Brenda Schaeffer - Loving Me, Loving You: Balancing Love and Power in a Codependent World
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Loving Me, Loving You: Balancing Love and Power in a Codependent World
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This is a basic guide to creating more loving relationships. Filled with explanations and activities, Loving Me, Loving You shows us how to transform our lives and our environment for the better. These changes come with an understanding of love, power, and transformation the relationship between love and spirituality power sharing at home and in the world To learn more about healthy relationships, visit Brenda Schaeffer. (www.loveandaddiction.com)
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Loving You Loving Me : Balancing Love and Power in a Codependent World
author
:
Schaeffer, Brenda.
publisher
:
Hazelden Publishing
isbn10 | asin
:
0894867474
print isbn13
:
9780894867477
ebook isbn13
:
9780585311968
language
:
English
subject
Intimacy (Psychology) , Man-woman relationships.
publication date
:
1991
lcc
:
BF575.I5S33 1991eb
ddc
:
158.2
subject
:
Intimacy (Psychology) , Man-woman relationships.
Page i
Loving Me, Loving You
Page ii
About the Author:
Brenda Schaeffer is author of the popular book Is It Love or Is It Addiction? and the four pamphlets in Hazelden's Healthy Relationship Series. A licensed psychologist and a certified transactional analyst, she lectures nationally and internationally. She is an experienced psychotherapist, trainer of therapists, lecturer, and communications consultant. She has trained with experts in hypnosis, Gestalt, bioenergetics, visual imagery, existential, transpersonal, regression, and developmental psychologies.
A Clinical and Provisional Teaching Member of the International Transactional Analysis Association, she is Director of Brenda M. Schaeffer and Associates in Minneapolis, where she conducts training, workshops, and therapy.
Page iii
Loving Me, Loving You
Balancing Love and Power in a Codependent World
Brenda Schaeffer
Page iv
First published April 1991.
Copyright 1991, Brenda Schaeffer. All rights reserved. No portion of this publication may be reproduced in any manner without the written permission of the publisher.
ISBN: 0-89486-747-4 Printed in the United States of America. Library of Congress Catalog Card Number: 90-85023
Editor's note:
Hazelden Educational Materials offers a variety of information on chemical dependency and related areas. Our publications do not necessarily represent Hazelden's programs, nor do they officially speak for any Twelve Step organization.
The vignettes in this book are composites of actual situations and persons. The autobiographies are real, although the names have been changed. Other names and events have been created by the author for illustrative purposes. Any resemblance to specific persons, living or dead, or specific events, is entirely coincidental.
The following publishers have generously given permission to use extended quotations from copyrighted works:
From The Ages of Gaia, by James Lovelock. Copyright 1988 by W. W. Norton & Company, Inc. Reprinted with permission.
From The Tangled Wing, by Melvin Konner. Copyright 1983 by Henry Holt and Company, Inc. Reprinted with permission.
From The Chalice and the Blade, by Riane Eisler. Copyright 1988 by HarperCollins Publishers. Reprinted with permission.
From The Prophet, by Kahlil Gibran. Copyright 1969 by Alfred A. Knopf. Reprinted with permission.
Page v
Contents
Acknowledgments
vi
Introduction
1
1 Love, Power, and Transformation
15
2 Love and Power in Crisis
35
3 Healing: From Script to Autonomy
65
4 Transformation: From Autonomy to Spirituality
93
5 The Spiritual Lover in You
115
6 Laws of Transformation
139
7 Love as a Process
155
8 Power Sharing
177
9 Transforming the World
195
Epilogue
213
Appendix
217
Endnotes
219
Bibliography
225
Index
229
Page vi
Acknowledgments
The authoring of this book has been a spiritually transforming experience. I recognize I am different, having been honored with "its" task. I could not have known beforehand that each day would speak to me of the very theme I write about: balancing love and power.
I am deeply appreciative of the many relationships that provided nourishment, challenging feedback, and support throughout the process. In these relationships, I was reminded that we are not islands but profoundly connected, and that it is in this connectedness that miracles unfold and ideas become creations. I wish to thank Doug Toft for his sensitive editorial feedback and taking the time to truly know me; Sally Graham for her wonderful spirit and willingness to work odd hours to meet typing deadlines; and Hazelden editor Rebecca Post for respecting professional meanings behind my words and representing me so well to her colleagues. In addition, I want to thank Hazelden editors Jeff Petersen and Don Freeman for their work.
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