The Art of Reading Gestures & Postures
BODY
Language
Vinay Mohan Sharma
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ISBN 978-93-813841-4-5
Edition: April 2011
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Contents
Preface
When we speak something, it is our body and its gestures that help in conveying the desired message effectively and easily. Sometimes we dont utter a single word, and yet we are able to communicate a lot. It is because our body parts, especially our facial expressions combined with various other gestures, speak a language of their own, which we call body language. It is not always that what we speak is really what we intend to say. Most of the time, while speaking, we do actually act. Our acting involves varying our speech and body gestures to suit different circumstances which we come across on different occasions in our daily life.
The whole world is like a stage where we all are mere performers. That is why we talk and behave differently with different people. While living in the same environment with a similar set of people for long, one tends to become stereotyped in ones behaviour. And, in that case, it is highly possible that our acquaintances or people who interact with us regularly can easily understand our body language. Frankly speaking, body language is the only language which is common all over the world. Everybody can easily communicate through this language. But one must learn to interpret it precisely; otherwise, misinterpretation of body gestures could create lot of problems.
Our body responds to or expresses various emotions like sadness, happiness, excitement, anger, repentance, love, affection, lust, abhorrence etc. You must have observed that when a person is happy or excited over some good happening, his pupils get dilated and cheeks start glowing due to fast blood circulation. Other body parts like arms and legs too develop a rhythm about their movement. On the other hand, when one is angry, the eyes turn a bit reddish, the face is strained and the eyebrows are tightened upwards.
Sometimes, during a chat between two persons, it is observed that one person is the dominant speaker, while the other is a mere listener. Of course, this is not chatting but preaching, in which the dominant speaker is preaching to the other person or instructing him. In such a chat, the dominant speaker can gauge from the expressions of the listener whether the latter is really enjoying listening to him, is a bit intimidated, or feeling bored. For a good conversation, all the participants should have real interest in the talk and they should also listen sincerely to what the fellow participants say. By reading the fellow speakers expressions, especially facial, one can judge his or her interest. If you see expressions of abhorrence or poor interest on the faces of fellow listeners, check yourself, control your mental faculties, and then go accordingly. Otherwise, such a chat can create unnecessary fuss. It is bad to overload others with your own opinions which they dont want to support. If you persist with such an exercise, then you are simply wasting your own energy.
We humans are social animals and we have to interact with other people in society. During our social interaction, we come across all sorts of people like doctors, advocates, judges, policemen, teachers, parents, colleagues, astrologers, cousins, among others. To interact with all these people in a better way, you must learn to interpret their body gestures. During a court appearance, you can ascertain whether the judge is going to pass judgement in your favour or against by reading his body gestures and the tone of his speech. For advocates, consultants and others who daily interact with their clients and persons from other walks of life, learning to interpret pays a lot. Sometimes during a handshake itself you can judge the nature or intention of the other person.
If a person who has mastered the interpretation of body language tries to fool you, there are still some natural gestures that lay bare his personality, because to hide and utilise all your body is next to impossible. When you are into courtship, there are some gestures of the opposite sex that help you a lot and save you from unnecessary humiliation. Your gestures change according to your mood. Hence learning this special science is very necessary.
I dont consider myself as the most learned guy on body language. Still, I feel confident that my experience in this field can help my readers a lot. After poring through many books written by experts and putting to practice their advice and tips, I decided to give expression to all my experience in the shape of a book. Many books on the subject are available in the market. But most of them are written by foreign authors, hence very few concepts are of help to Indian readers. In our own literature also, modern as well as ancient, we come across all detailed explanations on gesture reading. After developing a fair understanding of these explanations, I have written the present book in which emphasis has been laid to help you interpret the latent meaning behind gestures in the Indian context. Still, there are some common gestures which one sees in use all over the world.
I am sure my readers would really learn and enjoy a lot while reading this book. If you have any problem or query, write to me so that I can help you. Your suggestions regarding this book are always welcome.
Vinay Mohan Sharma
Understanding Body Language
Whenever we talk to or come across someone, either an acquaintance or an unknown person, we communicate with the person through numerous gestures. These gestures reflect our mental state of how we are feeling or observing things. If we are not in a good mood or a little desperate, we become rather irritated and give out defensive gestures. When happy, we feel rather relaxed and active. Our mood predominantly controls most of our body gestures and signals. Even the people we meet try to read our gestures. And, what they think of our personality is reflected through their remarks like, "You are looking smart today," or "Has anything wrong happened" or "Hey! Whom youre going to kill today?" This particular ability to read others gestures is acquired through experience.