Harvest House Publishers. - How Can I Be Sure?

Unless otherwise indicated all Scripture verses are taken from The Living Bible, Copyright 1971 owned by assignment by Illinois Regional Bank N. A. (as trustee). Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved. Printed in the United States of America. 05 06 07 08 09 10 11 12 / VP / 13 12 11 10 9 8 7 6 Former director of the Northwest Counseling Center and the Fresno Counseling Center Executive director of Hume Lake Christian Camps Graduate of Biola University, La Mirada, California Graduate of California State University, Fresno, with a Masters in Counseling Graduate work with Fuller Seminary and The United States International University in the field of counseling Graduate of Trinity Seminary, Newburg, Indiana, with a Ph.D. in Counseling Licensed marriage, family, and child counselor Author of over 60 books with sales totaling more than 5 million copies Popular speaker in family-life seminars, churches, and conferences Devoted Christian husband and father of two children and believes that his family ranks at the top of his system of priorities and values I would like to extend a personal word of thanks to the following individuals who took time out of their busy schedules, to read this manuscript and make comments and suggestions:
Dr. in Counseling Licensed marriage, family, and child counselor Author of over 60 books with sales totaling more than 5 million copies Popular speaker in family-life seminars, churches, and conferences Devoted Christian husband and father of two children and believes that his family ranks at the top of his system of priorities and values I would like to extend a personal word of thanks to the following individuals who took time out of their busy schedules, to read this manuscript and make comments and suggestions:
Dr.

Vince Bloom, associate professor of speech communications at California State University, Fresno Dr. Henry Brandt, counseling psychologist Dr. Ray Brewer, professor of education at California State University, Fresno Richard Dickenson, professor of psychology at El Camino College and licensed marriage, family and child counselor Dr. Howard Hendricks, chairman of the Dept. of Christian Education, Dallas Theological Seminary Dr. Tim LaHaye, founder and president of Family Life Seminars and author of numerous books Dr.

Jeanne ODell, clinical psychologist and licensed marriage, family and child counselor Ken Poure, extension director for Hume Lake Christian Camps and director of Accent Crusades, Inc. Dr. Earl Radmacher, president of Western Baptist Seminary, Portland, Oregon Dr. Ray Stedman, pastor of the Peninsula Bible Church, Palo Alto and author of numerous books Dr. Jay Stevans, associate pastor of Northwest Church, Fresno, California Dr. Paul Sundstrom, professor of pastoral psychology, Western Baptist Seminary, Portland, Oregon Rev.

Rick Yohn, pastor of Evangelical Free Church of Fresno, California, and author of numerous books To Ken Poure Man of GodLeader of menSpiritual father in the faithMy best friendContents I hurt! No, Im not feeling any physical pain, I hurt emotionally. My pain comes from the anguish and suffering I have shared listening to couples relate to me the despair, frustration, and sense of hopelessness they are experiencing in their marriages. I am a counselor, so my job is to listen and to help. But I do more than listen, I suffer with these couples. Part of my anguish comes from the realization that many of the problems I hear could have been avoided. So many times I have thought, If only I could have counseled with this couple before they were married. As a busy counselor, I found that I was not only becoming involved with more and more divorce cases, but also with more and more premarital counseling.

As I became involved in premarital counseling, I discovered a different type of frustration. How many sessions should I spend with a couple? What material should we cover? How much is enough? How can we approach sensitive subjects? Jonathan Swift said, Necessity is the mother of invention. The need for tools to help build strong foundations for marriage coupled with my frustration in premarital counseling led to the creation of this premarriage inventory. This inventory is not an answer book for marriage problems. Many of those types of books have already been written and are available. This inventory is a discussion guide to help couples open up important channels of communication; express their thoughts, desires, and feelings to each other; and enhance their growing relationship together.

Each person should have a personal copy in which to write his or her own responses. If you will honestly share with each other your thoughts and feelings with regard to the questions, your future marriage will begin on a strong, firm, and mutually satisfying foundation. Married couples can also benefit from a review of the questions. Discussing your responses together will help improve your communication and clarify any misunderstandings that may exist. Your love for each other will be revived, restored, and reinforced. It is my prayer that you will find help and encouragement in these pages for your marriage and that God will be glorified as a result.

Bob Phillips Fresno, California For Pastors and Counselors This book is designed to be a helpful tool in your hands. Therefore, you may want to present copies to the couple you are counseling or have both parties purchase their own copy. In premarital counseling, it will be helpful to have the couple fill out the first three chapters prior to the initial session. A lot of time can be lost in counseling when either party or both have not considered certain topics ahead of time. This is complicated even further if the couple is embarrassed with the presentation of material that they have not yet discussed together. This is especially true in the area of sexual or financial topics.

Many couples have no idea what is involved in premarital counseling. This inventory helps to eliminate some of the fear and frustration and will greatly enhance the quality of the counseling sessions. The inventory will also help to add consistency to your premarital counseling program. The couples should be encouraged to complete the various homework assignments and bring the inventory with them to each session. In developing this inventory, I have suggested six counseling sessions prior to the wedding. Some pastors or counselors may find fewer sessions satisfactory, while others may wish to meet more often.

As you use the premarriage inventory, you will find it adaptable to your particular style of counseling. Obviously, not every question mentioned needs to be covered in the presence of the pastor or counselor. Six counseling sessions would not be enough to cover all the material in this inventory. Certain key questions may be covered, or the counseling session could revolve around problem questions that the couple encountered prior to meeting with the pastor or counselor. Use those questions that would be most beneficial to the couple you may be counseling. Here is a suggested breakdown of the material for six counseling sessions.

Prior to the first counseling session Assign chapters 1, 2, and 3 to be completed Session 1 Discuss material in chapters 1, 2, and 3 Assign chapters 4 and 5 as homework for Session 2 Session 2 Discuss material in chapters 4 and 5 Assign chapter 6 as homework for Session 3 Session 3 Discuss material in chapter 6 Assign chapter 7 as homework for Session 4 Session 4 Discuss material in chapter 7 Assign chapter 8 as homework for Session 5 Session 5 Discuss material in chapter 8 Assign chapters 9 and 10 as homework for Session 6 Session 6 Discuss material in chapters 9 and 10 Tie together any loose ends.