ALSO COMPILED BY J.S. SALT How To B E T HE A LMOST P ERFECT W IFE
By Husbands Who KnowHow To B E T HE A LMOST P ERFECT Perfect Parent
By Teenagers Who Know
To all my contributors
Copyright 2000, 2014 J. S. Salt All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, or by any information storage and retrieval system, without permission in writing from the publisher. Published by
Shake It! Books
Tel: (805) 573-1069
www.shakethatbrain.com/books.html This book is available at special discounts for bulk purchase for military, non-profit and educational use.
Special books, or book excerpts, can also be created to fit specific needs. ISBN: 978-1-931657-13-6 One advantage of marriage
is that when you fall out of love with him
or he falls out of love with you,
it keeps you together
until you maybe fall in again.JUDITH VIORST Introduction If you could tell someone how to be the almost perfect husband, what would you tell them? Thats the question I posed to more than one thousand wives, ex-wives and widows, nearly all of whom freely offered advice. The result is a collection of outstanding insiders adviceso husbands can learn what their wives truly crave; and wives, at the very least, can point and say: See, thats what I need. Just like this wife says on page _____. Guaranteed. The book you now hold in your hands will serve as a catalyst for conversation, leading you and your spouse to better understandingand a better marriage.
Or give this insiders guide, and its companion volume, How to Be the Almost Perfect WifeBy Husbands Who Know, to a couple thats about to get married. These small but important books will surely improve any union or marriage. Theyve even improved my own marriage. (And it was pretty good before the books.) Communication Share your thoughts and fears, and let me do the same. L ESLIE , 51
married 30 years Always listen to what your wife has to say no matter how uninteresting or boring it is to youits important to her or she wouldnt be sharing it with you. B ARBARA , 36
married 12 years known hubby 25 years When Im having a bad day and complaining a lot, please just listen. Just tell me you love me and give me a hug. B ECKY , 33
married 12 years I know you want to help, but please dont jump in with a solution before Ive finished telling you my problem. Sometimes all I need is a sympathetic ear. L INDA , 40
married 15 years Call me during the day to let me know youre thinking about me. Sometimes all I need is a sympathetic ear. L INDA , 40
married 15 years Call me during the day to let me know youre thinking about me.
Its a little thingbut it means a lot. V ICTORIA , 30+ Its not enough to talk to me by sending me a text or two. During the day, I need to hear your voice now and then. J ESSICA , 27
married 2 years Ask her how shes feeling and listen with your heart (not just your head). M AGGIE , 42
2nd marriage of 12 years Always call home when youre going to be late. That way she wont worry about youor get angry with you. P HYLLIS , 42
married 21 years Think before you speak.
Words can damage and cut to the bone. J EANNIE , 55
married 22 years, separated 7 years For every negative statement, say at least a dozen positive things. Maybe its my fragile self-esteem, but what you think and say about me colors so much how I see myself. So please be selective in what you say. J EANETTA
married 2 years When you are upset with me or the kids, sit down with me and explain whats bothering you. Dont hide your emotions or pound out your frustrations in the garage.
Come and talk things out with meso I can understand your point of view. A NN , 65
divorced after 26 years When youre angry, tell your wife why. Dont say, If you dont know, Im not going to tell you. P AMELA , 53
2nd marriage of 6 years Please do not raise your voice in anger. C ATHIE , 47
married 25 years Youll never win me over through shouting or yelling. (Whisper sweet nothings, however, and Ill follow you anywhere.) S UE , 41
married 5 years Dont just say, Thats how I am. (Whisper sweet nothings, however, and Ill follow you anywhere.) S UE , 41
married 5 years Dont just say, Thats how I am.
You wouldnt accept it from the children and I wont accept it from you. K AREN , 46
3rd marriage of 6 years Before you blow upwell before! ask yourself just how important this issue will be two weeks from nowa montha year a lifetime. F RAN , 55
married 33 years PLEASE, PLEASE dont end an argument by telling me Im stupid, callous and dont understand anything, followed by Okay, lets go to bed. If you can, arrange the accidental touch when weve gone to bed angry. Making love is a great way to put the fight behind us. M AUREEN , 62
married 42 years Give up faultfinding and blame. F RAN , 43
divorced Apologize when youre wrong.
Forgive when youre not. J AN , 42
3rd marriage of 1 years We dont need to agree all the time. But when we dont agree, I need you to try to understand and respect my position. G AIL , 38
married 14 years Even if you dont think I should feel a certain way, at least try to understand why Im feeling that way. M ARY , 55
2nd marriage of 10 years When Im trying to talk with you I need you to stop what youre doing and look me in the eyeso I know youre really listening. MADDIE, 43
married 2 years Your eyes are on mine but your mind is elsewhere.
Please, oh, please, LISTEN when I talk. R UTH , 68
married 48 years It makes me lonely when you speak to me over your shoulder or from behind the newspaper. Really look at me, right into my eyes at least twice a day. It doesnt matter what the topic is: Its the connection that counts. S HIRLEY , 41
divorced Before marriage, a man declares that he would lay down his life to serve you; after marriage, he wont even lay down his newspaper to talk to you. HELEN ROWLAND Tell your wife constantly that she is the best thing that ever happened to you.
This will help to remind you as well. S ALLY , 55
married 3 years Love & Affection Instead of just telling me, show me you love me. A kiss when I least expect it. Flowers for no reason. Hold my hand when were in public, and in private. Little surpirises like these can sometimes mean much more than words.
J ENNIFER , 22
married 9 months Write me little notes and give me funny cards a little more often, like you did when we were courting. (Ive kept every letter and note you ever sent me.) J ENNIFER , 32
married 6 years Once in a while, send me a little surprise at workso the people around me are jealous that I have the perfect mate. M ARILEE , 46
married 22 years Surprise her with something small but important, like bringing home take-out without being asked. R OWENA , 46
married 23 years Its the day-to-day things he does that count: filling my water glass when its empty, giving me the best steak off the grill, getting up on a cold night to get me an aspirin and a glass of water. A NNA , 52
married 35 years ago at age 17 The little things you do for me mean much more to me than lavish presents on special occasions. L YNDA , 50
married 22 years When you go to bed before I do, turn down my side of the bed as well.
And dont forget to turn on the night light. It makes me feel taken care of. M ADDIE , 43
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