Bethenny Frankel - I Suck at Relationships So You Don’t Have To

More from the Author
Skinnygirl Cocktails	Skinnygirl Solutions
Skinnydipping	A Place of Yes
The Skinnygirl Dish	Naturally Thin

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Acknowledgments

I cannot believe that this is my eighth book. I remember writing Naturally Thin and it feeling like the most daunting task yet the most liberating because it simply poured out of me.

I must acknowledge you, the readers. Youre the reason I feel so safe and comfortable to express and expose myself with the intention of hoping that I might help you to get through something difficult or that you might relate to something crazy that goes through my mind or occurs in my life.

Thank you to Touchstone, the publishing imprint that has been with me since my very first word on paper. Thank you to Matthew Benjamin and David Falk, my very communicative, supportive, and passionate friends at Touchstone. Thank you to Zachary Schisgal and Jeremy Katz (the first people in publishing to give me a shot). I never forget who helped me out when I was irrelevant in this biz.

Thank you to Eve Adamson. We have definitely had a great impact on each others lives, and I love being on this journey with you. You are an incredible and trusting support.

Thank you to my Skinnygirls: Alex, Julia, Leslie, and Meghan. I am not easy. The job isnt easy, and for the past two years the environment hasnt been easy. I appreciate your passion, drive, and dedication. Leslie, I truly appreciate what you have been through and I will never forget it.

Thank you to Bryn, my love, my peanut. You are the purity in my life, and the element that gives it all meaning and makes so many other things so insignificant. I love you with all my heart and soul. You are the greatest gift in my life.

Thank you Cookie. You have been at my feet for every word Ive ever written. Ive spent more time with you than any other living creature. I love you more than words can say.

Thank you to my BIG. You inspired the idea for this book and you have inspired me and taught me so much about relationships. Beginners luck? 143.

Thank you to my girlfriends Sarah and Teri. Youre my therapists. Xo.

Thank you to all of youfor watching, for reading, for writing, for connecting, and most of all for being so fearless and honest.

You have made me a writer.

We really are in this thing together. I am forever grateful.

ALSO BY BETHENNY FRANKEL

Naturally Thin

The Skinnygirl Dish

A Place of Yes

Skinnydipping

Skinnygirl Solutions

Skinnygirl Cocktails

About the Author

Bethenny Frankel is the four-time bestselling author of Skinnydipping, A Place of Yes, The Skinnygirl Dish, and Naturally Thin . She is the creator of the Skinnygirl brandwhich extends to cocktails, fitness, and healthand focuses on practical solutions for women. She has been named one of the Top 100 Most Powerful Celebrities by Forbes magazine, and has been featured in both Health and Glamour magazines. She is a graduate of the Natural Gourmet Institute for Health and Culinary Arts. Bethenny lives in New York with her daughter, Bryn, and dog, Cookie.

Dr. Xavier Amador is the author of many popular books, including I Am Right, Youre Wrong, Now What? ; I Am Not Sick, I Dont Need Help! ; and Being Single in a Couples World: How to Be Happily Single and Open to Love . Dr. Amador draws on thirty years of experience, including personal experience, as well as the latest academic and clinical research. A nationally respected expert and university professor, Dr. Amador has been featured on PBS NOVA , ABC Primetime Live , and NBC Bravo. Dr. Amador is frequently called upon by news outlets such as CNN, ABC News, NBC News, Fox News, CBS 60 Minutes , Good Morning America , NBC Today show, the New York Times , the Washington Post , USA Today , the Wall Street Journal , Cosmopolitan , Glamour , and many others. Currently a visiting professor at the State University of New York, for two decades he was a professor of psychiatry and psychology at Columbia University in New York City. To learn more, or to contact him, visit: www.dramador.com.

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CHAPTER 1

Understand the Man

Men always want to be a womans first love. That is their clumsy vanity. We women have a more subtle instinct about things. What we like is to be a mans last romance.

M RS. A LLONBY IN O SCAR W ILDES A W OMAN OF N O I MPORTANCE

W omen. Men. Were there ever two more completely different animals working at cross purposes? It has taken me many years, many failed relationships, and a lot of time with my guy friends, but I think I am finally beginning to understand the man. This wasnt always the case. For much of my life, I didnt understand what men need. I thought they pretty much wanted the same things women want. Wrong . Men not only want different things than we do, but they think differently, they process differently, they love differently. They are a completely different animal.

The first time I really began to understand what men want was when I dated a very confident and very good-looking bachelor whom I really fell for. We really connected and had a very passionate relationship, but I didnt understand why he did a lot of the things he did. Why wasnt he interested in talking about our relationship for hours? Why wasnt he upset about things when I was upset about things? Why didnt he feel guilty when I nagged him? Why did he feel like doing things without me sometimes? If I hadnt loved him so much, I wouldnt have done the work to figure out the puzzle that is Man. So I watched him. I observed. I listened to the things he said to me and others. And I got some ideas.