By Dr Carrie W. Reynolds
Copyright 2013 by Dr Carrie W. Reynolds
All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced or utilized in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording or by any information storage and retrieval system, without permission in writing from the author.
TABLE OF CONTENTS
In order to have an excellent ejaculatory control, you need to be able to overcome premature ejaculation. Premature ejaculation simply means that a man lacks adequate voluntary control and climaxes involuntarily before he wishes to do so.
Premature ejaculation (also known as early ejaculation) occurs when a man ejaculates sooner during coitus (or sexual intercourse) than he or his partner would like. This condition is found in most men. If it occurs infrequently, then it is not a cause for concern. However, if he often ejaculates before the commencement of intercourse or afterwards, then it may be considered premature ejaculation.
Premature ejaculation is characterized by a lack of voluntary control over ejaculation. It is so sever among men that it affects 1 out of 3 men. This condition may be caused by both psychological and biological factors. Although its a source of embarrassment to most men, it is however common and can be treated.
Men with premature ejaculation often complain of not being able to have total control of ejaculation. Others even say they wish they could last longer.
Most people however paint premature ejaculation as a disease or an illness. On the contrary, it is a normal state. This condition only remains in a mans life due to a lack of bodily knowledge, skills and experience.
The best way to increase the time you last during intercourse is to treat your sexual performance as something that can be developed and improved through the use of correct techniques and training.
Causes
The exact cause of premature ejaculation is not known, but it is a combination of factors. It was once thought to be due to psychological problems only. It is however now known to involve a complex interaction of both psychological and biological factors.
Psychological Factors
Psychological factors that emanate from early sexual experiences may bring about a pattern that may be difficult to change later in life. The factors include:
i) Situations in which one hurried to reach climax so as not to be discovered.
ii) Guilty feelings which accelerate ones tendency to rush through sexual encounters.
iii) Anxiety about sexual performance or other issues often leads to premature ejaculation.
iv) Being anxious about obtaining or maintaining erection during sexual intercourse may form a pattern of rushing to ejaculate and this may be difficult to change later in life.
v) Lack of trust, hurt feelings and communication gap in ones relationship.
Note: If youve had infrequent premature ejaculation in your previous relationship(s), then its possible your current premature ejaculation problem is from your present relationship.
Biological Factors
The biological factors that contribute to premature ejaculation are:
i) Abnormal levels of brain chemicals (also known as neurotransmitters).
ii) Abnormal hormone levels.
iii) Inherited traits.
iv) Abnormal reflex activity of the ejaculatory system.
v) Thyroid problems.
Note: Nervous system damage as a result of surgery or trauma including withdrawal from certain medications employed in treating mental health problems rarely cause premature ejaculation.
Now lets get one thing straight. Theres a difference between orgasm and ejaculation.
The sensation that comes with ejaculation is the orgasm. It ranges from a simple sense of release to the most pleasurable of human experiences.
It is possible to ej aculate without an orgasm. It is also possible to have an orgasm without ejaculating. So, to have an excellent ejaculatory control, you need to learn how to experience the sensations of orgasm without ejaculating.
Ejaculation is produced by spasms of muscles at the base of the penis. This ejects semen out of the tip of the penis and this semen contains about 300 million sperm cells.
In the following chapters, well take a look at the techniques and tips which if implemented will enable you to please your partner by lasting 10, 20, and 30 minutes longer in bed. We will achieve this by looking at safe, natural, easy and voluntary ways to correct premature ejaculation. Im sorry if you feel disappointed because you may be expecting me (being a doctor) to write about the surgeries and medications to treat premature ejaculation.
How To Get The Best From This Book
I want to commend you for reading this chapter. It tells a lot about you. It says youre tired of less than the best in your sexual relationship with your partner. The fact that you are reading this book suggests that you want to move upward faster with fewer mistakes.
Those are great goals and very few people attain them. Now, for you to gain the best from this book, follow these four suggestions:
1. Read the entire book as quickly as you can. This will give you a rough idea of what gaining an ejaculatory control entails. It will serve as an orientation session for achieving fulfilment and happiness in your sexual relationship. Immediately, as you read through, you will see what differentiates those struggling with their sexual issues from those that are able to wow their sexual partners.
2. Next, spend a week slowly and carefully rereading each chapter. Make notes . Underline those concepts that have meaningful application to you.
3. Discuss what you learnt with your partner since shes the reason you get this book in the first place- to please her in the bedroom.
4. Finally, and very importantly, put the guidelines into application. See for yourself how they do work wonders in boosting your ejaculatory threshold. Practise the guidelines until they become habits.
TALK WITH YOUR PARTNER
I put this as the first method to use in combatting premature ejaculation (in order to gain good control over ejaculation) because it is the most important. Without a concrete understanding between you and your partner, the other methods that will be discussed in this book will bear no fruit.
Premature ejaculation affects not only the man but also his partner and his sexual relationship. It brings about a quick end to the intimacy the man shares with his partner. This thus brings about anger, shame, and frustration and can make the man to turn away from his partner. Also, the mans partner may be upset with his emotional change or the outcome of the sexual encounter.
Although premature ejaculation is a male problem, it requires teamwork for it to be corrected. The man needs to admit his problem while the female partner must be patient and understanding. Unsupportive reactions from the female partner will only increase the mans feeling of inadequacy thereby complicating the situation.
Thus, you need to talk with your partner. In other words, there should be an open channel of communication between you and your partner.
Unless you and your partner are very understanding and mature, this condition can have a destructive impact on your sex life and may eventually threaten your entire relationship.
Communication is highly essential. Speak openly with your partner to avoid misunderstanding and miscommunication.
The first thing I want you to realise is that you are not the only one suffering from the pains inflicted by premature ejaculation, your partner also suffers from it. I believe you dont expect her to be happy after a messy and less-satisfying sex. Thus, there is a need for you to discuss your problem with her.
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