r.h. sin - I Hope This Reaches Her in Time

I hope this reaches her in time

good women are tired of giving their love to people who do nothing but break their spirit mighty women are tired of using their strength to hold on to relationships that arent worthy of their energy these women are capable of walking away and they will eventually the girl you took for granted will take her love and give it to herself and someday someone better than you will love her in all the ways you couldnt the joy is replaced with sadness your expectations become disappointment the truth was just an attractive lie a bunch of letters forming words that came together to create sentences of manipulation the heart becomes cold as if to lose its summer the soul becomes tired you and your restless spirit whats behind those dead eyes you wear that blank expression like new skin you wear sadness like the latest fashion you wear pain like garments youve been draped in anguish dont you miss who you were before who you became took over your life do you miss yourself like i miss you do you even remember what it felt like to be happy have you forgotten yourself beneath your troubles and all of this for a love that turned out to be hatred all of this for a heart that never deserved yours all of this hurt for a relationship that would never work all of yourself all of everything invested into something that now feels like nothing drops of rain on windows the city looks like you as melancholy fills the streets the chill in the air feels like your breath and the weather resembles everything that sits within your soul you are cold at times numb you run from the feeling of it all sometimes you simply walk but either way it all catches up to you like darkness consuming light and you are once more reminded of all the things you force yourself to forget arent you tired of this shit the constant struggle the feeling of loneliness while lying next to the one who promised to love you but never kept their word waiting for change afraid to accept that it wont get better arent you tired of their shit the back and forth not knowing where you stand the wars, all this fighting without the feeling of victory all youve felt is defeat the girl who deserves the sun is tired of being rained on the girl you dont appreciate will get tired of loving you my generation is filled with lovers who will never know the true meaning of love relationships that feel more like a prison term and a happiness that is simply a delusion my generation, filled with chaos no peace, its difficult, its complicated its nothing, it hurts, it gets worse you should have loved her
when she cared you should have tried harder for her 1:11 one day youll miss her one day youll understand there will be nights filled with darkness and you will look for her light there will be nights where sleep will escape you and your mind will think of what is gone she, like memories will run through your brain like blood surging through veins and youll reach for her hand then find yourself lost she could have been the love of your life but you refused to love her she could have been your soul mate but i guess youll never know and so the loneliness will grow from the emptiness you feel those nights will be the toughest those mornings, even tougher itll hurt, you should have loved her the pain you feel will be the same heartache you put her through and now you know youll finally understand how much it hurts to want someone who doesnt want you you were the emptiness i felt you were darkness consuming me you were the thing keeping me from happiness i was the ocean you wanted rivers i was the moon you chased the stars i needed to find myself but you were keeping me from me the years i spent losing myself while trying to keep you 1:11 in the morning my heart is searching for a feeling that doesnt hurt my mind just wants to think of something thatll make me smile my heart breaks with yours my soul, just as restless as your own i fall beside you i understand your silence and you are not alone you deserve so much more than what youve been given you owe it to yourself to give yourself the love that youve misplaced in others you are more than just a body count you are more than just a conquest you are more than just a name on the list of hearts they took advantage of and even after it happens you will always be more than they deserved we find time to waste remembering the faces we struggle to erase we give energy to those who give nothing in return we learn the hard way but instead of letting go we stay we love we fall in love with relationships filled with hate we become content with giving ourselves to the wrong mate crashing into walls worsening our wounds deepening the bruises the endless cycle of recycling relationships that no longer deserve our attention being attentive to lovers who pretend to care constantly showing up for others who are never there you are chained to the past its time to free yourself its almost as if her soul is a pack of wolves shes brave, shes strong shes unstoppable you can miss people but you dont have to want them back you can forgive people but you dont have to give them second chances 121914 she made oceans with her tears she used the heartache as motivation to build the boat in hopes of sailing far away from everything and everyone who hurt her the moon is watching you it hears your sighs it witnesses your struggles to close your eyes she wore loneliness in a smile she hid the sadness with laughter the clouds dance around each other like lovers avoiding the truth all of her stars are burning cry empty yourself of all the pain he caused you i was killing me to give us life i was drowning to save the person who kept pushing my head under water your absence taught me how to be my own lover you will be ready when it is time for your heart to fight back against the one who hurt you girls like you have roses inside of them that are strong enough to bloom through blizzards you began as roots but you blossom into more you are not your past be here, be present be more relationships end but your story mustnt finish someday your soul will no longer linger in places where pain exist i wont judge you or criticize you for doing what youve done i only wish you saw what i see when i look at you i only wish you wished for more than what youve settled for you are not a phase you are not some trend you are more than just something to do for the moment more than a hobby more than you may even know you are more and you deserve more than what theyre willing to give you you, reading this your eyes dancing on this page you, the one who knows how it feels to have their heart racing out of their chest overrun with anxiety desperate for relief it is you who wants to be loved understood for everything that you are it is you, the one reading this the one who is close to tears so close to breaking it is you who will save yourself because this is what youve always done because you are strong enough to do so there are so many wars going on at night so many hearts are fighting to survive without light the darkness contains everything we should forget the regrets are magnified the night is plagued with what ifs dancing to the silence of the night we sway like a bed of roses in the wind he only loved you in the dark in secret behind closed bedroom doors