Tim Kimmel - 50 Ways to Really Love Your Kids. Simple Wisdom and Truths for Parents

50
ways
to really
love your
kids

Dr. Tim Kimmel

2006 by Tim Kimmel

All rights reserved. No portion of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system or transmitted in any form by any meansexcept for brief quotations in printed reviewswithout the prior written permission of the publisher.

Published in Nashville, Tennessee, by Thomas Nelson. Thomas Nelson is a registered trademark of Thomas Nelson, Inc.

The New King James Version (NKJV) 1979, 1980, 1982, 1992, Thomas Nelson, Inc., Publisher. Used by permission.
New Century Version (NCV). Copyright 1987, 1988, 1991 by Thomas Nelson, Inc. All rights reserved. Used by permission.
The King James Version of the Bible (KJV).
The New International Version of the Bible (NIV) 1984 by the International Bible Society. Used by permission of Zondervan Bible Publishers.

Design: The DesignWorks Group; cover, David Uttley; interior, Robin Black
www.thedesignworksgroup.com

Project Editor: Kathy Baker

ISBN 978-1-4041-0325-2

Printed and bound in China
10 11 12 13 14 WA 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2

www.timkimmel.com | www.familymatters.net

GLUE DOWN

a gift for

from

May you continue to grow
in love, wisdom, and joy
in your family.

Dedicated to

LYDIA JOY MURRAY

Theres got to be at least 50 ways
to also really love a granddaughter.
Im going to spend the rest of my life
practicing them on you.

YOUR PAPA

Whoever receives one of these little children
in My name receives Me;
and whoever receives Me, receives not Me
but Him who sent Me.

MARK 9:37 NKJV

GIVE YOUR KIDS...

Introduction

Love the Lord your God with all your heart,
all your soul, all your strength, and all your mind.
Also, Love your neighbor as you love yourself.

LUKE 10:27 NCV

New things just keep coming up with kids.

New clothes, new fads, new toys, new friends,

new distractions.

New health guidelines, new school standards,

new drivers license requirements.

New joys, new heartaches, new victories, new setbacks.

New hopes, new questions.

Because we love our kidsreally love themwere always on the lookout for new ways to make their precious lives even better.

So how about finding new ways to love them? Thats where this little book can make a big difference. Here are fifty practical ways (plus a bonus one thrown in for good measure) that can sharpen your ability to bring the best out of your children. Because you obviously love your kids, youre no doubt already doing a lot of these recommendations. Good for you! But love is one of those dimensions in life that can always grow to new and more effective levels. And like all parents want to do a good job of loving their kids, youre not satisfied to let your love remain limited, stunted, or static. Thus: 50 Ways to Really Love Your Kids. Many of these recommendations probably have never crossed your mind before, but you desperately need to consider them as you put the finishing touches on your son or daughters childhood. By the time you finish the last vignette in this book you are going to have the insight needed to raise kids who grow up to be great adults. Let me encourage you to give them all a try.

My child, listen
to your fathers teaching
and do not forget
your mothers advice.

PROVERBS 1:8 NCV

Parenting is a sacred trust. You have been given an opportunity to teach your children how to live large and love deeply. Let these fifty-one ways help you set examples that will inspire and encourage your kids to a better and more satisfying future... all the way to forever.

GIVE YOUR KIDS

Love that is Secure

When did you first fall in love with your child? For some moms, it was about ten seconds after they saw the two lines on their home pregnancy test. For sure, the earliest movement from the miracle growing inside of them drew an echo of I love you from somewhere in the corners of their hearts. Dads sometimes take a bit longer to make the connection. But for certain, when we look into the eyes of that little life placed in our arms, the deal is sealed. We are in love.

Its safe to say that almost all parents love their children. But loving your childand even doing things to show your lovedoes not necessarily translate into a secure love.

Secure love? Whats that?

Im talking about that steady, sure, and unwavering love that we must not fail to write on the hard drives of our childrens souls. Its a complete love that they can default to when their hearts are under attack. Its the kind of love that children can confidently carry with them into the future.

Secure love is the stuff that helps them continue moving forward when they just got sucker punched by circumstances. Like when theyve given their hearts to someone who has just told them they dont love them anymore, or the bottom falls out of their financial world, or they get fired, or framed, or betrayed. Its the love that keeps them confident when theyre wearing a uniform, standing a lonely post, and facing a merciless enemy far from the safety of home.

Adapted from Grace-Based Parenting and Little House on the Freeway

Ive got great news! You can set the foundation for this secure love. All you need to do is go to the source of a love that knows no boundaries and has no limits. A God who would cross the threshold of time, walk down a back street of civilization, and climb up on a cross that was meant for us knows how to help us love like that. And the better news is that He offers that love to anyone who asks for it.

GIVE YOUR KIDS

Love Without Conditions

Heres a problem: standard offtherack love comes with too many strings attached. Few things block our ability to connect to the hearts of our children more than a love that says, Ill love you if, or... because, or... when, or... after certain arbitrary conditions have been met. That kind of love makes it hard for kids to keep a smile on their face, a gleam in their eye, or a bounce in their step.

Our children need an I love you... period kind of love, and they need it most from the people they care about mostMom and Dad. They need to know that improvement on their part isnt going to get us to love them more, and that we wont love them any less if they have a bad day, or even a series of them.

This is where a welldefined love comes to the rescue. When we start with an unencumbered understanding of what unconditional love looks like, its easiera lot easier to make it part of the DNA of our role as parents.

Ive got a definition of love that you can take to the bank! This stuff works! Love is: