Sky Pony Press - Belly Laugh Brilliant Jokes for Smart Kids: 350 Genius Jokes!

Copyright 2020 by Skyhorse Publishing All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced in any manner without the express written consent of the publisher, except in the case of brief excerpts in critical reviews or articles. All inquiries should be addressed to Sky Pony Press, 307 West 36th Street, 11th Floor, New York, NY 10018. Sky Pony Press books may be purchased in bulk at special discounts for sales promotion, corporate gifts, fund-raising, or educational purposes. Special editions can also be created to specifications. For details, contact the Special Sales Department, Sky Pony Press, 307 West 36th Street, 11th Floor, New York, NY 10018 or .

Sky Pony is a registered trademark of Skyhorse Publishing, Inc., a Delaware corporation. Visit our website at www.skyponypress.com. 10 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1 Manufactured in China, 2020 This product conforms to CPSIA 2008 Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data is available on file. ISBN: 978-1-5107-5490-4 EISBN: 978-1-5107-5492-8 Cover design by Daniel Brount Illustrations by Alex Paterson Printed in China Contents What did the wall say to the perpendicular wall? Meet you at the corner! Why cant you trust an atom? Because they make up everything! I love the way the Earth rotates. It really makes my day! Parallel lines have so much in common. Its a shame they will never meet! What belongs to you but is used by others? Your name! Whats the easiest way to double your money? Look at it in the mirror! Where was the Declaration of Independence signed? At the bottom! Why was the farm so noisy? Because the bulls have horns! What snack do computers like? Microchips! Archaeologist: Someone whose career lies in ruins! What did the pig say when the butcher caught it by the tail? Thats the end of me! What gives milk and has a horn? A milk truck! Did you hear about the butcher who backed into the meat grinder? He got a little behind in his work! What wears shoes but has no feet? The sidewalk! Why are soccer players good at math? Because they use their heads! A computer once beat me at chess.

Then I beat it at kickboxing! It never beat me at chess again. What demands an answer but doesnt ask any questions? A doorbell (or a telephone). Why do firemen wear red suspenders? To keep their pants up! What is the hardest subject? Geology, the study of rocks! How do you make golden soup? With fourteen carrots! What is bought by the yard and worn by the foot? A carpet! What pet is always found on the floor? A carpet! If April showers bring May flowers, what do Mayflowers bring? Pilgrims! I saw my math teacher with graph paper. She must be plotting something! What question must always be answered with yes? What does Y-E-S spell? The past, the present, and the future go to school. It was tense. How many of each animal did Moses take on the Ark? Moses didnt take any animals on the Ark, Noah did! Whats the tallest building in the world? The library because it has the most stories! What fish do pelicans eat? Any fish that fits the bill! One bird cant make a pun, but toucan! What do you call and empty parrot cage? A Polly-gone! What has eighteen legs and catches flies? A baseball team! If corn oil comes from corn, and olive oil from olives, where does baby oil come from? There are three kinds of people in the world.

Those who can count and those who cant! Whoever put the letter B in the word subtle was a genius! My English teacher asked me to say two pronouns. I said, Who? Me? Nine out of ten people are stupid. Im glad Im in the one percent!