Linda Bozzo - Gross Body Jokes to Tickle Your Funny Bone

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What does a moose get if he lifts weights? Moosles!

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Make your friends giggle with silly and fun jokes! Check out all the body jokes, limericks, riddles, knock-knock jokes, and tongue twisters in this book! About the Author Linda Bozzo has written many articles and stories for children's magazines as well as several children's books. Linda loves to read and enjoys writing fi ction and nonfi ction for young people.

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Why did the computer go to the eye doctor? To improve its web sight!

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Why did the porch tell the steps to knock it off? They kept stair-ing.

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There was a young maid who said, Why
cant I look in my ear with my eye?
If I give my mind to it,
Im sure I can do it.
You never can tell till you try.

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What do witches like to give children for dessert? Eye scream!

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Eye Doctor: How many lines can you read on the chart? Patient: What chart?

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Why is it easy to fool a sheep? Because it is so easy to pull the wool over its eyes!

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Why did the teacher wear sunglasses in class? Because her students were so bright.

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How do you know carrots are good for your eyes? You never see a rabbit wearing glasses.

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What did one eye say to the other eye? Between you and me, something smells.

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Knock, Knock! Whos there? Iris.

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Knock, Knock! Whos there? Iris.

Iris who? Iris you would open the door.

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Sally sees six sleepy sheep when Sally should be sleeping.

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What do you call a lion with no eyes? Lon!

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What can travel all over the world without anyone seeing it? The wind.

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Its curious how curious I am. I eyeball everything. I am. I am. I am.

I am! What am I? An eye.

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Knock, Knock! Whos there? Don. Don who? Don be afraidlook into my eyesyou are feeling sleepy

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I saw Sues shoe and if I saw Sues shoe than you saw Sues shoe too.

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There was an old lady from Glowing.
Big parties she always was throwing.
But then her eyeballs fell out,
and she started to shout
because now she cant see where shes going.

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What color eyes do you have? Are they green or are they maybe blue or brown? The color of the eye depends on the iris. Look in the mirror.

The colored part of your eye is called the iris. The iris controls the amount of light that enters the eye. Light enters through the pupil, or the small opening in the center of the iris. The pupil gets smaller with more light and bigger when there is less light. ITS TRUE.

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Limericks are five-line poems.

The end of the first, second, and fifth lines of the verse rhyme. The third and fourth lines, which are shorter, also rhyme.

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Why are teddy bears never hungry? Because they are always stuffed.

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A careless zookeeper named Blake
fell into a tropical lake.
Said a fat alligator
a few minutes later,
Very nice, but I still prefer steak.

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What do sea monsters eat? Fish and ships!

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Why are vampires so thin? They eat necks to nothing!

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What time is it when astronauts are hungry? Launch time!

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Why did the car have a stomachache? It had too much gas.

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Is it better to write on a full stomach or an empty stomach? Neither.

Its better to write on paper.

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Why did the sea monster eat five ships that were carrying potatoes? No one can eat just one potato ship!

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Knock, Knock! Whos there? U-8. U-8 who? U-8 my candy bar!

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What kind of button cant you unbutton? A belly button.

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There was young lady of Spain
who was dreadfully sick on a train,
not once, but again,
and again and again
and again and again and again.

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Shellys stomach shook on the ship, so Shelly got sick.

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Knock, Knock! Whos there? Justin.

Justin who? Justin time for dinner!

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Knock, Knock! Whos there? Gladys. Gladys who? Gladys lunch time, Im starved!

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The silly sound from Sammys sisters sons spoiled stomach sounded somewhat serious.

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Are you ever sitting in class and everything is quiet? All of a sudden your stomach makes a soft growling sound. Stomach growling can happen at any time. Ever wonder why your stomach growls? Growling can happen because you are hungry. It can also happen after you eat.

Your food takes many twists and turns through your body. Along the way, pockets of air and gas form. These pockets make the growling noise in your stomach and intestines. ITS TRUE.

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What do you call a monkey with no fingers? A monkey.

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Knock, Knock! Whos there? Raisin.

Raisin who? Raisin our hands before we speak.

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How many pens could a hen hold if a hen had hands to hold pens?

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Why didnt the finger cross the road? There was no point.

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Doctor, doctor! When I press with my finger here... it hurts, and here... it hurts, and here... and here...

What do you think is wrong with me? You have a broken finger!

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What happens when you stick your hand in water? It gets wet!

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What has one eye but cannot see? A finger.

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What likes to shake but has no hands? A rattlesnake.