he was yours until he came and then he left whenever he was done draining you of everything he never deserved arent you tired of a love that feels less than everything you claimed you wanted has your soul grown weary of being with someone who only wants you for a nut someone who cums but never stays your heart deserves better i was standing here the whole time my heart in my hand prepared for commitment and eager to love but you didnt see me until after it failed with the others and i decided not to be your second choice your last ditch effort at love i refused to be the one you chose after the ones you overlooked me for refused to choose you i was standing here the whole time but you decided not to see me maybe the bad boys arent good enough for you it was raining in the park that day she was sitting on a bench mid may, wearing the eyes of sadness and for the life of me i couldnt tell if she was crying because her tears would have blended in with the rain her soul as dark as the afternoon sky and i said nothing but wondered why the girl sitting alone hand clutching her phone at a loss for words with so much pain in her heart thought it was royal but all i see is fake kings claiming a throne they dont deserve to sit on reaching for a crown they dont deserve to wear he calls but mostly when he needs something havent you noticed pretending to give a damn about your day just to get his way the manipulation hurts but youll sit there and make excuses for him seeing what you want hearing one thing and thinking another whatever helps with the delusional because the truth is so much harder to accept foolish of me to believe that a dysfunctional family could function in a way that made me feel loved just like any and everything else things are never what they seem people change or maybe they simply revert back to everything theyre supposed to be you mean to tell me that youre so afraid of being alone that youve decided to hold on to the one person who makes you feel lonely even while sitting beside them you keep saying you want real love and yet youve chosen to entertain the same person who will never love you the heart wants what it wants and its too bad that the heart your heart doesnt want the one who deserves you id tell you to let go but youll just say its easier said than done typical predictable claiming to be in love with someone who has done nothing to make you feel loved someone who has done nothing but make you hate yourself and sometimes you hate them just the same i wish your desire to be happy somehow outweighed your tolerance for the heartache theyve caused you are we still pretending that it doesnt hurt holding on to broken relationships in hopes that some day theyll work are we still holding on using the last bit of strength we have on lovers who only wish to use us up then toss us out like a piece of notebook filled with errors are we still listening to lies believing in liars who say whatever they need to say just to get another opportunity to hurt us are we hurting yet saying nothing its painful but weve kept quiet in hopes that things will change are we... are you... am i... your father the first man you knew the first man youd love one half of the reason why you grew up so hard so young and yet your heart began to ache breaking into a million pieces as you alone would learn to pick yourself up your father the first man to disappoint you the first man to let you down the first man to cause you to lower your expectations he loved you, yes but i guess not enough to protect you while you loved him enough to look past his failures youd go on to accept his half ass efforts to love you youd go on to accept men and their half ass efforts to love you your father only present just enough for you to feel like you mattered your lovers only present enough to fool you into thinking they cared i used to wonder to myself how could you ever love a man who barely made an effort but then i witnessed your father as he barely tried and with tears in your eyes you said you loved him your father taught you how to love men who reminded you of him the broken girls are the flowers of the earth they grow through tough conditions they bloom for themselves a man child will love you quietly but a real man will be loud in his appreciation of your heart i hope your flowers bloom through the rain you dont even see how often the stars perform for you in the middle of every night the heartache will teach you then peace will fill you broken girls blossom into warriors beneath a jacket two sizes larger than your body your arms folded as if to keep your secret you hid yourself from the world because the world betrayed you the robbing of your innocence an inappropriate touch behind those walls behind the barriers that keep the world from your heart is a woman worth fighting for behind those walls that tall, strong separation from the world lives a love worth wishing for you are greater than what has happened you are far more greater than the what occurred in your past behind those walls behinds that cement that has kept others from hurting you like the ones from before lives a love that only you can provide a love like yours is worth climbing the wall that sits in front of your heart what we love should inspire us who we love should inspire our strength but you have fallen for hands not worthy of your skin you have fallen for a mind that will never understand your value you have fallen for a heart incapable of loving you the way you need what we love what you love should feel like paradise during the storm the person you love should feel like stillness during an earthquake but youve fallen for someone who will never be able to be brave enough to fall for you the night will fade away and so will the darkness the moon will float into the abyss and the sun will announce itself with a ray of light and hope and warmth and beauty the morning will come the day will begin and the corners of my room the dark corners of my room will be filled with a light that will kill off all the things and all the pain that haunts me during the rising of the moon the sun will sit in the sky and it will shine providing its light giving me enough time and a peace of mind to evade you because you live in the midnights where i feel hopeless filled with despair you live in the night the darkness, the restlessness the air of uncertainty you live in the moments where my eyes cannot close you survive in shattered dreams and the bruising of my soul but just like the night you fade behind the horizon and just like the sun i rise, possibly brighter and stronger than before the morning will come the day will begin and you will be forgotten once more miss me like archers with bad aim lose me like hands on a rope incapable of holding on regret leaving me like the sun does the sky my absence like a slow death that youll struggle to survive look for me like eyes struggling through darkness reach for me like lungs struggling for air search for me like the meaning of words search for me where you left me and i will no longer be there telling her that shes beautiful while destroying her confidence is abuse telling her you love her while acting as if you hate her is abuse filling her up with false hope with no intention of changing or doing better is abuse until next time, talk to you soon (call ends)Next page