Emerson Eggerichs - Love and Respect Workbook: The Love She Most Desires; The Respect He Desperately Needs

LOVE &
RESPECT
Workbook

DR. EMERSON EGGERICHS
WITH
FRITZ RIDENOUR

LOVE & RESPECT WORKBOOK

Copyright 2005 by Emerson Eggerichs.

All rights reserved. No portion of this book may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any meanselectronic, mechanical, photocopy, recording, scanning, or otherexcept for brief quotations in critical reviews or articles, without the prior written permission of the publisher.

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Published in association with Yates and Yates, LLP, Attorneys and Literary Agents, Orange, California.

Unless otherwise marked, Scripture quotations are taken from The New American Standard Bible (NASB). Copyright 1960, 1962, 1963, 1968, 1971, 1972, 1973, 1975, 1977, 1995 by The Lockman Foundation. Used by permission.

Additional Scripture quotations are taken from the following sources: Contemporary English Version (CEV). Copyright 1995 by American Bible Society. Used by permission. The King James Version (KJV). Public domain. The Message (MSG) by Eugene H. Peterson. Copyright 1993, 1994, 1995, 1996, 2000, 2001, 2002. Used by permission of NavPress Publishing Group. All rights reserved. The Holy Bible, New International Version (NIV). Copyright 1973, 1978, 1984 by International Bible Society. Used by permission of Zondervan. All rights reserved. The New International Readers Version (NIRV). Copyright 1996, 1998 International Bible Society. All rights reserved throughout the world. Used by permission of International Bible Society. The New King James Version (NKJV). Copyright 1982 by Thomas Nelson, Inc. Used by permission. All rights reserved.

Cover Design: Charles Brock, UDG | DesignWorks, Inc.

Cover Photo: Steve Gardner, shootpw.com

Interior Design: Rainbow Graphics; Kingsport, TN.

ISBN-13: 9-781-59145-348-2

ISBN-10: 1-59145-348-8

Printed in the United States of America

07 08 09 10 11 RRD 12 11 10 9 8

CONTENTS

PART ONE
THE CRAZY CYCLE

Introduction

The Simple Secret to a Better Marriage

To Communicate, Decipher the Code

Why She Wont Respect; Why He Wont Love

What Men Fear Most Can Keep the Crazy Cycle Spinning

She Fears Being a Doormat; Hes Tired of Just Not Getting It

She Worries About Being a Hypocrite; He Complains, I Get No Respect!

She Thinks She Cant Forgive Him; He Says, Nobody Can Love That Woman!

PART TWO
THE ENERGIZING CYCLE

C-O-U-P-L-E: How to Spell Love to Your Wife

ClosenessShe Wants You to Be Close

OpennessShe Wants You to Open Up to Her

UnderstandingDont Try to Fix Her; Just Listen

Chapter 12 PeacemakingShe Wants You to Say, Im Sorry

LoyaltyShe Needs to Know Youre Committed

EsteemShe Wants You to Honor and Cherish Her

C-H-A-I-R-S: How to Spell Respect to Your Husband

ConquestAppreciate His Desire to Work and Achieve

HierarchyAppreciate His Desire to Protect and Provide

AuthorityAppreciate His Desire to Serve and to Lead

InsightAppreciate His Desire to Analyze and Counsel

RelationshipAppreciate His Desire for Shoulder-to-Shoulder Friendship

SexualityAppreciate His Desire for Sexual Intimacy

The Energizing Cycle Will Work If You Do

PART THREE
THE REWARDED CYCLE

Chapter 23 The Real Reason to Love and Respect

The Truth Can Make You Free, Indeed

: Pink and Blue Can Make Gods Purple

Welcome to the Love & Respect Workbook experience. You are about to discover and apply the single greatest secret to a successful marriage. Today, you and your mate can start fresh with the ground-breaking guidance that Dr. Emerson Eggerichs provides in this workbook and the book it accompaniesLove & Respect. These two books are designed to be companions, so youll benefit most if you have a copy of the book as well as this workbook.

Based on three decades of counseling experience, as well as scientific and biblical research, the book offers you the information and tools you will need to understand what is wrong in your relationship and begin the process of correcting it. The workbook gives you and your mate a private place to complete a wide variety of exercises that are crucial to the process of making Dr. Eggerichs breakthrough techniques a permanent part of your marriage.

Before you start your actual study, here are some helpful hints on how you can benefit most from your experience:

Come ready to let God help you work on your marriage. As you experience Love & Respect you will be amazed at how these two simple but powerful concepts can affect your marriage. This is no quick and easy fix, but if you are willing to spend a reasonable amount of time and effort, and make the tiniest of adjustments, this study will change you and your marriage for the better.

Study at your own pace and preference. Some of the questions are quite simpleothers take more thought and effort. But as you interact with Love & Respect concepts, you will begin to see what Emerson is talking about. In Emersons words, you will get it and once you have it, you will never be the same.

Get acquainted with how this workbook is constructed. It covers all the Love & Respect book in fourteen sessions. Some sessions cover one chapter of the book, and others cover as many as three chapters. As you go through each chapter, you will note that every subhead denotes a block or section of study, and generally there is at least one question for every section. The goal is to get you involved with what Emerson is saying, to see if you agree or disagree as you apply his concepts to your marriage. When some questions deal with difficult concepts, there is extra input and explanation in the form of Emersons Additional Commentary (see Workbook Appendix VI).

This workbook was designed to be used by both individuals and couples, so youll notice ICONS throughout that will help you understand which questions apply to you.

First, take note that the questions without icons apply to all readers. In each chapter, be sure to answer all these questions first. Then, take note of the three types of icons used in the workbook. There are certain questions designed especially for men, while others address women only. And some of the questions should be answered as a couple. Here is a quick review:

Unmarked questions should be answered first in each chapter by both the man and the woman.

Men answer these questions.

Women answer these questions.

Couples answer these questions together. Answer these questions last in each chapter.

You can study this book solo. The questions are written primarily for individuals and then for couples. Therefore, if your spouse is not yet interested in