Candice Jalili - Just Send the Text: An Experts Guide to Letting Go of the Stress and Anxiety of Modern Dating

PRAISE FOR JUST SEND THE TEXT

Candice is like the ghost whisperer of millennial dating. Whether youre just starting to put yourself out there or your hearts been broken too many times to count, shell meet you exactly where youre atjudgment free!

Iman Hariri-Kia, sex and relationships editor at Bustle

Dating books of the past twenty years will tell you that you can trick someone into loving you by playing games, and knowing the exact minute to second ratio for text backs. Jalili busts this notion out of the water with her acknowledging the real anxiety behind dating and how you are getting in your own way. Her humor, knowledge, and lived experience helps the women of 2020 to use our voices, know ourselves, and just send the text. When Jalili talks about Eunice, shes speaking about all of our inner anxious dependent voices, the one we feel shame and embarrassment about. Her humor and lived experiences allow us to look at that part of ourselves with an honest giggle and a breath to take a real look at ourselves and our part in the situation. Excited to share this book with my clients and colleagues!

Emmalee Bierly, LMFT, couples and sex therapist, owner of the West Chester Therapy Group, and co-host of The Shrink Chicks podcast

Just Send the Text is the dating advice book millennial women have been waiting for. Candice Jalili is the only writer who understands the extreme specificities of dating in the modern age, and her advice is fresh, relatable, and downright hilarious. Its impossible to finish Just Send the Text without feeling inspired to take the reins on your dating life.

Alexia LaFata, editor at New York magazine

In looking for love, a relationship should enhance your life rather than make you feel less than. Since self-doubt hijacks you from joy, Im happy Candice Jalili is encouraging people to trust their intuition to ultimately form more fulfilling connections, within and with others.

Jennifer Taitz, author of How to be Single and Happy

For half a decade, Ive loved devouring Candice Jalilis thousands upon thousands of sex and dating articles that span across every relevant byline on the internet. Just Send the Text takes Jalilis expert-driven advice and empowering message to a whole different level. In her heartfelt and bitingly real debut book, Jalili inspires a generation of young women to not only release themselves from the shackles of modern-day dating anxiety but to garner freedom and authenticity in every aspect of their lives. Make no mistake, Just Send the Text isnt just a book about falling in love with another person, its core message lies in learning how to fall in love with yourselfin all your messy, beautiful, unique glory. Jalilis whip-smart yet wildly accessible (and refreshingly humorous!) voice carries the key to the most life-enhancing lesson of all: how to get over the fear of rejection and live a life that honors your fabulous, wild, authenticity.

Zara Barrie, author of Girl, Stop Passing Out in Your Makeup: The Bad Girls Guide to Getting Your Sh*t Together

As the former sex and relationships editor at Cosmopolitan, Elite Daily, and Womens Health, I wish I had Just Send the Text to give to every reader, podcast listener, and friend who ever asked me for advice. This book has EVERY ANSWER that anyone whos currently dating or in a situationship could possibly need. And, the best part is, Candice delivers it all in her signature hilarious and self-effacing way. She also fact checks every truism with real stories from real people, plus cold, hard science (that honestly, even long-term couples should familiarize themselves with). If youve ever had one of those moments where your heart is beating a million times a minute, your face is hot AF, the hairs on your arms are standing up, and your breath is caught in your throat because you have no idea what to do next with that person you like, do yourself a huge solid and read this book. Im not overselling it when I say the lessons in here will change your life. Trust me: Im a former Eunice, too.

Faye Brennan editor-in-chief of Eat This, Not That!

If dating ever makes you anxious, this book is a must-read. Candice gets itand her signature blend of empathy and humor will have you hooked. This book feels like a hug from your wise big sister whos been in your shoes.

Hannah Orenstein, author of Head Over Heels

Jalilis Just Send the Text is an absolute must-read for any woman battling dating anxiety (hi, all of us!). Each page helpsand encourages the reader in a super cute older sister-y kind of waylet go of the stress that comes with planning dates, initiating the first move, and the dreaded reply time debate. Be prepared to share this book with your group chat because, yup, you will feel personally victimized by the advice in here, you will think Omg, its me! every two pages, and you will be a better dater because of it. Promise.

Taylor Andrews, assistant editor at Cosmopolitan

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Copyright 2021 by Candice Jalili

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First Tiller Press trade paperback edition February 2021

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Interior design by Lewelin Polanco

Cover design by Patrick Sullivan

Author photo by Nathan Bajar

Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data has been applied for.

ISBN 978-1-9821-5478-3

ISBN 978-1-9821-5479-0 (ebook)

To all my fellow Eunices

L ets set the scene here: It was my sophomore year of college in the early 2010s at Santa Clara Universitygo, Broncos!and I was sure that I was in love with a junior boy who was by no means my boyfriend. Lets call him Jack. Jack and I first met when a mutual friend set us up for my sororitys winter formal.

Full disclosure: It was college, it was a sorority date event, and I was drunk, so I dont quite remember every detail of what went down between Jack and me that night. But Ill tell you what I do remember. We met at the most clichd of college locations: a pregame in a grimy off-campus apartment that took place before the actual formal. We split a bottle of Andr at the pregameagain, so collegeand he made fun of the saltines I kept in my purse to snack on. At the actual event, we agreed the catered Chinese food was bad and we had a few dance-offs, during which I failed to do the Funky Chicken with my heels on. Oh, and at some point, we made a bet about something I cannot for the life of me remember, but it involved me kissing him at midnight if I lost. At the end of the night, Ishockerlost whatever bet we made, and we kissed outside my dorm. By this point, I was certain that I had met the love of my life. I even still remember the first text he ever sent me: Its Jack. Only use this number if absolutely necessary. It came about five minutes after our good-night kiss.