Henry Cloud - Boundaries: When to Say Yes, How to Say No to Take Control of Your Life

Ive been recommending Boundaries to friends, team members and radio listeners for more than twenty years. In fact, hardly a day goes by when I dont use something that I learned from this book. The principles are timeless, and the updates in this version make Boundaries even more relevant to readers and their relationships.

DAVE RAMSEY, BESTSELLING AUTHOR AND NATIONALLY SYNDICATED RADIO SHOW HOST

Now updated and expanded, this classic book is more timely and relevant than ever for todays always on, always there culture. If technology and social media are intruding on your life and relationships, learn from the boundaries experts how to protect yourself and the people you love. This life-changing book is still the go-to guide for healthy relationships, personal growth, and true freedom in Christ.

ANDY STANLEY, PASTOR, AUTHOR, COMMUNICATOR, AND FOUNDER OF NORTH POINT MINISTRIES

Of every book that Ive read, Boundaries is the one I recommend most often. All of us can overcommit, become doormats, or find ourselves in codependent and dysfunctional relationships. Dr. Henry Cloud and Dr. John Townsends one-of-a-kind book helps guide the reader through a change in mindset that eventually leads to a change in actions. If you know you have some unhealthy patterns in friendships, at work, in your schedule, with technology or your family, this book will help you establish the boundaries you need to create the life you are supposed to live.

CRAIG GROESCHEL, PASTOR OF LIFE. CHURCH AND NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLING AUTHOR

Dr. Henry Cloud and Dr. John Townsend continue to break the boundaries of incredible revelation in their new and revised edition of Boundaries. As the senior pastor of a large church, this message has not only changed my life, but the lives of my staff and congregation. If you want to learn how to have healthier relationships, you need to read this book!

ROBERT MORRIS, FOUNDING SENIOR PASTOR, GATEWAY CHURCH, DALLAS/FORT WORTH, TEXAS; BESTSELLING AUTHOR OF THE BLESSED LIFE, THE GOD I NEVER KNEW, TRULY FREE, AND FREQUENCY

Also by Dr. Henry Cloud and Dr. John Townsend

Boundaries

Boundaries Workbook

Boundaries audio

Boundaries video curriculum

Boundaries in Dating

Boundaries in Dating Workbook

Boundaries in Dating audio

Boundaries in Dating curriculum

Boundaries in Marriage

Boundaries in Marriage Workbook

Boundaries in Marriage audio

Boundaries in Marriage curriculum

Boundaries with Kids

Boundaries with Kids Workbook

Boundaries with Kids audio

Boundaries with Kids curriculum

How to Have That Difficult Conversation

How People Grow

How People Grow Workbook

How People Grow audio

Making Small Groups Work

Making Small Groups Work audio

Our Mothers, Ourselves

Raising Great Kids

Raising Great Kids for Parents of Preschoolers curriculum

Raising Great Kids Workbook for Parents of Preschoolers

Raising Great Kids Workbook for Parents of School-Age Children

Raising Great Kids Workbook for Parents of Teenagers

Raising Great Kids Audio PagesSafe People

Safe People Workbook

12 Christian Beliefs That Can Drive You Crazy

Resources by Dr. John Townsend

Hiding from Love

Boundaries with Teens

The Entitlement Cure

Beyond Boundaries

Resources by Dr. Henry Cloud

Changes That Heal

Changes That Heal Workbook

Changes That Heal audio

ZONDERVAN

Boundaries

Copyright 1992, 2017 by Dr. Henry Cloud and Dr. John Townsend

Requests for information should be addressed to:
Zondervan, 3900 Sparks Dr. SE, Grand Rapids, Michigan 49546

Zondervan titles may be purchased in bulk for educational, business, fundraising, or sales promotional use. For information, please email Special Markets@Zondervan.com.

Epub Edition August 2017 ISBN 9780310350811

ISBN 978-0-310-35023-1 (hardcover)

ISBN 978-0-310-35180-1 (softcover)

ISBN 978-0-310-35109-2 (audio)

ISBN 978-0-310-35081-1 (ebook)

All Scripture quotations, unless otherwise indicated, are taken from the Holy Bible, New International Version, NIV. Copyright 1973, 1978, 1984, 2011 by Biblica, Inc. Used by permission of Zondervan. All rights reserved worldwide. www.Zondervan.com. The NIV and New International Version are trademarks registered in the United States Patent and Trademark Office by Biblica, Inc.

Scripture quotations marked KJV are taken from the King James Version. Public domain.

Scripture quotations marked NASB are taken from the New American Standard Bible. Copyright 1960, 1962, 1963, 1968, 1971, 1972, 1973, 1975, 1977, 1995 by The Lockman Foundation. Used by permission. (www.Lockman.org).

Scripture quotations marked NLT are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation. 1996, 2004, 2015 by Tyndale House Foundation. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Carol Stream, Illinois 60188. All rights reserved.

Scripture quotations marked NRSV are taken from the New Revised Standard Version Bible. Copyright 1989, Division of Christian Education of the National Council of the Churches of Christ in the United States of America. Used by permission. All rights reserved.

Any internet addresses (websites, blogs, etc.) and telephone numbers in this book are offered as a resource. They are not intended in any way to be or imply an endorsement by Zondervan, nor does Zondervan vouch for the content of these sites and numbers for the life of this book.

No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any meanselectronic, mechanical, photocopy, recording, or any otherexcept for brief quotations in printed reviews, without the prior permission of the publisher.

Since the case studies in this book are composites from Dr. Henry Clouds and Dr. John Townsends practices, we have not attempted to identify which author is counseling which client in all cases. All names and circumstances, however, have been fictionalized to protect privacy.

Published in association with Yates & Yates, www.yates2.com.

Interior design: Beth Shagene

Printed in the United States of America

To Henry and Louise Cloud
and
John and Rebecca Townsend,

whose training in boundaries
made a difference in our lives

Contents

For the 1992 Edition

Scott Bolinder and Bruce Ryskamp caught the vision for this book from the very beginning. They arranged for a retreat on Lake Michigan, where we passed this vision on to other Zondervan staff members.

Sandy Vander Zicht directed the editorial process and, with Lori Walburg, fine-tuned the manuscript into a book that is more graceful, more precise, and easier to read and understand. Dan Runyon cut the book down to a manageable size.

Dave Anderson translated this book into a video curriculum.

Sealy Yates encouraged and supported us throughout the whole process, from contract to finished book.

For the 2017 Edition