H.G. Tudor - Red Flag: 50 Warning Signs of Narcissistic Seduction

Red Flag:

50 Warning Signs of Narcissistic Seduction

By

H G Tudor

All Rights Reserved

Copyright 2016

Red Flag: 50 Warning Signs of Narcissistic Seduction

By

H G Tudor

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording, or otherwise, without the express written permission of the publisher.

Published by Insight Books

Introduction

The narcissist arrives like a whirlwind and as he or she embarks on the carefully managed campaign of seduction the target of the narcissists attention stands little chance to evade the tendrils as they wrap around him or her. Next to nobody realises that they have wandered into the sights of the narcissist and that is how we intend it to be. Not only do we appear like an angel, everything that we do is wonderful and pleasant. Who, in their right mind, would reject such marvellous and affectionate overtures? Many of a narcissists targets have suffered previously. The narcissist can sniff out those that have suffered some damage or abuse, be it from a previous lover, a friend or family. The narcissist uses this damage to his or her advantage when the narcissist begins the seduction. Few know, truly, what a narcissist is and even fewer recognise one in the flesh, even those who have been ensnared by one previously can and will be caught again.

This camouflaged approach of the narcissist is why we are so successful in seducing our targets. This along with the preparation that is undertaken when we identify a suitable target means that the target stands little chance to recognise what we are and to then take evasive action. If more people became skilled at identifying a narcissist at the seduction stage, then more people would avoid the abuse that occurs during devaluation and the emotional confusion and trauma that arises from the discard. The simple fact is that our kind are everywhere. We inhabit nearly every walk of life, come in all colours, sizes and shapes and it is no exaggeration that everyone will encounter a narcissist at some point in their lives. Most will not know it, many will not suffer any downside from this interaction since they are not a target which the narcissist is interested in. It may be that the person, through accident and luck, does not remain within the narcissists sphere of influence for long, perhaps moving away, changing jobs or not frequenting the place that the narcissist does for any longer. Notwithstanding these near misses, there are many, many people who are dragged into our nightmare world and suffer the horrendous consequences that follow such as emotional trauma, financial ruin, heartache, ill-health, sexual disease, ruined job prospects, damaged familial relationships and more besides. The cost to those who get sucked into the tornado that is the narcissist is substantial and more people ought to be warned and understand how to spot the narcissist.

The astonishing thing is that most victims, when applying the clear and sharp vision afforded by the spectacles of retrospection see that there were warning signs and many of them. Some they just did not see at the time when they were being seduced and they only became aware of them many years later, often with the assistance of someone else, when they looked back at their relationship with a narcissist. In some instances, the victim recalls that at the time something did not seem quite right but they ignored it, persuaded themselves it was nothing to be concerned about or the ever persuasive narcissist convinced them not to pay any heed to whatever it was that was troubling them. When this happens the victim has encountered a red flag. Its vibrant colour and the noise of it fluttering in the wind ought to alert the victim that he or she is in danger, but so often these red flags are ignored. The shiny and sparkling world which the narcissist creates obscures the flags so they are never seen. The sugar-coated words being poured into the victims ear by the narcissist cause the victim to fail to hear the flutter of the flag. There are always red flags when a victim is targeted and seduced by a narcissist but they are very rarely heeded.

I am a narcissist and I know the red flags that we exhibit when we are engaging with a victim. Whether it is someone we wish to have a relationship with and make the primary source of our fuel or whether we want you as a member of our coterie, occasionally providing us with fuel and forming a loyal hanger-on who backs us up and maintains the all-important faade, the red flags will be on display. Not every one of the following red flags will be exhibited in every interaction with the narcissist, some turn on the type of narcissist that has targeted you (see more in Sitting Target about the type of narcissists that exist). It is the case however that a number of these red flags will always be present, some are glaring, others subtler, but they are there nonetheless. Given who I am, I am best placed to provide you with the insight and knowledge about what these red flags are and why they are used. You will know some of them, others will be new to you but why they are used will provide you with additional knowledge you never had. The key to understanding the narcissist is to read about him or her. This understanding will then provide you with freedom. The freedom to make informed decisions about how you will deal with the narcissist and to protect yourself and those who you love and care about. It is information that is contained within this book that should be provided to everyone who is embarking on their adult lives. Whether it is just daily interaction with people and especially if it is from the perspective of embarking on a romantic and intimate relationship with someone, this book and its information will provide huge assistance to people so that they have a fighting chance of recognising the predatory narcissist and then be able to take evasive action. Everyone should read its contents so they are armed with knowledge because they will meet a narcissist at some point and they need to know the signs that show they have done so.

Successful predators attack their prey with little warning. The narcissist is especially savage as he or she does provide some kind of warning which is inherent in the way they operate but the victim invariably ignores that warning. This makes the narcissist especially dangerous. Maximise your chances of not falling prey to the narcissist, either for the first time or ever again. Maximise the chances of those you love and care about avoiding the snaking tendrils of the narcissist. Read this book and familiarise yourself and others with the fifty red flags that tell you that you are in the throes of being seduced by one of us; a narcissist.

Claims of a Spiritual Connection

The narcissist wants you to feel special. He or she wants you to feel like you are the centre of the universe, that you are the king of all you survey and that everything revolves around you. You are thrust high on to a pedestal and made to feel special and wonderful. One way of doing this is to make your relationship with the narcissist appear as if it has been decreed by the gods in heaven. You should be aware of phrases uttered by the narcissist such as: -

We have a spiritual connection.

I have been sent from heaven to look after you.

I am angel sent to guard you.

Someone above saw me and you and decided that we belonged together.

You are my soulmate.

I sense something deep between us, like some invisible bond.

I am a spiritual person and I sense the deep connection that we have.

If the narcissist is aware from his background checks on you that you are someone who believes in spirituality, astrology, ghosts and similar phenomena then he or she will use this technique all the more and this red flag will become larger. The background checks are always undertaken by our kind when we are focussing on a target. We ask friends about you, send our loyal Lieutenants to find out information about you, scour your social media profile and so on in order to find out as much information about you as we can in order to aid our seduction of you. You should keep this in mind when considering the red flags described in this book as many of them are predicated on knowing information about you before we approach you. You can read more about exactly how we carry out our preparatory work when we go after a fresh victim in Sitting Target: How and Why the Narcissist Chooses You .