kidswritejokes - Kids Write Jokes

Kids Write Jokes copyright 2019 by @kidswritejokes. All rights reserved. No part of this book may be used or reproduced in any manner whatsoever without written permission except in the case of reprints in the context of reviews. Andrews McMeel Publishing a division of Andrews McMeel Universal 1130 Walnut Street, Kansas City, Missouri 64106 www.andrewsmcmeel.com Originally published in 2018 by Blink Publishing. ISBN: 978-1-5248-5502-4 Library of Congress Control Number: 2019932499 Editor: Katie Gould Designer: Sierra Stanton Production Editor: Margaret Daniels Production Manager: Carol Coe Digital Production: Kristen Minter ATTENTION: SCHOOLS AND BUSINESSES Andrews McMeel books are available at quantity discounts with bulk purchase for educational, business, or sales promotional use. For information, please e-mail the Andrews McMeel Publishing Special Sales Department: .

For Molly, the funniest one of all

Introduction Once upon a time, the company I worked for launched a website for kids' jokes, andfortunately for meI was given the task of reviewing the jokes that were sent in. It became clear that children often have a very special view on what constitutes a "joke": they don't have to actually make any sense. At all. While I sat there at my desk moderating submissions, I started to realize that a lot of t he "incorrect" jokes I was rejecting were actually funnier than the ones I was letting through. Many of them made me laugh out loud in the office. I decided that the world deserved to share in that laughter, and my Tumblr account for Bad Kids Jokes was born.

It didn't take long for the online community to discover the content and, quite frankly, to go a bit crazy over it. And then the press got interested: The Times , Huffington Post , Rolling Stone , Mashable, and BuzzFeed all wrote articles about the site. The Independent published a story in the newspaper about it. It was mentioned on BBC Radio. Oh, plus Stephen Colbert and Sarah Silverman read some of the jokes aloud on The Late Show. Thrilled and amazed by the response, I relaunched the content on Twitter as Kids Write Jokes, and it turns out that tens of thousands of people agree with me that the "jokes" are hilarious.

Why is it so popular? I think it's the fact that every time you read one of these jokes , you picture a young child writing it, convinced and excited that they have something hilarious and amazing to share. The childhood innocence of silly nonsense is universally enjoyable. Sometimes the kids forget that jokes need a punchline. Sometimes they randomly leave out a key point that would have made the whole thing work. And sometimes they forget that a joke needs to be, well, a joke. But to the kid writing it, it makes perfect sense, and that's what's so funny about them and why I love these jokes so much.

It's also why I've left each one untouched and uneditedhere for the first time in this book in their original form! I hope you have as much fun reading these as I did compiling them. I still laugh out loud as I read through these pages. @KidsWriteJokes

why was the naked man naked. a. he had nakedpower. he had a naked pecan friend. c. he was naked man ( james, 8) A duck walks into a bar. he was naked man ( james, 8) A duck walks into a bar.

A man runs out because its unnatural to have a duck in a bar. why the man was naked a. he was naked guy b. he had a buttcheek c. buttoast ( james, 8) Why do fish have hands? because they don't have hands Im going to get to the BOTTEM of this. HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA.

Doctor Doctor I feel like im a curtain Shut Up (Arlo)

a man found a raisin in the woods. "what a funny looking raisin." "im not a raisin im just an ant with no legs." What did the goat say to the dog nice buttock you loser KNOCK KNOCK! WHOS THERE. REX THE DUMPLING EGG doctor doctor i fell over get back up then cheese face what is furry and lays eggs and also flys? a hot air chicken egg doctor: u look look like the walking dead man: i just have a cold doctor: oh yeh, im not a doctor, im a builder guess what the chicken was wearing monkey pants docter docter i have worms in my garden i dont care cant you see im busy you are doing youre nails. (seth, 8) What does your mom need to make her fase very dirtey SHE needs to go in the trashcan 474844747474747474474747474 times how meny kicks dus it take to brake a bed 1000 why did the man scream his pet chiken pooped on his computer (holly) how do you lose four pounds cut your hed off how do you say hello in alien? hfsrewruhthrtd I have a butt Sir we all have butts knock knock toilet to the rescue what do you call a donkey with a millon eyes and a millon legs. a monster (rose, 7) what is crazy and funny a monkey on a windmill (melissa) why did the frog cross the rode? to get a new tong why? because it's tong was stuck to a velkro tree how? the tree was coverd in syrip what flavor? mint How do you make a potato? you make it inside your brain LETS SEE WHAT DO WE HAVE HERE A POOP Why does moms get so angry because when she sends you to your rhoom she can read a fashion book If a wookie get shot and it suvives is it a lucky wookie Knock, knock who's there? Fancy Fancy who? Fancy lady, bye I have to go and shop i need more hats there was two fish in a tank and one of the fish said do you know how to drive this thing BECAUSE THE FISH ARE DRIVEING THE TANK IN A WAR what did the floor say to the chair get off me u fat idiot if you want to catch a bear in the winter you cut a hole in the ice then put peas around it then when he comes to eat them kick him in the ice hole Q. well stop looking at spoons (Harriet!) what do you call a pig with ears? dum head wat do you coll a spider with no legs. a hairy piece of trash!!!!!!!!!!!! Once aponer time The end HAHAHAHAHAHAHAH it was a dark and creepy night there was a black and white figure in the forest it was a cow