Joan H. McWilliams - Parenting Plans for Families After Divorce

The Creating Parenting Plans That Work booklet is terrificwhat a treasure of information about the needs of children and the damage of high conflict.

Carla Garrity, PhD.

The Neuro-Developmental Center and

Co-author of Children of Divorce

If you need a Parenting Plan, Joan McWilliams book is a must. Easy to use and read, full of useful tips and advice. Highly recommended.

Isolina Ricci, PhD.,

Author of Moms House, Dads House

I give a copy of Creating Parenting Plans That Work to all my clients when they first come in the office. I tell them that the book was written by a lawyer who not only knows what shes talking about, she also helped draft the Parental Responsibilities Act! The book puts all the important information in one easy-to-handle spot. When I meet with the client the next time they come in, they understand Parenting Plans, and, quite often, have started to draft their own! Creating Parenting Plans That Work is a tremendous helpsaves time and money!

Mark Leonard, Esq.

Brownstein Hyatt Farber Schreck LLP

The PeaceFinder shows you how to become the peace that you wish to see in the world.

Arun Gandhi

President, M.K. Gandhi Institute for

Nonviolence

A delightful poem with a message our world has never needed more. For every person who has thrown up his hands and asked But what can I do? The Peace Finder offers a simple yet profound answer. Join Riley McFee on his quest and become part of the solution. It may just change your life.

Stephanie Kane

Author of Blind Spot, Quiet Time and Seeds

of Doubt: A Crime Novel

Author Joan McWilliams has given us a grand idea in this charming, enlightening, and important book. Peaceenduring world peaceis within the reach of all of us; but, she says, we need to embrace that concept more than we entertain the rush to war as our default problem solving. Her straight-forward idea is told in a poem about a gifted young child (purity and innocence) finding his way through skeptics and nay-sayers to the mindful and conscious attainment of peace.

The world can no longer afford the catastrophic economic and psychological consequences of war and violence. McWilliams points out that finding peace is imperative to our survival and shows a positive way to contribute our energy to the solution. A life without violence? The Peacefinder shows us it is possible.

Mary Beth Starzel
Writer/Editor

Including A Special Section on
Child-Inclusive Parenting Plans

Also by Joan McWilliams

The PeaceFinder: Riley McFees Quest for World Peace Creating Parenting Plans That Work

McWilliams Mediation Group LTD
PO Box 6216
Denver, CO 80206

Copyright 2011 by Joan H. McWilliams, Esq.

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced or distributed in any form or by any means (written, electronic, mechanical, recording, photocopy or otherwise) or stored in a database or retrieval system, without the prior written permission of the author or publisher, except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical articles and reviews.

Books may be purchased in quantity and/or for special sales by contacting the publisher or author through the website:

www.McWilliamsMediation.com

email address:

address: McWilliams Mediation Group LTD

PO Box 6216, Denver, CO 80206

Or, by contacting your local bookstore.

Cover Design: NZ Graphics, Nick Zelinger

Layout Design: WESType Publishing Services, Inc., Ronnie Moore

Editing: The Book Shepherd, Judith Briles, and Editing By John,

John Maling

Cover Photo: Stephanie Secrest

Publisher: McWilliams Mediation Group LTD

Joan H. McWilliams, Esq.

Parenting Plans For Families After Divorce

Library of Congress Control Number: 2011902640

ISBN: 978-0-9768663-0-5 10 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 21

1. Divorce 2. Parenting 3. Family

Printed in Canada

This book is dedicated to
the parents and children of divorce
who recognize the importance
of maintaining a peaceful and
vibrant Post-Divorce Family.

P ART O NE :
Creating a Parenting Plan for Your Family

P ART T WO :
Listening to Your Children

P ART T HREE :
Making Your Parenting Plan Work

P ART F OUR :
Resources

Thank you for giving me the opportunity to share the Post-Divorce Family Model with you. As part of The New American Way of Divorce, the Post-Divorce Family Model seeks to replace the traditional approach to divorce that does not support you, your children or your family. It relies on new ideas and processes by which you can preserve your family (even after your divorce) rather than damage or destroy it. I use the word divorce throughout the book to include the dissolution of any relationship, including those of unmarried couples.

You wont find the term, Post-Divorce Family, in any law book, and you wont hear most judges discuss it. When people divorce, they make provisions for their children, but they lose sight of the big picture. The truth is that even though you and the other parent will live in separate houses and lead separate lives, both of you will continue to be part of your original family, and that family unit needs to be consciously restructured, loved and nurtured.

Relying on this philosophy, the new Post-Divorce Family Model:

• Starts very early in the divorce processbefore love turns to acrimony.
  
• Acknowledges that, while your family will take on a different form after your divorce, it will still exist and needs to be nourished.
  
• Discards the one size fits all approach to divorce.
  
• Recognizes that each family has different attributes and challenges.
  
• Provides creative processes and solutions that strive to meet the needs of each family member.
  
• Shows you how to design your own Post-Divorce Familyyou and the other parent make the decisionsnot the judge. This saves time, money and reduces stress.
  
• Suggests that you follow the five Cs:
  

1. Commit to your childrenthey must always come first.
   
2. Compartmentalizeyour angertake it away from the children.
   
3. Communicatewith the other parentyou still have to talk about the kids.
   
4. Consider