A WOMANS Q&A GUIDE
TO HOTTER, NAUGHTIER, MORE
ADVENTUROUS SEX
Shanna Katz, M.ED, ACS
Copyright text 2014 Shanna Katz. Copyright concept and design 2014 Ulysses Press and its licensors. All Rights Reserved. Any unauthorized duplication in whole or in part or dissemination of this edition by any means (including but not limited to photocopying, electronic devices, digital versions, and the Internet) will be prosecuted to the fullest extent of the law.
Published by: | Amorata Press |
an imprint of Ulysses Press |
P.O. Box 3440 |
Berkeley, CA 94703 |
www.amoratapress.com |
ISBN: 978-1-61243-309-7
Library of Congress Control Number 2013914553
10 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1
Acquisitions editor: Keith Riegert
Project editor: Katherine Furman
Managing editor: Claire Chun
Front cover design: Chalkley Calderwood
Cover photo: Nejron Photo/shutterstock.com
Interior design and layout: Wade Nights
Indexer: Jay Kreider, J S Editorial
Distributed by Publishers Group West
NOTE TO READERS: This book has been written and published strictly for informational purposes, and in no way should it be used as a substitute for consultation with professional therapists. All facts in this book came from scientific publications, personal interviews, published trade books, self-published materials by experts, magazine articles, and the personal-practice experiences of the authorities quoted or sources cited. The author and publisher are providing you with information in this work so that you can have the knowledge and can choose, at your own risk, to act on that knowledge.
This book is independently authored and published and no sponsorship or endorsement of this book by, and no affiliation with, any trademarked brands or other products mentioned within is claimed or suggested. All trademarks that appear in this book belong to their respective owners and are used here for informational purposes only.
Contents
Hello.
There are countless ways that Your Pleasure Map could have ended up in your hands. Perhaps youre a self-assured and sassy woman, and the idea of getting to choose your own sexual adventures appealed to you. Perhaps youre more of a sexual newbie looking for some tips and techniques to help bring out your inner bedroom goddess. Whatever it was that made you pick up this book, rest assured that its for you, because youre the one who decides how to make it work for you. You can use this book any way you want. Each chapter poses several scenarios and then gives you pick your passion options for different outcomes. Your Pleasure Map is designed so you can pick whatever turns you on the most and read all about it. Youll discover creative yet practical ways to go on new adventures tailor-made to your desires. With all the options explored between these covers, youre bound to find turn-ons that you never imagined before or that you just never really considered. Youll also get the scoop on how to make these fantasies part of your reality.
Even though this book is a map to lead you to new frontiers, you dont have to pick just one passion in each scenario. You may want to read this book from beginning to end, chapter after chapter, and glean from it everything you can. You may decide to read only those sections that interest you. You may find yourself reading the adventurous options aloud to your partner (or partners) and have fun and interesting conversations about how you each answered.
Why write a book for women on how to be sexually empowered? Why should there be something written specifically for women to examine their own sexuality, look at their body image, learn about anatomy, and give them ways to consider what makes them feel sexually confident?
Because of the way our society views sex, sexuality, and especially women, there arent a lot of opportunities for women to get real information. While there are a plethora of periodical publications that you can pick up at the checkout stand of the grocery store or access online, they tend to simply state and restate the same few tips that focus almost solely on the mans pleasure (and they tend to be very heterocentric). If youre lucky, you might get some form of comprehensive sex education in middle school or high school. But following graduation, youre left to figure the rest out for yourself. Even many of the best comprehensive sexuality education programs dont include any information on pleasure and communication, and frequently dont even have the clitoris on the vaginal/vulvar anatomy pictures. The clitoris is a body part designed for nothing more than the sole purpose of providing pleasure (which is a pretty amazing feat in and of itself), and we as a society pretend it just flat out doesnt exist. Then, once you turn eighteen, or you graduate high school, magically youre now allowed to become a sexual being and are supposed to have exciting, fulfilling, and engaging sexual experiences, as well as authentic, communicative relationships. Its a wonderful concept and a fabulous thing to aim for, but how can we all hope to attain these goals when weve been given no education, no guidance, and no direction on how to make these sexually satisfying and emotionally fulfilling interactions happen?
I believe that making education about sexuality and relationships for all adults accessible is so important that I decided to become a board-certified sexologist and sex educator who works specifically with adults. This book came out of the idea that sexually empowering women to have the sex lives that they want is a radical idea that can support women of all relationship statuses, orientations, ages, economic statuses, ability levels, ethnic backgrounds, races, and more.
While every adult has the right to inclusive and accessible sex education, our society is determined to undermine womens sexuality. Theres the Madonna/Whore complex: if you dont know enough about sex, youre mocked as being innocent and naive, but if you have information about sex and are willing to share it, discuss it, and use it, youre viewed as slutty, skanky, and easy.
Both of these options are unacceptable to me. Everyone should have a smorgasbord of information available to them about sexuality, and they can choose in each situation or scenario which bits and pieces they want to use. There shouldnt be any stigma about choosing not to be sexually active, just as there shouldnt be any stigma about possessing information on sexuality and choosing to explore and celebrate your sexuality. These binaries and stereotypes are used for nothing more than to control women and their bodies, and it needs to stop.
So read this book. Read it as part of a book club. Read it on the train (no, dont cover up the title). Read it while youre waiting for your kids to get out of practice. Read it at the gym. Read it on the plane. Read it in front of your partner. You should have the right to gain sexual confidence anywhere, anytime. We shouldnt be ashamed of wanting information about sex, sexuality, relationships, bodies, communication, and more. Everyone wants this info heck, look how popular Fifty Shades of Grey
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