Jim Burns - The Purity Code: Gods Plan for Sex and Your Body

THE PURITY CODE

Books by

Jim Burns

FROM BETHANY HOUSE PUBLISHERS

________________________

Accept Nothing Less

Closer (with Cathy Burns)

Confident Parenting

Creating an Intimate Marriage

God Made Your Body

How God Makes Babies

The Purity Code

Teaching Your Children Healthy Sexuality

Audio CD; DVD & Curriculum Kit also available

Parents Kit also available: The Purity Code,

Teaching Your Children Healthy Sexuality,

and special Audio Resource CD

JIM BURNS

THE PURITY CODE

GOD'S PLAN FOR SEX AND YOUR BODY

The Purity Code: Gods Plan for Sex and Your Body
Copyright 2008
Jim Burns

Cover design by Lookout Design, Inc.
Interior illlustrations by Luke Daab, Daab Creative

Unless otherwise identified, Scripture quotations are from the HOLY BIBLE, NEW INTERNATIONAL VERSION. Copyright 1973, 1978, 1984 by International Bible Society. Used by permission of Zondervan Publishing House. All rights reserved.

Scripture quotations indentified NKJV are from the New King James Version of the Bible. Copyright 1979, 1980, 1982 by Thomas Nelson, Inc. Used by permission. All rights reserved.

Scripture quotations identified NLT are from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.

Scripture quotations identified TLB are from the The Living Bible 1971 owned by assignment by Illinois Regional Bank N.A. (trustee). Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.

Scripture quotations identified CEV are from the Contemporary English Version. Copyright American Bible Society 1995. Used by permission.

All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any meanselectronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording, or otherwisewithout the prior written permission of the publisher. The only exception is brief quotations in printed reviews.

Published by Bethany House Publishers
11400 Hampshire Avenue South
Bloomington, Minnesota 55438

Bethany House Publishers is a
division of Baker Publishing Group, Grand Rapids, Michigan

Printed in the United States of America

Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data

Burns, Jim, 1953
The Purity Code : Gods plan for sex and your body / Jim Burns.
p cm. (Pure foundations)

Summary: Family and parenting authority Jim Burns explores the tough and sensitive issues of sexuality, preparing preteens for their adolescent years. Presents biblical values about sex, bodies, and relationshipsProvided by publisher.

ISBN 978-0-7642-0209-4 (pbk. : alk. paper) 1. SexReligious aspectsChristianity Juvenile literature. 2. Sex instruction for children. I. Title.

BT708.B8825 2008
241.66dc22

2008003433

To Steve and Sue Perry

I treasure our years of friendship. You inspire me with your
dedication, generosity, passion, and fun-loving spirits.

Acknowledgments

Thank you...

Cathy... After all these years, we still are trying to help kidsmake good decisions. Thank you for the decision you made to bemy bride and be a wonderful example of living the Purity Code.

Christy, Rebecca, Heidi, and now Dave... I am the mostfortunate man in the world to live my life with you.No one said it would ever be boring.

Dean Bruns... Your partnership in ministry and ever-growingfriendship is one of the highlights of my life.

Rod Emery, Rick Haugen, Randy Bramel, Lucie Moore,Geoff Moore, Bill Bauer, Bob Howard, and Jeff Armour...
There has never been a more effectiveExecutive Committee in the world. Your support, belief,challenge, and commitment truly amaze me.

Kyle Duncan, Greg Johnson, Natasha Sperling, Jeff Braun,and anyone else who worked onThe Purity Code... You broughtthis dream to life. May thousands of kids make the Code a part oftheir life. Thank you also for your patience with a flakey writer.

Cindy Ward... Once again we finish a project together.
You are a precious gift from God.

Contents

The most effective sex education takes place when parents talk with not totheir children about sexuality-related issues in an authentic manner. This is never easy and sometimes embarrassing, but parental involvement makes all the difference.

I wrote this book from the standpoint of a dad talking with his son or daughter. I have tried to address all the issues of today. Some parents may think the information is too blunt while others may think it is not direct enough. Your job is to adapt the material to fit what you believe is best for your kids. Nothing will replace the conversations you should have with your own children.

The most effective way to use this book is for both the parent and the child to read one chapter at a time, going through the questions at the end of each chapter before moving on. Some parents will literally read the chapters out loud with their child; others will read chapters separately from their child and then talk. Frankly, the dialogue that will follow is more important than what I have written, but the information here provides a foundation for those conversations. Even the manner in which you dialogue is important. Kids learn best when they talk and you listen. Dont use this as a chance to lecture. (That was my job!) Your job is to create a safe, loving environment to open up the conversation with your child about the life-changing subject of his or her sexuality.

Some churches and groups will use this book as a curriculum. Im excited about that. And yet, it is my hope that at least part of the teaching will include parental involvement.

The Purity Code Audio

A supplement to this book may be very helpful to you. We have produced two incredible one-hour CDs on the Purity Code. The student version is meant to be listened to by parents and their children together, and it was created to encourage dialogue. I invited noted experts in the field of sexuality to join me in pertinent discussions about various topics from the book. Some of the conversations were adapted from my daily radio broadcast heard around the country. Overall, the recordings are compelling and a bit entertaining, and again, they are provided to give you more opportunity for dialogue. The other CD is for parents only. I think you will find both CDs very much worth your time.

CHAPTER ONE
Introducing the Purity Code

Purity: Freedom from guilt or wrongdoing; innocence; virginity; physical chastity; freedom from inappropriate elements; virtue; the state of lacking a moral wrongdoing; honor.

Code: A set of standards to live by; a system or collection of values and regulations.

A growing movement of people your age are committing themselves to something called the Purity Code. Theyre going against what society considers normal, and theyre making a radical commitment to God, their family, and their future spouse to live a life of sexual integrity and purity. It is one of the wisest decisions they will ever make, with far-reaching positive results.