Patrick King - The Science of Likability: Charm, Wit, Humor, and the 16 Studies That Show You How To Master Them

Like many college underclassmen that had no idea what they wanted to study, I chose to major in psychology.

I thought it was a good default choice because the knowledge theoretically had wide application and could transfer to any other field Also, I heard that the classes had mostly multiple-choice exams and finals.

But really, I could have done much worse, as psychology has turned out to have some pretty helpful applications to my life and career.

The study of psychology isnt about reading minds or interpreting dreams, though I had a fair amount of people asking about that. Its simply the study of why people do the things they do. When you frame it that way, its easy to see why that knowledge is useful in all walks of life.

There were the obvious applications such as discovering exactly what works in advertisements and why, how to effectively use reverse psychology, and even why we dont feel compelled to take action when were surrounded by a crowd. These were things I could immediately see and feel in my daily life.

But the biggest takeaway from my degree, a bachelor of science in clinical psychology, was that so many of our decisions are made subconsciously and without any awareness on our part. It often isnt until far after we act that we rationalize why.

For example, one of the more famous experiments in psychology was called the Little Albert experiment. It involved a baby who was presented with a white rat by itself. The baby had no reaction, positive or negative.

Next, the researchers paired the rat with a loud crashing noise, which obviously scared Albert. After only a couple of exposures with the noise, Albert was presented with the rat alone again. He had become afraid of the rat by itself.

He had started associating the rat with the loud noise that he hated, and likely wasnt aware of why he was suddenly recoiling and crying whenever he saw the rat.

This was fascinating how something seemingly so subtle and unrelated could affect peoples actions in very real ways.

If people can be subconsciously conditioned about negative associations, arent there ways that people can be conditioned to react positively to objects and people? What if Little Albert was conditioned to associate positive things with the rat, such as food or his favorite toy?

This brings up possibly the most famous psychological experiment of modern day, Pavlovs dog.

Pavlov began to ring a bell every time he fed his dog. Dogs salivate when they sense that food is nearby. When he started simply ringing the bell by itself, the dog salivated as if there was actual food coming. The dog thought he was getting bacon every time he heard the bell without any real clue why.

So in short, yes its completely possible to become scientifically likable, and have people wonder why you arent present.

I set out to find the best psychological studies in existence whose conclusions could be interpreted to increase how likable someone is the ones that literally made you scientifically likable in proven ways.

A couple of these studies might seem to be proving obvious common sense, but thats only because what was subconscious is now conscious knowledge. Many of these studies have proven phenomena on likability that is extremely insightful, and perhaps even counterintuitive to human nature and psychology.

Fact is, they all work because of how our brains have been programmed over thousands of years. We dont always realize when or how, but they undeniably form an image of someone who you just cant help wanting around.

The 16 studies in this book will show you proven ways to make yourself endearing, likable, funny, convincing, persuasive, trustworthy, credible, and instantly magnetic. Why we hit it off with some people, but never with others. Thats the science of likability.

Our leaders, politicians, and most charismatic friends arent that way just by chance and luck! Whether or not they realize it, they embody much of what is taught in this book. Now its your turn.