily practices and inspirations for a deeper connection

Copyright 2017 by Anni Daulter and Tim Daulter. All rights reserved. No portion of this book, except for brief review, may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any meanselectronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording, or otherwisewithout the written permission of the publisher. For information contact North Atlantic Books.

Published by

North Atlantic Books

Berkeley, California

Cover photo by Sarah Loven of Ready Gypset Go

Cover design by Claudia Smelser

Interior design by Claudia Smelser, Jasmine Hromjak, and Happenstance Type-O-Rama

Printed in the United States of America

Sacred Relationship: Heart Work for Couples is sponsored and published by the Society for the Study of Native Arts and Sciences (dba North Atlantic Books), an educational nonprofit based in Berkeley, California, that collaborates with partners to develop cross-cultural perspectives, nurture holistic views of art, science, the humanities, and healing, and seed personal and global transformation by publishing work on the relationship of body, spirit, and nature.

North Atlantic Books publications are available through most bookstores. For further information, visit our website at www.northatlanticbooks.com or call 800-733-3000.

Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data

Names: Daulter, Anni, author. | Daulter, Tim, author.

Title: Sacred relationship : heart work for couples : daily practices and

inspirations for a deeper connection / Anni Daulter, Tim Daulter.

Description: Berkeley, California : North Atlantic Books, 2017.

Identifiers: LCCN 2017006333| ISBN 9781623171209 (paperback) | ISBN

9781623171216 (ebook)

Subjects: LCSH: Marriage--Psychological aspects. | Interpersonal relations. |

Self-actualization (Psychology) | Love. | BISAC: FAMILY & RELATIONSHIPS /

Marriage. | SELF-HELP / Personal Growth / Happiness. | PSYCHOLOGY / Human

Sexuality.

Classification: LCC HQ503 .D38 2017 | DDC 306.8--dc23

LC record available at https://lccn.loc.gov/2017006333

North Atlantic Books is committed to the protection of our environment. We partner with FSC-certified printers using soy-based inks and print on recycled paper whenever possible.

This is a book for all couplesnot just those living in struggle, but all who want to live in high-vibration relationships and to do better and be better for each other and the world. It is also dedicated to my beloved, who has been my mirror, my rock, my heart, and my champion for many years. To say I love you barely scratches the surface of how my heart longs for you, so know that while I search for the best words to express my connection to you, I will just be here, ever-present and fully committed to our shared dreams.

~Anni

I dedicate this book to love! For it was love that brought my soulmate to me. It was love that brought four wonderful children into my life. Every moment of happiness, every smile, and every belly laugh has been a gift from love. I wish for every reader of this book to be able to share the kind of love that has blessed me. My gratitude to you, Anni, is unfathomable, for without your love, support, guidance, forgiveness, and grace I would not be the man I am today.

~Tim

Welcome to Sacred Relationship, the book! We appreciate and honor your willingness to raise your love relationship to a higher level and share that awareness in the world. This is important not only because your love relationship is the center of your lifeand key to your own personal happinessbut because this heart work will also serve as an example to your children, family, and friends. We define sacred as something that is of or connected to the Divine and is worthy of reverence and respect. When you treat your beloved and your relationship as sacred, you are literally changing the world.

The material and basis for this book are extensions of the Sacred Relationship live retreats (www.oursacredrelationship.com) that we have developed as part of the larger Sacred Living Movement (www.sacredlivingmovement.com). These retreats are held at various locations all over the world, and allow couples the space, for four uninterrupted days, to learn directly from us how to elevate their vibration, both separately and collectively, fall back into trust and heartfelt love with one another, get ooey-gooey romantic again, and learn practices to take home that will have positive effects on every aspect of their lives.

The approaches and techniques that you will learn in this book came directly from our own personal experience as individuals and as a couple who struggled and found our way out of a dark place into the brilliant light of a truly sacred connection with one another. Our relationship has gone through its ups and downs andafter ten years of marriage, four kids, and several entrepreneurial ventureshad fallen into such a state of neglect that we almost lost it. With the gifts of spiritual inspiration, we decided to make changes in our personal spiritual daily practices, how we thought about each other, how we talked to each other, and how we treated each other.

We did a lot of healing, and created a new relationship with a focused intention on love and living in our higher selves. The work of this book begins with the hope that you will look at your relationship with fresh eyes; then it moves into taking a deep drink of healing and releasing old wounds; finally, it encourages you to develop a set of simple daily practices that can profoundly transform your love relationship, and your life as a whole.

This book is meant to be used as a relationship course for both of you. You should take the topics in order, from Week 132, and focus on no more than one topic per week. This time is needed for you to discuss the content with your beloved, do the suggested practices, and integrate the learning before moving on to the next week. There is an expansive difference between intellectual knowing and experiential knowing. Sitting and reading all of the information in the book can be a good start, but the real change in your life will come from doing the practices and integrating the heart-work changes into the way that you feel, think, and act.

For each lesson, we suggest that you and your beloved start your week by sitting separately and reading the chapter. It may be convenient for you to get an additional copy so that each of you has your own. Once you have both read the chapter, talk it through together to see what insights, thoughts, or feelings came up for you. Afterward, make a conscious plan to try some of the suggested Ideas and Practices and explore some of the Pairings during the week.

Make sure to regularly connect with each other on how its going and what changes you are feeling. Keep in mind that there are individual and couple components of the book, so that each of you is working on yourself as well as reigniting or elevating your love spark. At the end of the week, come together again to review the heart work you have done and perform the journaling exercise together.

One powerful aspect of our Sacred Relationship live retreats is doing the work in community with other like-minded couples. So your experience would be even more enhanced if you could get together with a few other couples who are interested in working through the book at the same time. You can set up a weekly book club meeting to socialize and share your experiences each week. You can learn so much from hearing what other couples are going through, and this is a good way to stay motivated to do the work.