Dominic Mann - Flirt Like a Pro: How to Be an Irresistible Flirt, Create Intense Sexual Tension, and Make Women Go Weak at the Knees (Dating Advice for Men: How to Flirt and Attract Women)

By Dominic Mann

Flirting is essential to getting the girl.

If you cant flirt or dont flirt, shell see you as a just friends guy. There will zero sexual tension and zero attractionnot what you want.

Flirting is the difference between friendly conversation and sexy conversation. The difference between her seeing you as friend zone material and her going weak at the knees for you.

The power of flirting is aptly summed up in a quote from the television series Mad Men :

You gotta let them know what kind of guy you are, then theyll know what kind of girl to be

In other words, are you a friendly nice guy or a sexual man? Are you friend zone material or lover material?

Now, if youre reading this book, youre probably a rather clumsy flirt. Or maybe you dont know how to flirt at all.

But thats okay, because despite seeming like an impossible concept to grasp (I mean, you just flirt . Right? What the heck does that even mean? What are you supposed to do?), flirting is actually quite simple. Once you get the surprisingly simple core techniques down pat, flirting is not only easy, but fun .

So, without further ado, lets dive right in and turn you into an irresistible flirt.

What is flirting?

A good place to find an answer to this question would be the dictionary.

flirt

verb

1. behave as though sexually attracted to someone, but playfully rather than with serious intentions.

"she began to tease him, flirting with other men in front of him"

From this definition, there is one word that is particularly important.

Want to guess?

Here it is: Playfully .

Flirting is playful. Its lighthearted and fun, not serious and sombre. Its playful and subtle, not direct and blunt.

In a moment, well take a look at the most common mistakes men make when flirting. For now, lets explore the purpose of flirting.

Why flirt?

To answer this question, lets take a look at an example of a conversation where there is zero flirtation.

Guy: Where are you from?

Girl: Melbourne!

Guy: Australia? Wow. So you managed to survive all the deadly animals?

Girl: Yeah. *laughs*

Guy: Nah, seriously though, Ive heard its one of the worlds most livable cities or something. Whyd you move?

Girl: Yeah, its a pretty great place to live. I moved because

Blah, blah, blah. And the conversation continues.

Notice the problem?

In case you didnt, heres the answer: The conversation is entirely platonic. There are no sexual undertones whatsoever. For all we know, it could be two guys talking.

To put it bluntly, the guy in the example conversation is going to be going home alone.

At best, he goes home alone, at worst, he gets stuck in her friend zone. (Note: The friend zone is worse because its a total waste of time and leads nowhere.)

And so there you have it, the answer to why flirting is an essential component of seduction. It gets her imagining the two of you together romantically and makes it clear in her mind that youre a sexual man, not a just friends kind of guy.

Okay, so if flirting is essential to getting women to see you as a man to have sex with, and not a friend, then why are most guys terrible at flirting?

Lets take a look at the most common mistakes made by almost all men.

The guys who avoid the mistake of not flirting at all (and thus ending up as just friends), almost always end up making one of the following mistakes.

Fortunately for you, this means that as you develop your flirting skills, youll have an added advantage when it comes to seducing the ladies.

Anyway, here are the most common mistakes guys make when flirting

When it comes to flirting, many guys are just way too obvious.

Why is this a problem?

It sucks the mystery out of the interaction. And along with that mystery goes excitement. Intrigue is fun, but being obvious kills it.

Heres an example of clumsy, obvious flirting:

Girl: I love sports bras.

Guy: I bet youd look amazing in a sports bra.

Ugh. Too obvious.

So what should flirting look like instead?

Well, as youll discover in the next chapter, great flirting is far more subtle. Its done through implication rather than stating things outright. It leaves more mystery and intriguemore for women to guess about.

Being overly direct also kills the excitement of intrigue.

For example, this is why it is generally unwise to compliment women based on their physical looks. (E.g. You have gorgeous eyes, or, Wow, arent you a stunner? or, Are you a model?)

Aside from making it seem as though youve never been with an attractive woman before (an unattractive trait in and of itself), you kill any mystery there might have been about your intentions.

On top of that, being too direct sexually, (e.g. Im going to fuck you so hard later) eliminates a womans ability to absolve herself of feelings of slutiness by reasoning that sex just happened. Women have been socialized to feel shame and fear about being perceived (by either herself, her friends, or even just society at large) as slutty or sexually promiscuous. So when youre too direct with a woman youve only recently met and make it clear youre going to bang her, most women bring up some excuse or just disappear. You can think of this as their anti-slut defense.

What you need to do instead is give her a way to rationalize sex as something that just happenedplausible deniability. For example, Ive got this awesome pool table at my place, well go play a round. While you and her both know whats going to happen (hint: it starts with an f and ends with a k), this example gives her a way to rationalize it away. She can tell herself that shes just going back to your place to have some fun and see what happens rather than that shes going to your place to have sex with you, which would leave her feeling dirty and slutty.

Anyway, so whats the lesson?

Dont be so direct!

If you have a group of male friends, you guys probably banter a lot. However, unless youre gay, (which youre probably not if youre reading this book) the banter isnt going to have any sexual undertones.

Unfortunately for many guys, they use this same kind of non-sexual banter when attempting to flirt.

For an example of the difference between friendly and sexual (nonverbal) flirting, consider the difference between giving a girl a high five versus holding hands. One is non-sexual, the other unmistakably sexual.

Unfortunately, most guys take the less risky route rather than making a bold, risky move. This leaves interactions they have with girls with no sort of sexual undertone.

Moving on, heres how to avoid these mistakes and become an irresistible flirt

The number one key to flirting is

Earlier, we talked about a mistake that most guys make when flirting: Being too obvious.

The solution?

Be subtle.

And how does one be subtle?

Simple. Take your blunt, clumsy, overly direct attempt at flirting and make it indirect . Remember this clumsy, overly direct example from earlier?