Claire Mysko - Girls Inc. Presents Youre Amazing!: A No-Pressure Gude to Being Your Best Self

girls inc.

Inspiring all girls to be strong, smart, and boldSM

Youre
Amazing!

A No-Pressure
Guide to Being
Your Best Self

Claire Mysko

Copyright 2008 by Girls Incorporated

All rights reserved.
This book, or parts thereof, may not be reproduced in any form without permission from the publisher; exceptions are made for brief excerpts used in published reviews.

Published by Adams Media, an F+W Publications Company
57 Littlefield Street
Avon, MA 02322
www.adamsmedia.com

ISBN-13: 978-1-59869-713-1
ISBN-10: 1-59868-713-7
eISBN-978-1-44051-568-2

Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data
is available from the publisher.

Printed in Canada.

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Contents

Acknowledgments

I have been so fortunate to bring this book to life with Girls Inc., an organization that has been near and dear to my heart for many years. Thank you to everyone at Girls Inc. who works daily to inspire girls to be strong, smart, and bold.

I am especially grateful to Joyce M. Roch, Marcia Brumit Kropf, Alexander Kopelman, Brenda Stegall, and Heather Johnston Nicholson for believing in this project and providing their insight, expertise, and guidance from start to finish. I am also thankful to Susan Houchin, who connected me with so many wonderful Girls Inc. affiliates. And I must give a special shout out to my favorite Communications ladies. Allison Keiley, Cheryl Messer, and Sarah Branley answered countless emails and phone calls, coordinated details, and generally hooked me up with whatever I needed for this book. They also made the research and writing process a lot more fun.

Many Girls Inc. executive directors and program facilitators took the time to speak with me about the issues girls deal with in their communities. I would particularly like to thank Asa Olsson, Devorah Elizalde, Roberta Wilhelm, Cathy Duffy, Brenda Tracey, Yvette Nechvatal-Drew, Karen Kenney, and Dorothy Hyatt for sharing their wisdom.

I appreciate the valuable input I received from Doug Bunnell and Cynthia Bulik on sections of the manuscript. A special thanks goes to JoAnna and Sara Shore for their thorough reading of the book (and for their encouraging words!).

I am grateful to my agent Jacqueline Hackett for putting this project in motion and to my editor Meredith OHayre for steering it through to completion.

My friend Magali gave me many soul-energizing pep talks. Her daughter, Chloe, constantly reminded me of why I wanted to write this book. I hope she will enjoy reading it in a few years.

My creative and talented family has always supported the writer in meback to the days when I was the eight-year-old editor-in-chief of Fun Magazine (circulation: 5). I thank my mother Madeleine, my father William, my brothers Joseph and Luke, and my sister Martha for their love.

I am blessed to be married to the kindest, smartest, and most patient guy in the universe. Lucky me! Thanks (for all eternity) to Josh Brown.

Finally, this book would not have been possible without the voices of all the girls and women who shared their stories with me. I thank them, and I know they will inspire something amazing in each and every girl who reads their words.

Introduction

The Girls Inc. Girls Bill of RightsSM

Girls have the right to be themselves and to resist gender stereotypes.

Girls have the right to express themselves with originality and enthusiasm.

Girls have the right to take risks, to strive freely, and to take pride in success.

Girls have the right to accept and appreciate their bodies.

Girls have the right to have confidence in themselves and to be safe in the world.

Girls have the right to prepare for interesting work and economic independence.

Think of an amazing girl you know. Is she a straight-A student, a stellar athlete, a stylish trendsetter? Or maybe you think shes amazing because shes a thoughtful friend or a total goof ball who always knows how to make you laugh. The truth is that every girl is amazing in her own unique wayand that includes you!

At Girls Inc., our mission is to inspire all girls to be strong, smart, and bold. Actually, we think girls are already strong, smart, and bold. Its not always easy to stay that way, though. Has anyone ever told you, Just be yourself: You can do anything you set your mind to? Great idea, right? But for many girls, its not long before that other voice creeps in and starts saying things like, I feel like I have to do everything. How can I be myself when there are so many different messages about what I should look like and act like? Talk about pressure! If this sounds familiar, take a deep breath and keep reading. The good news is that you are definitely not alone.

For a report called The Supergirl Dilemma, we asked more than 1,000 girls to tell us all about the pressures they live through every day. Whats a supergirl, exactly? Well, real-life supergirls might not be leaping tall buildings in a single bound or flying through the air like a bird or a plane, but they are trying to do pretty much everything elsefrom getting good grades and having the right look to fitting in at school and dealing with family and friends. Many girls we talked to said they are constantly struggling to be perfect and please everyone. With all those expectations to live up to, more than half of the middle school girls we surveyed told us they often feel stressed; one-third of girls in our study said that they often feel sad and unhappy. Can you relate? Theres no denying that supergirls are smart, talented, and ready for success. Unfortunately, they wont have much luck taking on the world if they are too stressed out or bummed out to use their super powers!

Thats why we want every girl who picks up this book to give up the quest to be super and start celebrating what makes her